Alcohol problems post bypass

[shelleymarie]

I know alcohol is severely frowned upon by many posts by bypass people. I hope people can give me the advice I would give them in similar circumstances. This is the hardest thing I've ever admitted to anyone, seriously, no one in world knows I feel this way.

I spoke to my dietician and drank some alcohol from 4 months post op. Although my dietician recommends from a year out. All was well for quite some time but recently I've found I've been drinking too much. Alcohol feels completely different to how it did and I've had such a bad time lately (I mean jobless, homeless, friendless) I've used it as an excuse for not eating properly.

I've recently been told I've got liver function problems. Obviously drinking is the first thing that comes to mind. So I will have to stop drinking. I had liver problems when I first had the bypass, I was sick for 8 weeks, wasn't drinking even water had funny effect on my liver readings. Anyway, I still think I need to cut down on alcohol. I knew before I had my bypass that I drank too much and that having a bypass meant I was at risk of alcohol problems but I was in such a risk of dying of blood pressure/stroke etc. I decided to take the risk. I paid for my own, maybe I would have learnt more if I'd gone NHS but I was too scared I would die before I got the surgery. If life was happy whilst being so much slimmer it would be great but god it is not. Harder than ever. Anyone else struggle with the same problem? I don't want to give up alcohol completely but I certainly want to stop it enough to feel healthier and be healthier. So maybe that is to give up forever.

If I'm a lesson to anyone, then maybe that is a good thing too xx

 

[Jackiesnewstart]

Shelly if friends are only friends when you are drinking with them they are not your friends, if they are there for you when you are going through the bad times you are lucky. Jobs and fairweather friends will come and go you need to get yourself healthy and if that involves cutting out the booze so be it.

Your life is more important than anything else, look in the mirror and see what you have done for yourself through your own hard work.
Look after yourself xx

 

[Yvessa]

I know alcohol is severely frowned upon by many posts by bypass people. I hope people can give me the advice I would give them in similar circumstances. This is the hardest thing I've ever admitted to anyone, seriously, no one in world knows I feel this way.

I spoke to my dietician and drank some alcohol from 4 months post op. Although my dietician recommends from a year out. All was well for quite some time but recently I've found I've been drinking too much. Alcohol feels completely different to how it did and I've had such a bad time lately (I mean jobless, homeless, friendless) I've used it as an excuse for not eating properly.

I've recently been told I've got liver function problems. Obviously drinking is the first thing that comes to mind. So I will have to stop drinking. I had liver problems when I first had the bypass, I was sick for 8 weeks, wasn't drinking even water had funny effect on my liver readings. Anyway, I still think I need to cut down on alcohol. I knew before I had my bypass that I drank too much and that having a bypass meant I was at risk of alcohol problems but I was in such a risk of dying of blood pressure/stroke etc. I decided to take the risk. I paid for my own, maybe I would have learnt more if I'd gone NHS but I was too scared I would die before I got the surgery. If life was happy whilst being so much slimmer it would be great but god it is not. Harder than ever. Anyone else struggle with the same problem? I don't want to give up alcohol completely but I certainly want to stop it enough to feel healthier and be healthier. So maybe that is to give up forever.

If I'm a lesson to anyone, then maybe that is a good thing too xx

Oh hun what a year you've had. I'm pretty sure you've already given yourself a hard time so I'm not going to. One thing a friend did to cut back was to pick two days a week where drinks were allowed and she would only drink those two days. Would that help?

 

[femfrankie]

Awww Shelley it's a hard one. I'm fortunate that alcohol just doesn't have that kind of hold on me.... I have however been known to get occasionally inebriated especially at our monthly family get togethers. Since the early part of the year I decided it was easier to just not drink alcohol at all. Previous to that i found one drink always led to another and to another then I would be so racked with guilt by it all that it just wasn't worth it. I think yesterday was the first time ever when questioned about how much alcohol do i consume that i answered with a totally honest ..none.
I would be fibbing if I said I don't miss it at all but I think it's the "drinking to be sociable" side of it that I miss. Once I have my watered down j2o in my hand I forget that its not an alcoholic drink in there and it's let the party begin .
The important thing is you know that alcohol is doing your health no good and are making preparations to fix it. It's jst finding what works best for you xx

 

[tealovingsleever]

Sorry to hear of your struggles and I admire you recognising them. Unfortunately I think alcohol can be an all or nothing thing. I would recommend going cold turkey and trying to get through a day, a week etc. knock it on the head completely.

My father is an alcoholic. It ruins lives. As a result I rarely drink. Maybe it's because I don't know any different but i don't need it.

Lots of luck dealing with this. You can do it xx

 

[pooh71]

Shelley, so sorry to hear your struggles. I drank an awful lot before my op, and for years! I averaged a bottle of wine a night, and weekends, well lets not go there! It was mostly drinking at home with nice meals and it was to help me to destress from work. I could drink it like it was water!
When I had my consultation, the surgeon said I was on a rocky path if I carried on like this post-op as I was going to wreck my body, not only through too many calories, but health wise. He said to me you either manage it and and have a glass at family celebrations or stop altogether.
You know what, I never in the month of Sundays thought I'd stop. But I did! The decision I made was to not have a drop post-op, and I'm 6 months in and still haven't. Yes, I've felt sometimes I could reach for a glass, but I've stopped myself. I've had to as I know if I just have one, it'll lead to more. I have an addictive nature, so had to face up to that.

If you're getting liver problems, I would say go cold turkey. You have changed your life once already, you can do it again. You are so worth it. Take care xx

 

[lyzzyanne]

poor you, all addiction is hard, alcohol,food,drugs and i think we are here because we don't know how to stop. I think our ops leave us with drink being the one thing that goes down real easy!!
I don't know which way is best for you, only you will know that. I wish you luck
xxxxxxxxx

 

[ThinnerJemima]

I agree with Victoria in that alcohol is an all or nothing, but it's never been my vice, I am still struggling to stop my demon.

You seem such a lovely lady and I hope you can get this sorted.

:grouphugg:

 

[WitchInWorthing]

Shelley, my heart goes out to you, it sounds like you have so much on your plate at the moment that it is no wonder you are needing alcohol to help you through - we all use one crutch or another it is just some are more destructive. Can you speak to your GP about this? Maybe get some counselling to look at alternative coping mechanisms.

One thing I know about being fat is when my life feels out of control I tend to use food, not to make myself feel better, but to punish myself for not being as perfect as I want to be. I am not saying this is the case for you, but with everything going on, the alcohol is being a tool not a social choice (I know you know this) and you need something else instead.

I can't help with the job or a home, but I tell you something girl - you read these posts on here and the one thing you DO have is friends. We might not be knocking on the door with a hug, but we are all with you in spirit and sending you every positive thought we can. You tell us what you need and we will be there for you.

Well done for posting about this and the next step is to start sorting it out ... with your friends

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[carrieb]

Shelley I'm so sorry to read your post - you always seem so strong and positive in your help and advice to others. I don't know what to advise really, but I think you probably know that the best thing would be to stop - and only have a drink on special occasions, if at all, at least for the time being. I'd would hate to see all your hard work undone. Wishing you luck, and don't be afraid to ask for help xx

 

[sarahrob]

Oh Shelley, I wish I could give you a hug right now. I would echo what Witch said, you do have friends who are here for you.

You can and will get through this, whether you decide to give up completely or to cut back.

Xxxx

 

[Bookie]

Hi, Shelley.

You've answered your own post, really. You know what the solution is, the question is, are you prepared to do it?

Time to take a long, hard look at yourself and your life and decide what you want to do with it, live it or waste it.

You have liver problems and you drink. It's not a difficult one to figure. Get help and give up drinking, or die a horrible and painful way. Sorry, I am not going to sugar coat it, these are your options.

You sound lovely, and it looks as if you've had a really hard time of it lately, so I hope you don't take this post the wrong way, but ultimately, no amount of cyber hand-patting is going to make you wake up, whereas I hope this post is going to make you face facts and act.

{{{HUGS}}}

 

[Tezza]

Oh Shelley, I wish I could give you a hug right now. I would echo what Witch said, you do have friends who are here for you.

You can and will get through this, whether you decide to give up completely or to cut back.

Xxxx

Hi Shelly, I agree completely with this. Take care. Big hugs xx

 

[shelleymarie]

Wow. I seriously can't believe the support you have given me in such short space of time. Not just here but in private messages and on Facebook. I'm completely overwhelmed. This forum has been a a complete life saver to me and I mean that literally. I didn't post about it but a little while a go I had a suspected brain tumour that turned out to be shingles of the brain. I ended up losing my hearing in one ear. I could have been completely paralysed on one side of my face so I was really lucky. Anyway the point is so much has happened in the last year, the year that has meant to be the start of my new life, but not much of it has be good. I've enjoyed every NSV and I've worked bloody hard for my weight loss but I've also failed in many ways and alcohol has been one of them. I appreciate your candour, kindness and honesty and agree I couldn't beat myself up more for this is I tried. In May I walked out of my new job that paid incredibly well (not for other people but for me) because I couldn't cope. I planned to walk to the train station and well....It's still to hard to talk about but my dad turned up to pick me up and I told him everything. Everything apart from the drinking. You guys are the only ones I've told about that. I have decided to give up for now if I can. When I saw my gp he said cut back but if I needed help they would give it too me so If I struggle I will let him know. I've given up addictive eating and smoking so I know I can do this too. I hope one day I can still drink socially but if I can't then I can't and I'll have to accept that. I'm sure there is more to life. I just need to find out what it is because I'm only 32 and I've not found it yet.

Again thank you so much for your support, in all forms, it is much appreciated. It has made me feel like I am worth something and seriously I haven't felt that way for a long while xx

 

[A.Positive]

Oh gosh Shellya! You poor thing.

You have been given some great advice here and I would agree that giving alcohol up altogether is the best option. I know it's easier said than done though. I hope you are able to get through this and all your other woes.

Take care my love. Xx

 

[soohoo]

elo.i have to sleep with sleep apnea mask for a month and anesthatist will decide if its settle enough for my my surgery.but I do like my red wine.and our nights in.it as got a habit.my husband works shifts and when it is his days off we have a drink.when its my days off we have a drink.so it gets to 5/6 days a week.last few week im so close I have cut down.1 year out not drinking will do us good.it will be hard work with all the celebration that come and go.i don't know if I have any answers.but your not on your own.take care

 

[LifesAJourney]

Hey Shelly, first off thank you for sharing something so deeply personal with everyone here that takes a lot of strength and courage!!!! And because you have that in you, I know you love yourself enough to seek out help and advice which means within yourself you want to change. You need to realize that you are worth so much more than the moments of uncontrolled escape that alcohol offers us. You are worth your liver being healthy enough to sustain you for the rest of your life! You have been through so much this past year and you have made it... so you are a survivor!!! Do some soul searching within yourself and ask yourself what is this drink giving me ... what am I lacking that I can't find fullfillment in something else less damaging to you. I know what you are going through is difficult but remember you are WORTH so much more then what the bottom of a bottle has to offer. You can beat this!!! believe in yourself!!! I wish you all the best!!! xx

 

[Beegee]

oh you poor thing... you have had a rough time. But the first step with dealing with a problem is recognising it is a problem. If you can cut down the alcohol your liver will fully recover in no time at all so you can stop beating yourself up about it. Love me x

 

[Bookie]

Have you tried AA? I think that however supportive this group is, you might be better off joining a "real" group, one made of people who will know exactly what you're dealing with, and will help you fight your demons.

 

[Lilacglittergirl]

Hi Shelley. You've got guts girl. Wow, so strong. To 'come out' on here. You know you are amongst friends. Please don't see any of this as a weakness. It is not. You made a decision to take over control of your weight by putting yourself in the hands of a surgeon, so now maybe is the time to seek a solution to this situation. You say you had your bypass privately - so did I. My provider is there for me. I think that if I was in a similar position, maybe rather than speaking to my GP I would seek the ear of the team shrink. You are only just over a year post-op so the team should still be there for you. We need monitoring for the rest of our lives, afterall.

Good luck with it all. Keep strong and focussed. Answers really do not lie in a bottle - but depression and health complications do. I don't mean that harshly ... But just return, if you can, to where you were in your head when you made the decision to have the bypass.

Hugs a million xx