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i want a baby...

fatbutnot4long

New Member
hi everyone... well let me just give u the history with me... ive got pcos, ive had it for a long time.. even when i wasnet so fat! me and my hubby was trying for a baby after a yr of being together with no luck so i went to see the gyno.. he told me to lose weight blah blah blah.. i couldnt do it so asked me gp about the band.. he refered me for a band... the surgeon told me the bypass would be better and it has worked for me... 6 months later 8 stone down and 3 stone off target BUT i still want a baby and i dont want to wait any longer.. i know im not ment to try for 2 years but this was never about losing weight for me its always been about having a baby! ive only ever wanted to be a mummy and i dont see it happening! i have no idea what to do now?! or if losing weight has even helped! i know before (when i was really fat) that i only had 3 periods a yr and since decemeber ive had 1 EVERY month ON TIME :D but does that mean im fertile! or is being mummy just a dream for me? can you increase your fertility by losing weight?? im thinking about it ALL the time and its doing my swede in! please help and advice welcome! xx
 

galm37

New Member
Hi Kirsty
fertility is supposed to increase with weight loss, have you tried an ovulation test? You can get them at the pharmacy. I don't know how 'safe' it would be for you to get pregnant yet though. Perhaps it would be better if you talked to your team 1st and get their advice. I know the paperwork I received after my op said not to get pregnant for 1 year, but all surgeons differ in their advice.

Good luck x
 

fatbutnot4long

New Member
mine say 2 years :( i really dont want to wait that long.. i have just bought some ovulation tests so i hope they work! x
 

fatbutnot4long

New Member
thank you! i hope it has helped but im not too sure.. ive tried to google n read about other ppl being pregnant after the bypass but there not much info! grrr xx
 

galm37

New Member

fatbutnot4long

New Member
thanks you :D i know i should wait but that seems so long as ive already waited years :( x
 

wildthing

New Member
I had PCOS and lost a couple of stone and was prescribed clomiphene which I took for 7 months and hey presto fell preggas. She is now almost 7 years old and the light of my life!
 

salski

New Member
I had the op for the same reason. I am 14 months out and have still been told to wait. I only had the op so I could have children. It is literally a few more months for you and it would mean a safe pregnancy so think of you and think of your baby.
Sal x
 

gaelic girl

Loving Being a Loser
Can't help with any advice on pregnancy and wls only know what others have said but Shell may come along soon as she has had a baby following surgery so i'm sure she can give you some good advice. I really wish you luck Kirsty as a mum of two i will keep everything crossed that you and your hubby achieve your dream of becoming parents xx
 

StephieAck

I know Ive changed!
I too have PCOS, I have a long history of trying to become a mummy, I have had three operations to sort out my issues (they all failed) one of them being ovarian drilling. I was tried on Clomid for months with no success. After all of that they said that my problems were obviously caused by my weight and that if I could just lose four or so stones then my fertility/periods etc would kick in and one doctor actually said "if you promise to go and lose that weight I PROMISE you that you will get pregnant" and the other one said that she truly believed that if that four stones came off then my periods would restart in a natural rythmn and that I would most probably get pregnant without help. I am now almost seven months out from surgery and I had three 'normal' periods for the first three months post-op, I think that they were the result of body shock. Since then I have had no periods, my hormones feel way out of whack and the ovary pain gets intense at times. So I have lost what they asked me to lose and more and it has had no effect and I very much doubt that it is going to be the miracle cure that they think it is. I have a feeling that even when I am at goal and settled in to my new body etc that I will still need assistance to have my baby.
So as you can imagine, having been aiming at having children for at least twelve years, this is a bit disappointing and makes me want to grab those doctors and scream at them "I KNEW it wasnt just the weight, thank you SO much for making me feel like crap for so long...now get me pregnant or I will slap you"...lol...obviously I wouldnt do that but I so want to!
So I know just how all encompassing the desire have a baby is, but look at it this way...do you really want to spend an entire pregnancy worrying that your baby could have health issues because your body may not have everything it needs to nourish both you and the baby? Could you look down at your gorgeous little baby with a clear conscience if it was born with 'issues' because it didnt get everything that it needed when it was growing inside of you? I know that any baby can have health issues and you could have a child that was perfectly fine.
I have found myself thinking lots about babies just lately and I know that I definately want a baby, I am determined that one day I will be a mother, that old familiar tug in my 'gut' is there again, but I have to be responsible, I personally couldnt live with myself if my impatience caused my child to suffer. If I can just wait until the time is right, physically as well as emotionally, then I am giving my potential child the very best chance at health and that is the least I can do for them. I have waited twelve years, what is another one two going to matter if the health and safety of my potential child is going to be better.
Obviously if a miracle happened and against all odds I got pregnant before the recommended then I would deal with that, I would put my everything into nourishing that growing child and I would have to deal with any health issues that occured because of the early timing of the pregnancy but I just dont think that I want that to happen.
The desire for a child is a VERY strong thing, it is very hard to ignore but it really would be best to wait if you can, for the childs sake.
Anyway, I was told that they suggest two years but that one year will probably be long enough to wait. I think that will wait until this time next year though but I will absolutely wait that year at least and will only start my quest for a child again once I can be assured that my body can nourish me AND the child.
So it is all up to you, but seriously think about it, will those extra months that you wait do so much harm to you? Can you not suffer through those extra months so that you can give your child that better start?
Steph xx
 

phatmomma

New Member
Well said Steph.... The surgeons don't tell you not to do something because they are kill joys or are wanting to ruin your life. There is a reason for rules....

Let's be realistic, you are a young lady your biological clock is not running out of batteries just yet! Better to wait and know you are going to have a happy and healthy pregnancy for you and the baby surely?
 

christine77

New Member
hi Kirsty,

i also have pcos and know exactly how you feel being so desperate for a baby, we had tried for so long with no success and this was long before i was the weight i am now. my every moment used to be consumed thinking about babies and everytime anyone at work would announce they were pregnant i would have to leave the room and would sit in the toilets and cry- why couldnt it be me.
the way you need to think of it is that you are now having periods which is a good sign you are ovulating, your body is in shock after having surgery and needs time to settle down. just think with every month that passes not only are you lighter you are also one step closers to being a healthy mum and will be in top fitness and health condition to enjoy your pregnancy.
i was told 5 days before my wedding there was a 95% chance i would never have my own child, but thanks to a prescription for clomid, and a very drunken night with a gut full of champagne - i now have a wonderful healthy 5 year old. i am now waiting to have wls to be a better mum to him, one who can join in playing and swimming and running. - you wont have that to worry about cos you have done that bit you can just enjoy beimg the mum you want to be. i know it seems like forever but it will happen just stay positive- and you could always ask your doctor for a quick dose of clomid it works wonders !!!

take care
 
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