People worrying too much?

[Popadopalous]

Hey everyone. I'm around 13 months post op now, 9 stone 11 pounds with a bmi of 19.7. Although I'm considered a healthy weight, everyone says 9.11 is really low for a man. I don't look stick thin or a bag of bones, my build makes me look slightly heavier than I actually am. I can probably afford to lose another few pounds before I start looking like a walking skeleton.

I've stopped trying to diet and calorie counting for a while and I'm just going with the flow now.

All of my friends keep telling me they are concerned I'm loosing too much weight and they assume I'm developing an eating disorder. It's annoying the hell out of me! Does anyone else have friends/family who are like this??

I know they mean well but in their heads, I'm verging on anorexia! ARGH!

Of course I'm worried about regaining and I'm still focused on eating all of the right foods but I do enjoy the odd treat now and again. A bag of crisps or chocolate has never made me gain weight, treats in strict moderation is working well for me.

Even with an odd treat, I'm still consistently loosing weight albeit slowly. I should really up my calorie intake now to maintain though the thought of regaining will always be in the back of my mind.

I've always joked that if I ever become underweight, I'll go and get my first ever McDonalds since bypass to help me regain quickly.

 

[shelleymarie]

If you aren't under weight or obsessing with losing weight/counting calories then what is there to worry about? I think people are so used to seeing us a big they do worry when we lose a lot of weight and I think it can bring out insecurities in some people too. As you can see from my stats I've still got a lot of weight to lose but I've just started to get some comments, not that I need to stop but I should slow down but I've a long way to being a healthy weight. I'm sure you know more than me being further down the line but maybe healthy, calorie dense foods like avocado, peanut butter, more complex carbs etc will help you maintain now x

 

[ThinnerJemima]

Yes I get this too and I still have more to lose. I think that it's jealousy from the particular people that say it to me rather than genuine concern.

It's a bit annoying. Someone recommended a good way to deal with this, just agree. That way they get to hear what they want and leave me alone.

Keep your eye on things to make sure that you are really ok though as you are the one that matters.

 

[Samsara]

Are you happy with where you are right now? If yes, then just stay as you are with a view to maintaining. Are you still having follow up appointments with your team/dietician and have they raised any concerns? You will know what is best for you and more so than any well-meaning friends or family so like Jemima says you could just agree to get them off your back to save getting into a debate about it! Or agree to disagree! Well done in getting to goal anyway and good luck with maintenance x x

 

[Miss Tickle]

I think your BMI is on the low side hun. I've read no one should aim for a BMI under 20.
The not being too bony thing is interesting. I'm a woman, the same height as you and nearly 2 stone heavier ( 11 stone 11lbs). I had aimed to get down to 11 stone 2lbs but I am definately very bony at this weight. My face is thin, my ribs are visible front and back, my knee bones rub together in the night and I can cup my hip bones in my hands. I do have a lot of loose skin though so that probably weighs a few pounds.
I don't lose weight now and do have treats. I have a treat every day in fact. I am terrified of putting weight on so still weigh every day.
I think you should go and have that Macdonalds and relax a little. Are you sure you don't look very thin? I'm dysmophic so still look fat to myself in the mirror even though I wear a size 10/ 12. If you were BMI 28 and people were saying you were too thin I'd agree, yes ,maybe they are jealous, or unused to you seeing you slim. But at a BMI of 19 I think perhaps they are saying you are too thin because they are worried about you because you really are too thin.
As you have lost quickly and are still losing I think it's time to see your team for advice sweetheart.
Good luck xx

 

[Samsara]

Calculate your BMI :: Men's Health

Normal or "healthy" weight range = BMI of 18.5-24.9

When I checked your BMI on this page it came out at 19.6 which put you in the "normal" range for a male. It says anything under 18.5 is considered underweight.

I also did your calculations on the NHS BMI calculator and again it puts you in the healthy weight category. It was also showing anything under 18.5 as underweight. I think if you get under 9stone 3lbs then you will be in the underweight category for your height. I'm sure you know all this anyway x x

 

[Popadopalous]

Are you happy with where you are right now? If yes, then just stay as you are with a view to maintaining. Are you still having follow up appointments with your team/dietician and have they raised any concerns? You will know what is best for you and more so than any well-meaning friends or family so like Jemima says you could just agree to get them off your back to save getting into a debate about it! Or agree to disagree! Well done in getting to goal anyway and good luck with maintenance x x

I am very happy actually. I'm happy with the way I look now.

I don't have any follow up appointments now and don't speak to my dietician. We agreed that since my progress has been fantastic and without problems, I no longer require their help but they are only a phone call away for advice and stuff if I want it or if I'm concerned for any reason.

Post op support was never that brilliant to begin with, in comparison to what NHS patients get. Though I genuinely didn't have any problems or require much support so didn't need to call upon them for anything.

 

[Elmo10]

Hi popadopolous. What procedure did u have done.

 

[Popadopalous]

I think your BMI is on the low side hun. I've read no one should aim for a BMI under 20.
The not being too bony thing is interesting. I'm a woman, the same height as you and nearly 2 stone heavier ( 11 stone 11lbs). I had aimed to get down to 11 stone 2lbs but I am definately very bony at this weight. My face is thin, my ribs are visible front and back, my knee bones rub together in the night and I can cup my hip bones in my hands. I do have a lot of loose skin though so that probably weighs a few pounds.
I don't lose weight now and do have treats. I have a treat every day in fact. I am terrified of putting weight on so still weigh every day.
I think you should go and have that Macdonalds and relax a little. Are you sure you don't look very thin? I'm dysmophic so still look fat to myself in the mirror even though I wear a size 10/ 12. If you were BMI 28 and people were saying you were too thin I'd agree, yes ,maybe they are jealous, or unused to you seeing you slim. But at a BMI of 19 I think perhaps they are saying you are too thin because they are worried about you because you really are too thin.
As you have lost quickly and are still losing I think it's time to see your team for advice sweetheart.
Good luck xx

My GP isn't too concerned. As long as I remain in the healthy range then he's happy. I personally hate the bmi scale!

My collar bone is quite boney but that's pretty much it. I can only see my ribs if I suck in my tummy but standing naturally, don't look boney at all. I'll upload a recent picture when I get back to my computer.

 

[natashoorrr]

Haha don't you just love it? People moan when you're too fat.. people moan when you're too thin.

How about they worry about themselves!!

I am currently in the 'too fat' catagory and already people are asking if I'm worried about getting too thin and its already annoying me so lord knows how I will be when it actually happens!

 

[Samsara]

My GP isn't too concerned. As long as I remain in the healthy range then he's happy. I personally hate the bmi scale!

My collar bone is quite boney but that's pretty much it. I can only see my ribs if I suck in my tummy but standing naturally, don't look boney at all. I'll upload a recent picture when I get back to my computer.

Yes, the BMI isn't the best of indicators as a bodybuilder can be defined as obese using it!

Looking forward to seeing a piccy x x