Fat head problems!

[ravelling]

I'm sorry if this sounds like whining, but I'm struggling with some head issues related to weight loss.

I'm a teacher and needed to get some 'back to school' clothes as the things I wore before the summer holidays are too big and were for a while before the end of term. I was wearing a 22 or a 20 and pulling things in at the waistbands with my life-line elasticated belt

Anyway, I thought I would get some size 18 clothes and be prepared to shrink into them. I went out this morning and found two skirts, a pair of trousers, two tops and a cardigan. Tried on 18s and found they were all too big. Bought everything in a 16, except the cardigan that I got in a 14 (ok, it's a loose style.)

This shouldn't be a problem. I should be whooping for joy that I've shrunk to this size. And in lots of ways, I am.

However, I felt quite panicked. When I look at myself in the mirror, I still look the same as I always did. I have no idea what size I am, what I look like or what shape I am.

I posted an update photo into my album today and I can see that I am smaller, but I still have a size 30 head.

When I paid for my clothes at the till, logic and sanity tells me that if I fit inside those clothes I must be smaller than the sales assistant. My brain tells me that she's looking at me and thinking "Who does she think she's kidding?"

Do other people experience this or have I got a real problem? How do you get through this?

Sorry this has been a bit long.

 

[CCPM]

Snap!!!

I'm still the 30stone beached whale in my head just don't know who I am yet.

Hopefully it passes.

M

 

[Gerry]

In my late teens, (many moons ago I hasten to add ), I had a friend who was then a size 14. We were typical teenagers and were not embarassed to shower or dress in front of each other. Without wishing to make it sound odd, I used to look at her and then at me and I always thought she looked broader than me. I couldn't understand why she could get into clothes that were a 14 when I was wearing an 18/20. I mentioned this to my GP when he asked about my weight once, and I told him that although I knew I took larger size clothes than my friend, that when I looked at us in the mirror, we both looked the same. I literally couldn't see the difference.

I think it's a mind thing, and you have to spend a little time convincing yourself that you are no longer in those large sizes anymore. At my worst a few years ago, I was a size 28/30, sometimes up to a 30/32 in underwear. After doing a pre-op diet in readiness for my GB op (which never materialised), I got down to a size 22 and could even squeeze into a size 20 in jeans. Still big but to me it was amazing as I never thought I'd get into clothes that 'small' (for me) ever again. I still felt in my mind that I was having myself on and still looked at stuff in a minimum size 28, as I simply couldn't see any change, despite others telling me I'd lost loads of weight. I just thought they were being nice to me to spur me on.

I really do think it's a case of mind over matter and needing to believe in yourself that you have done it and really are getting slimmer, and are not always going to be 'the big one' as you may have come to regard yourself as in the past.

Good luck for further reductions

 

[emergingbutterfly]

I too have no idea what size I am and recently I ordered a jumper dress which was a bargain price and thought that I would wear it for Christmas day and it was a goal. However, the dress arrived and it fits me but I am sending it back cos I consider myself too big to wear this style.

So I can completely relate to what you are saying. I guess it takes a while for our heads to catch up

 

[Mixman]

At less than half the weight I used to be and fit easily into XL clothes, I still think I'm an overweight guy.

Hopefully in time, it will pass, but our heads don't move as quick as the weight does.

Keep up the fantastic work and look forward to hearing what your students say on your return

 

[Nightwitch]

i too dont truly know what size clothes i should be buying...i used to buy size 30/32 tops for work, wear 2x/3x tshirts i used to buy from concerts (when i could find them in those sizes)....i now buy size 22 tops from ASDA!!!

as for bottoms/skirts...still got no idea as i bought all mine from an american website called HolyClothing...nice elasticated waists and drawstrings hehe...used to buy 4/5x size but am now pulling in the 2/3x as tight as i can, i know i can fit into the L/XL but i feel it's a little too snug on my hips still, need to lose a couple more inches there lol
thin i need to start going out and trying things on soon to find out what size i am again lol

I still see a large person in the mirror and in my head, though now i have almost lost 100lbs i have al my friends saying it is really noticable what i have lost tho i still don't think i see what they do....oh well give it time hehe

 

[gaelic girl]

I think i'm finally beginning to believe i'm thinner but it's taken a while. As i dropped the sizes i was a nightmare shopping as i still thought i had to shop in Evans. Once that passed i then didn't have a scooby what clothes to buy as i never had that choice before and it was too hard. Now a size 12 i still have to say it a few times before i can actually pick up a hanger that says 12 on it. It's a great feeling but omg it takes a bit of getting used to ( but oh so happy that i can even say that) xx

 

[Grace]

I'm sorry if this sounds like whining, but I'm struggling with some head issues related to weight loss.

I'm a teacher and needed to get some 'back to school' clothes as the things I wore before the summer holidays are too big and were for a while before the end of term. I was wearing a 22 or a 20 and pulling things in at the waistbands with my life-line elasticated belt

Anyway, I thought I would get some size 18 clothes and be prepared to shrink into them. I went out this morning and found two skirts, a pair of trousers, two tops and a cardigan. Tried on 18s and found they were all too big. Bought everything in a 16, except the cardigan that I got in a 14 (ok, it's a loose style.)

This shouldn't be a problem. I should be whooping for joy that I've shrunk to this size. And in lots of ways, I am.

However, I felt quite panicked. When I look at myself in the mirror, I still look the same as I always did. I have no idea what size I am, what I look like or what shape I am.

I posted an update photo into my album today and I can see that I am smaller, but I still have a size 30 head.

When I paid for my clothes at the till, logic and sanity tells me that if I fit inside those clothes I must be smaller than the sales assistant. My brain tells me that she's looking at me and thinking "Who does she think she's kidding?"

Do other people experience this or have I got a real problem? How do you get through this?

Sorry this has been a bit long.

Gill
I believe this is called body dysmorphia. Anorexics have it a lot and from my bit of mini-research on here, big people have it too! I have it the other way round and see myself as size 10/12 even though I'm size 26. But as I begin to lose weight I am expecting it will become like your experience. Because basically I have NO IDEA what I look like. The mirror does not speak the truth, and photos of me come as a horrific shock.

I believe there are some very good books out there on body image.
I have a very, very dear friend who is just overcoming severe (life-threatening) anorexia. When I see her on Friday I will ask her as it as her who told me about these books..to get some recommendations.
I'll pass them on as soon as possible as long as that doesn't break any site rules.

Charis xx

oh and by the way.........HUGE CONGRATULATIONS on getting into size 16!
:553::553::553::553::553::553::553::553::553::553::553::553::553::553:

 

[StephieAck]

I totally understand what you mean.
You see, I KNOW that Im a size 12/14, I KNOW I am, I only have to look at my clothing labels to know that, and I look at my body and physically do see massive changes, but there is a huge difference in intellectuality knowing that you are a new you and in emotionally knowing it.
I personally am constantly expecting to wake up and find out that this is all a dream and that I am still a size 26!!! Every time I pick up my size 12 jeans or dress I stare at them with disbelief and never believe that they will even go over my ankles!!! lol
Our brains are a funny old thing and I seriously dont think that anything that anyone says will ever make it any easier, we just have to give our brains time to adjust and hope that one day they catch up.
Well done on doing so well xx
Steph xx

P.S I ALWAYS expect that look of 'yeah yeah fatty, keep dreaming' when I buy my new smaller clothes.

 

[ravelling]

It's good to know that it's not just me.
I guess it is a kind of body dysmorphia.

I sometimes look at my fattest photos now and think that I had no real idea of exactly how big I had got. I didn't think of myself as freakishly large even when size 30 started to get a bit tight.

If I had had true insight into what I really looked like, would I have been so accepting of my fat? I don't know.

I think I've had this issue all my life. When I was 17 I weighed 11 stones and thought of myself as enormously fat. I look back at pictures of that time in my life as a bit wasted as there were so many things I didn't do as I felt crippled by being 'so fat'!

 

[Grace]

It's good to know that it's not just me.
I guess it is a kind of body dysmorphia.

I sometimes look at my fattest photos now and think that I had no real idea of exactly how big I had got. I didn't think of myself as freakishly large even when size 30 started to get a bit tight.

If I had had true insight into what I really looked like, would I have been so accepting of my fat? I don't know.

I think I've had this issue all my life. When I was 17 I weighed 11 stones and thought of myself as enormously fat. I look back at pictures of that time in my life as a bit wasted as there were so many things I didn't do as I felt crippled by being 'so fat'!

me too! I thought I was HUGE at size 14! But at size 26 I had a massive breakthrough moment one day when I realised that I was more often than not, I was the fattest person in the room! Not a happy realisation, but a necessary one to get me motivated to do something about it!

 

[thinnerangela]

You're not alone!!

I've lost over 13 st - I still think I'm enormous but when I WAS a size 32/34 I didn't think I was too bad!!

If it wasn't for my daughter I'd still be picking up a 14 - shes been making me see a 10 in some things is OK - not all still need a 14 in trousers with waistbands!!

If I hadn't lost my bottom wouldn't even be able to look at them and they fit now with no gappy waists!!

Body image is a real problem!!

Angela xx

 

[jaxx]

I'm still looking at clothes that are waay to big for me and I'm reluctant to leg go of my super sized clothes in case I need them again for some reason.

Every time I pick up my size 24 jeans, I automatically assume they won't fit over my hips at all and yet they're too big on me now.

I also suffered from the 'it's not that bad' syndrome when I was a size 30/32. My mum also had it with regards to my size etc she knew I was overweight but didn't think it was that extreme but put into prospective it's dangerous etc. Now I'm 8 stone lighter and still considered over weight it's easier to see how bad I had got.

I go into shops looking for clothes and pick up size 24's and put them back thinking they'll not fit me. I also can't get out of the 'must shop at Evans' mind set. I can't believe that there are actually clothes out there that will fit me that I can buy from shops that aren't Evans. I also don't know what size I actually am.

 

[BlueDiamond]

Hi peeps.

When I am out with my D/H my only "worries" if you can call it that is that I think ppl are looking at me and thinking " gosh look at the size of her" I dont think they are looking coz I may look nice or wearing something nice, just assume they think I am dressed inappropriotly for my size, or I compare myself to other ladies and say to me D/H " am I as big as that" ............ I know I am smaller as I gone from size 26 to an 18.......

All the best - MeJulie x x

 

[ravelling]

I must admit, I am driving my husband and son mad asking them "Am I bigger than her/him?".
It probably sounds as though I'm simply looking for flattery all the time, but I honestly have no idea!

 

[CCPM]

Thats it in a nutshell you just don't know who or what you are anymore. I constantly look at things and think no way jose not for me then I try it and its often too big. It sjust adjusting your head ....its so difficult bit lovely at the same time

M

 

[luscious_peach]

I had an amazing breakthrough this last weekend.

I went dress shopping with 2 of my sisters-in-law for a wedding coming up in September. I am now a size 14 (which was my original goal - couldn't imagine being smaller than that). We gathered approx 30 dresses between us and hit the changing rooms. Both my SILs picked size 12s and mine were 14s. Every single dress that I put on looked amazing and my SILs kept calling me a ***** haha. I never thought it would happen but they were jealous of the way I looked - cos I looked good (both of them have very straight figures and I still have curves).

But best of all, I also tried on their dresses in the size 12, and they looked good on me too - even a bit sexy. One was a real revelation, a short black dress, tight with zips, very sexy and it looked amazing (I would never wear it, way too risque for me) but for a mo I felt like the sexiest girl alive. I couldn't believe that it was me in the mirror.

So anyway, I can now see how shopping can become a replacement addiction! No, only joking, but I have had to do some serious shopping, I literally had 2 pairs of jeans and 3 tshirts that fit me lol.

I hope that you all can have a wonderful experience as I have xxx

 

[dottychic]

What a great feeling I bet you are going to feel so damn good at this wedding, and Im sure you will look it too, looking forward to the photos x

 

[Chuffy_29]

The head thing is tricky, when i managed to get to a size 12/14 before i didn't realise it..sounds stupid but didn't know what was right...when i look back at the one pair of jeans i kept from that time i can not believe i was that small..i certainly didn't realise then! I guess it will get easier as time goeas by and settle in to your new shape.