Emotional Vulnerability

I was reading a thread the other day when someone was saying that with losing weight was feeling like their protective shield was being stripped (I'm paraphrasing) and old feelings starting to resurface? I read with interest, but blimey am I having a weird time in my head this last couple of days.......

Whoops double post.

I do think we can feel more vulnerable when we start losing weight. We also get flooded with emotions when we stop using food as comfort, for those who do, and have to deal with those feelings.

I have a bit of social anxiety and being big could make that worse, attracting attention etc but it could also protect me. People didn't want to sit next to me on the bus because of the lack of space and now they do and it makes me cringe. When people hug me they can put their arms around me so I feel awkward, I like my personal space and I'm still not used to it being invaded now. I think the way I carried myself meant that people stayed away but now I have a bit more confidence and self respect people are not put off approaching me. I find the worse thing is men. I never got asked out when I was big. I imagine the same reasons as I put above. I gave off a vibe but now it happens quite often. I've been told to be flattered but I find it uncomfortable. I'm in a relationship so that might be why but I nearly went for coffee with a friend's friend the other day because I thought he meant it as a friend. Luckily she let me know he wanted a date! Maybe I'm naive because I'm just not used to the attention since I've lost my shield as you put it.

There are definitely a lot of emotions to get through as you lose weight and it's something they don't tend to talk about when you talk through it with the professionals. Apart from the psychologist but I didn't get to see one of those.

One good thing is this place though. There is always someone who has experienced what you have and talking about these things help

Went out last night, really made effort with make up and hair, new clothes, everybody said I looked great, got really supportive partner, but I was so freaked by the whole experience, it's like I forgot what it's like to look good, got home and went to bed with that many layers on.....

my "fat shield" is slowly going but as a result I mostly feel epic! more confident and willing to show what was already inside me the only thing I still hold on to is attending big gatherings like parties and family bashes only because after the WLS I lose a front tooth so very aware of that and if im honest that so far is the only worry I have ...will need to pratice smiling that showing off the gap in my face! will need to save up to fix that

My head is well and truly embedded, hoping this passes soon

Not embedded, shedded, or maybe it is embedded....somewhere it needs to get out of...

NHS dentistry will help with that. Seriously.

Our brains are slower than our bodies when it comes to weight loss. But yeah, those of us who saw the layers as keeping people out well stands to reason it is scary. And then some.

Happy to report it gets better.

Thank you, this bit of the journey has shocked me TBH

I always had a past embedded in my layers .....and hence as I've shed those layers I have found myself dealing with those old issues again..... I also find now i'm also putting on extra layers (clothes wise) maybe they physically take the place of the fat???

Aah Crystal it was your thread! I have this underlying anxiety that just niggles away at the edges, really difficult to explain, especially to my partner. It's a bit out of the blue, thought I'd put many ghosts to rest years ago.

Thought so lol if you want to chat it out pm me will be happy share my experiences too x x x it may explain things clearer and help make sense of what your going thru...... its a huge emotional journey.....figuring out the old head makes it easier for sure