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I've got to let off steam!!

indianlight

New Member
A week today I went to theatre expecting to have a bypass and didn't as most of you know.

I now find myself in the position where people are treating me as if I didn't have an op at all....I know I don't have a bypass and all the issues surrounding it, but I was in theatre over 4 hours and I do take a lot of time to recover from the aneasthetic, it usually takes me a week to start to feel right. At this moment I'm starting to feel normal, but am tired when I do things..

I'm angry and frustrated I didn't get my bypass and feel as if i'm grieving something in the loss of my band..I know it sounds silly but hopefully someone will understand!

However, i've just been asked if I want to go to the pub tonight..then made to feel as if i'm lazy, the comment being 'it is a week after your op' and all this from a bandster...

Am I being lazy or am I being cautious? My normal rule after any kind of op is to make sure i'm 100% well before pushing myself too much, and i'm being made to feel a fraus, which to be honest I do feel a little of 'cos I didn't get my bypass..

sorry for rambling, hope i've made some sense, but i'm sooo frustrated at the moment......arrrghhhh!!!!:mad:
 
Wow four hours! you are doing the right thing being cautious your body has been through a lot and you need adequate time to recover. Do what feels righ for you! Maz x
 
I empathise with you loads. When I had my band out no one really bothered...it was like I had not just had surgery and why couldn't I be up and about a day after? Made me so mad....
 
Hi Indianlight.

You let off steam ,why shouldnt you,i also had a failed bypass and felt so frustrated,and like you i have the scars too prove it.
I spent a few days in bed afterwards so the wounds would start to heal (my excuse),but dont dwell on it,the way i looked at it ,was it wasnt meant to be,there were reasons it didnt happen.look at the positive side and look forward to the next plan of action.


Get some rest,your have still had a op even tho the procedure wasnt carried out.

Chin up and look forward not back.

Di x
 
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definately not being lazy or selfish ect, you need to recover properly, besides going out drinking is consuming empty calories and going to ADD to your weight problems. Real friends will understand your not ready for a full blown social life again just yet, and not make you feel guilty for not being able to keep up with them. Think about what they are going to be like once you have the band in place!
 
A week today I went to theatre expecting to have a bypass and didn't as most of you know.

I now find myself in the position where people are treating me as if I didn't have an op at all....I know I don't have a bypass and all the issues surrounding it, but I was in theatre over 4 hours and I do take a lot of time to recover from the aneasthetic, it usually takes me a week to start to feel right. At this moment I'm starting to feel normal, but am tired when I do things..

I'm angry and frustrated I didn't get my bypass and feel as if i'm grieving something in the loss of my band..I know it sounds silly but hopefully someone will understand!

However, i've just been asked if I want to go to the pub tonight..then made to feel as if i'm lazy, the comment being 'it is a week after your op' and all this from a bandster...

Am I being lazy or am I being cautious? My normal rule after any kind of op is to make sure i'm 100% well before pushing myself too much, and i'm being made to feel a fraus, which to be honest I do feel a little of 'cos I didn't get my bypass..

sorry for rambling, hope i've made some sense, but i'm sooo frustrated at the moment......arrrghhhh!!!!:mad:

hi deb its wrong for people to treat you this way, you still have had a major operation with the band removal and it will take a while to recover from and it will also carry a greiving process with that loss.

im most shocked that the comments about going to the pub has come from another bandster, that person obviously doesnt understand what its like to go through a debanding op, its not just physically draining but mentally draining too and your emotions will be all over right now.

you do whats right for you deb, and dont let anyone make you do anything your not ready to do.


liz xxx
 
hiya Hun ..... well i think its rude of people to be that way.. you did have an op and you still need to recover from what you had done..

it don't matter u never had bypass u still was under 4 hrs ..

and not only that u will be going under again soon you need rest and time to reflect on all the changes around you and so on .

very selfish of a friend to be like that toward you.

you do whats best for you Hun .. you know how you feel better than anyone else and bugga them if you don't want to then don't ..

look after number one Hun xx
 
Thanks very much guys, I knew that my friends here would understand. I've calmed down a bit now but would have exploded if I hadn't let this out somewhere and better here than directed to my OH who has been the brunt of all my frustration and tears and yet has been totally wonderful throughout.

Tendersage, I've had my band out and was in theatre to have a bypass after they took it out but I was a bit of a mess with scar tissue so they couldn't do it.

You are all right I have to consider myself and my health first and although I have been doing this, I've felt so guilty over it and i need to get over that..thanks again for your support xxxx
 
Some people need shaking they are so self centred. You were in surgery longer than most bypassers and have had extensive repair work carried out. You stick by your guns and take it easy.
 
Hey Debs, 4 hours is a very long time to be under and having work done. Its not like they whipped out the band and then left you for hours just for the sake of it. True friends will be there for you and if it was me I'd be calling round to yours to sit and have a calm girly night to keep you company. You do whats best for you and let the others do their own damage. Best wishes xx Gaynor xx
 
aww thats so sad..of course you miss your band in a way..as it did help you lose alot weight..etc..hopefully you can get the bypass to lose the rest of your weight with less problems[i think i read you lost six stone with a band but had problems so have to have it removed and have a bypass]

i had an ear op[mastoidectomy i think they call it] in my left ear when i was 12 and a half and it took 3 and a half hours[the actual surgery itself being done by the surgeon] and an hour in the recovery before being taken back to the ward...and i was very very sick[hence why i remember it 14 and a half years later] after the op and took me good while to recover[i was only in hospital for three days but probably about a month to recover fully]

so based on that i can't imagine how awlful stomach surgery is and to expect to recover so quickly amazes me

stupid me anyway
 
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