feeling even fatter than i did before

[Laura b]

hi everyone :wave_cry:
im new on here so hope iv posted this message to the correct place, im on the first stages of my wl journey iv just been refered for surgery after many failed attempts at losing weight and keeping it off done slim fast, diet pills, healthy eating and exercise i went to weight watchers lost 6 stone within 5 months but a yr later had put it all back on, then got refered to a weight management team at heartlands hospital where i seen a team of specialists including a dietician lost 3 stone but iv put it all back on so now ive decided surgery is my only choice if i wanna loose the weight and keep it off, but since iv been refered i feel so fat fatter than i did before, iv felt fat, frumpy, very down, and ive had a constent headache i feel even bigger is that normal or am i just realised i carnt kid anyone im not the size i thought i was im acually much bigger??? :cry:

 

[Sambucca]

Laura, you have posted in the right place hun

I had a similar problem when I was pre op. I was in denial about how big I was. I mean I knew what size clothes I was wearing but when I looked in the mirror I didnt see a fat person. Its only now when I look back at photos that I see I was actually huge.

You will go through a range of emotions whilst waiting for surgery, from desperation, denial, fear, acceptance.... and many more.

Its a long journey and you may visit each emotion several times. I seriously considered backing out for a brief moment about a month pre op, but am so glad I didnt.

 

[Craftslinda]

Had exact same problem after refferal suddenly could feel the weight on me more than ever. Am just starting to pull myself round and look forward

 

[gaelic girl]

Hi Laura and welcome to a fantastic site, if its support you want we are all waiting and happy to help. I too can relate to what you are saying i knew i was big but just how big i refused to believe it was possible. I always relate this journey to being on a rollercoaster its full of ups and downs, twists and turns and highs and lows but oh how worth it, it is. Good luck hun x

 

[Chuffy_29]

Laura. I feel like that too, since i decided to do this i have really noticed the amount of overweight+ people are around and how much bigger i am then them. On the plus side i know i am doing something about it! Everyone here is lovely really helpful and supportive. Look forward to getting to know you.

 

[emma-louise]

hello sam,

hope you dont mind but Ive got to send you a message to tell you how brilliant you look!..

Im new on this site,and I came across your posting,and noticed you had written,you almost backed out of surgery a month before.
My surgery is due in 3 weeks,and today I feel sick!
Im so worried,am I doing the right thing?
Its so hard when I have too very young children,but I need to loose 10 stones..so this is my one chance,of being able to play with my children in the near future...Im just very worried at the minute.

anyway you look so nice!well done

 

[Bev]

Hi Laura,

So pleased to 'meet' you and look forward very much to getting to know you.

The way you are feeling, impacts very much in the same way with a lot of us... when my Consultant suggested that I should be a candidate for WLS, I had never considered this before and felt very self conscious about my size.

I am finding that the reality of my weight has now hit home and it has motivated me to really try and help myself... although that can be easier said than done.

My general view is to do something good for you each day and to try and work through the issues, feelings, emotions as much as possible prior to the surgery...

I am currently away from work, having recently had treatment for cancer, so please feel free to send me a message anytime if I can help in any way or if you feel like some support or a chat.

Wishing you every good wish on your journey, please don't feel dispondent if you seem to take two steps backwards and one forwards... it's the same for us all...

But hang on to us, we have broad shoulders and will certainly be here if you need support (I found this site by accident... I have tried to escape)... but it's not worked since I have made some lovely friends, we now meet up and keep in touch personally... so the support is second to none...

Sending you a huge hug and love to help you on your journey, with every good wish, Bev xxx

 

[thinnerangela]

Me too!!

I was referred for surgery and actually thought I was a fraud for asking - I wasn't that big - nobody noticed me!!

I was 24+ st and in size 32/34 clothes - I'm appalled at my pre-op photos - and the measurements I had - how could I not see it?

And now I realise everybody looked at me - probably in disgust - now I notice no-one takes a second glance! Though I still feel that they "know" I was enormous.

Ask away if you have questions or worries - someone will pop along with an answer

Good luck

xx

 

[Laura b]

Laura, you have posted in the right place hun

I had a similar problem when I was pre op. I was in denial about how big I was. I mean I knew what size clothes I was wearing but when I looked in the mirror I didnt see a fat person. Its only now when I look back at photos that I see I was actually huge.

You will go through a range of emotions whilst waiting for surgery, from desperation, denial, fear, acceptance.... and many more.

Its a long journey and you may visit each emotion several times. I seriously considered backing out for a brief moment about a month pre op, but am so glad I didnt.

thanks sam and its thanks to u that i plucked up the courage to do this after seeing how fantatic u look and after speaking on the phone and u telling me how differant ur life is u know wearing nice new clothes feeling fit and that, it how i wanna feel i think i was in denial but now iv gone for it and dr refered me without me even having to talk them into it iv realised that im massive roll on surgery thats wat i say xxxx

 

[Laura b]

Had exact same problem after refferal suddenly could feel the weight on me more than ever. Am just starting to pull myself round and look forward

its a horrible feeling isnt it i feel as though iv put on 5 stone in like a day i feel so huge and horrible hopefully once iv seen the surgeon ill feel better although ill feel big and be big until my surgery im sure ill feel better once ive seen him, good luck on ur journey of wl hun xxx

 

[Laura b]

Hi Laura and welcome to a fantastic site, if its support you want we are all waiting and happy to help. I too can relate to what you are saying i knew i was big but just how big i refused to believe it was possible. I always relate this journey to being on a rollercoaster its full of ups and downs, twists and turns and highs and lows but oh how worth it, it is. Good luck hun x

omg u look fantastic well done u, im ready for the rollercoaster ride after looking and seeing how fab u all look and with everyone support im sure ill be fine thanks for ur message xxxx

 

[Bev]

Hi Laura,
It is a feeling and emotion that we seem to all go through, it is an acceptance step and part of our ongoing journey, my denial has worn and I'm getting my brain into training!

Keep moving forward and keep in touch...

A huge hug on it's way to you!

xxx

 

[Laura b]

Laura. I feel like that too, since i decided to do this i have really noticed the amount of overweight+ people are around and how much bigger i am then them. On the plus side i know i am doing something about it! Everyone here is lovely really helpful and supportive. Look forward to getting to know you.

yes u are doing something about it and so am i so we should feel good for that, but its a horrible feeling isnt it i just carnt believe how big iv let myself become iv got a great family though and great support on here so i know ill get there in the end i know its not gonna happen over night although ild love it too, thanks for ur message and good luck on your journey of wl xxx

 

[yorkiegal]

Hi Laura, welcome to the site. I'm pre op too and feel the same as you. It's like the weight has suddenly caught up with me and I feel so bloated and ugly. I think it's because we're stuck in limbo, waiting to have the surgery having made this huge decision to go ahead with it, and we just want it done now.

 

[Laura b]

hello sam,

hope you dont mind but Ive got to send you a message to tell you how brilliant you look!..

Im new on this site,and I came across your posting,and noticed you had written,you almost backed out of surgery a month before.
My surgery is due in 3 weeks,and today I feel sick!
Im so worried,am I doing the right thing?
Its so hard when I have too very young children,but I need to loose 10 stones..so this is my one chance,of being able to play with my children in the near future...Im just very worried at the minute.

anyway you look so nice!well done

sams my cousin and she does look absolutely fantastic she really does
i feel this way too and im not even close to having surgery yet, iv got a 7 yr old and a 3 month old and the thought of having surgery and not making it makes me physically sick all because ive ate too much and got way too big.
like u i have about 10 stone to loose too and i see it as my only option after speaking with sam she said that i could think like that and never do it or carry on the way i am and have a risk of dying anyway which i believe to be so true, im sure all will b well and ul be looking as fab as sam very soon, good luck xxxxx

 

[Laura b]

Hi Laura, welcome to the site. I'm pre op too and feel the same as you. It's like the weight has suddenly caught up with me and I feel so bloated and ugly. I think it's because we're stuck in limbo, waiting to have the surgery having made this huge decision to go ahead with it, and we just want it done now.

i think your right we must be stuck in limbo as i feel the same, i always have ppl say to me your big but your beautiful if u lose your weight you wont be the same and for years ive believed that and thought well im not that bad im big but theres bigger, now all of a sudden i feel like the biggest person in the universe and i feel so ugly, im not even worried about srgery now the sooner the better is all i can say i wanna be half the women i am today like literally lol carnt wait good luck with your surgery xxx

 

[Laura b]

Hi Laura,

So pleased to 'meet' you and look forward very much to getting to know you.

The way you are feeling, impacts very much in the same way with a lot of us... when my Consultant suggested that I should be a candidate for WLS, I had never considered this before and felt very self conscious about my size.

I am finding that the reality of my weight has now hit home and it has motivated me to really try and help myself... although that can be easier said than done.

My general view is to do something good for you each day and to try and work through the issues, feelings, emotions as much as possible prior to the surgery...

I am currently away from work, having recently had treatment for cancer, so please feel free to send me a message anytime if I can help in any way or if you feel like some support or a chat.

Wishing you every good wish on your journey, please don't feel dispondent if you seem to take two steps backwards and one forwards... it's the same for us all...

But hang on to us, we have broad shoulders and will certainly be here if you need support (I found this site by accident... I have tried to escape)... but it's not worked since I have made some lovely friends, we now meet up and keep in touch personally... so the support is second to none...

Sending you a huge hug and love to help you on your journey, with every good wish, Bev xxx

:cry:thank you you have brought a tear to my eye because like u say we all feel the same and its so nice to see theres people that care so much about each other its nice iv got nice people to go on my journey with thanks so much for your support.
sorry to hear about your cancer i hope u are well now youve had treatment, im off work too as ive just had a baby hes 3 months old and i have a little boy whos nearly 7 they are my world and part of the reason i want too lose all this horrible weight i want to keep up with them at the park, be able to fit on baby rides at the fun fair with them and not worry that i aint gonna fit
thanks for your support its lovely
good luck to u on ur journey and if i can be of any support of any kind for a chat im always here too xxxx

 

[Laura b]

Me too!!

I was referred for surgery and actually thought I was a fraud for asking - I wasn't that big - nobody noticed me!!

I was 24+ st and in size 32/34 clothes - I'm appalled at my pre-op photos - and the measurements I had - how could I not see it?

And now I realise everybody looked at me - probably in disgust - now I notice no-one takes a second glance! Though I still feel that they "know" I was enormous.

Ask away if you have questions or worries - someone will pop along with an answer

Good luck

xx

you look fantastic what a brilliant result thanks so much for your message everyones been so kind xxx

 

[Bev]

Awww Laura, thank you.

I imagine you have a really busy time with your little one and seven year old... look forward to being able to do so much more with them and sharing so many activities...

My positive thinking gets me through most things... when I first came to the site I was hoping that I could leave the cancer treatment behind and concentrate on my weight issues... but I have discovered such a wealth of wonderful people, it wasn't difficult for me to share my cancer experience, but I don't let it wear me down.... in that I try to sprinkle a little positivity and try to share experience with others with my issues, I am fortunate that being one of the older members, I have seen most things, done most things and met many of life's challenges...

We all walk shoulder to shoulder on our respective journey's and although we have so much in common through our weight loss goals, everyone brings so much individuality to this site.

Take good care Laura, always at your side,

Bev xxx

 

[Sambucca]

Laura, I can honestly say that every time I see you I think you look beautiful. Your hair and make up are always immaculate, and yes you may be bigger than you want to be, but our family is full of large women so I never saw you as anything but normal.

But its how we feel ourselves that is important. You are on the right road hun, and now you have joined this forum you can see for yourself the good and the bad of WLS.

I have been very lucky and have had an "easy" time of my WLS but not everyone has it as straight forward as me.

I really hope and pray that your wait for surgery is not too long. Do all the research you can, and once you have seen the surgeon there is nothing to stop you trying to get a head start on your weight loss. (Dont do it now though, you want to be as heavy as poss for your first appointment as they will measure any weight loss from that point)

You know where I am if theres anything at all I can do x