Just cant get my head around it

[fatbutnot4eva]

If I could swear thats how this post would start.

arghhhhh (thats a bit better)

just need to get this out of my head so I will warn you its a load of drovvel -

I had my band 11th January
Lost 10lb pre op diet
since then have lost 9lb - yes thats right just 9lb

I had my fill almost 2 weeks ago 2ml (I was told I woudl have 5ml but they put 2ml in and said it was enough) I was full after eating for 1 day and that was it I am now pretty much eating what I like.

I can eat bread, meat, pasta, french stick (only tiny bit but can still eat it) for tea last night I ate over half a plate which is more than I would have thought I could I got a pain half way through so stopped my husband looked over at me and "said stop your suppost to stop when you feel full, I took a sip of my nas - i know i am not suppost to drink at the same time but the pain you get makes you need a drink. He looked at me got all annoyed and that was it no speaking for the rest of the night. FFS I am trying my best and feel like I am failing already. I phoned to speak to my dietician yesterday after he left me a message and hey he's not in so I have to call back another day.
I know that it wasnt gonna be easy but this is as bloody hard as any diet that I have been on before, and when i was told once its off its gone no, i weight myself one day i have lost a couple of pound a day or two later i have put it back on.

The amounts that I am eating are much less than before the op - bloody hell my plate used to be bulging at the seams so the band is doing something but I just thought it would do more. I am soo impatient and thats not helping, also having a husband that i can see thinks i would have been thinner by now also isnt doing much for me.

I am either doing it all wrong or this band isnt working properly yet. I though before i had it woohoo band in january god I am gonna be able to wear a swimming costume when i go away in june but the chances of that happening are along way away now.

I keep in contact with a girl who had a bypass the same day i had my band and she has lost soo much I am chufed to bits for her but I dont think she is doing anything different to what I am doing.

Sorry for moaning and if you got this far sorry again



Helen
x

 

[cah-ching]

Just wanted to offer hugs :hug99: I'm sorry it isn't working for you x May be in time it will x

 

[Glenville]

Honey, I think you should really be a bit more patient. What I am going to say is meant as constructive criticism. You did loads of research pre-op weighing up the bypass and band and you will have found that the band takes a lot more work on your behalf and takes longer to get going because of finding the sweet spot. I can only guess at how hard it must be to see others here losing weight "out of the blocks" and you still struggling.

However, you are not making life easy for yourself by sabotaging your efforts. Why would you want to drink while eating? You are not going to get that full feeling by flushing everything through your pouch. All you are doing is making everything you eat into sliders.

Everyones weight goes up and down, even for bypassers. Just get hubby to hide the scales if you get so disheartened by the fluctuation. I am used to my weight going up and down and it doesn't worry me so much as it used to. I know that the weight WILL come off in the long term, it is just a case of being patient.

It sounds like your OH is really trying to help you, please give it a chance and BE PATIENT. xx

 

[archiesmum]

Hi fbn4e. I have posted a reply on 2bands for you. I don't know how to move it or quote it. Silly me.

 

[LBD]

Helen

I feel for you BUT I think you are being impatient. As I have said before my surgeon kept telling me over and over that I will probably not lose weight for several months until the band is at the correct restriction for me.

I think you are expecting too much too soon. You have only had one fill - sometimes it takes 3 or 4 before you get anywhere near what is right for you. The bariatric team will be playing safe and just filling a tiny bit at a time.

We know the band isn't an easy miracle cure. It takes work and patience and is completely different to the bypass. You shouldn't compare yourself to bypassers hun.

Stick to the bandster rules and you will be fine but you must remember this is a marathon and not a sprint!

Don't forget - you have lost weight.

Keep your chin up, it will get better x

 

[fatbutnot4eva]

Thanks to you

John you are right 100% I need to stop thinking of it all in one go this is so new to me it is really hard to change BUT I will.
Its the thought of failing that scares me more the thought that i need more than the band.
LBD - I know you have said it before and I even told my hubby what you had said, I will try really hard.
archies mum - gonna have a read now.
Thanks again it really means alot that I can come on here and you all help soo much x

 

[LBD]

I have pinched this from a different site but thought it might be helpful:-

What to expect in the first year with a band
So many bandsters feeling despondent in the early months of being banded, even brandishing themselves failures!

For most a pre-op diet is recommended and consequently most enjoy some weight loss, then in the 7-10 days following surgery another good weight loss is usually enjoyed as restriction is felt due to stomach swelling after the op. Some 3lbs some as high as 16lbs – all depending I suspect on our starting weight and pre-band eating habits. Most people seem to get their appetite back by 2 weeks post op so and weight loss consequently either seems to grind to a halt or even we regain some of the weight we lost. Yes there are the very disciplined/lucky or maybe the higher starting BMI’s who continue to lose after 2 weeks but they appear in the minority to me?

So in most cases we have 4 more weeks to wait for our first fill (some NHS patients have 10 more weeks to wait) Its all very well for the dieticians to give us a post op diet to follow but lets be honest here whilst it’s a fantastic plan of course to eat as healthily as possible lets not forget that its continuous diets that got us fat in the first place. I have been on a diet for over 20 years and I don’t know about anyone else but I just got FATTER!

I read of members joining WW or SW and if that works for them that’s fabulous but for me I have done WW etc more than 20 times and if it worked for me, if I could be a success on a diet then I wouldn’t have ever considered WLS! Long term success with a band stems from reduced quantity and satiety training not doing another diet!

So we have to get through these 4-10 weeks whilst waiting for our first fill without feeling like a failure –that’s not easy I know because I'm currently going through it, yes I'm eating a lot less than I ever ate pre-op but obviously not enough to continue losing as I'm still at the same weight I was 1 week post-op. I'm not disappointed though as this is EXACTLY what I expected and it’s what everyone should EXPECT! If your expectations are realistic then you won’t be frustrated when things don’t go according to some weight loss plan you have hatched that had you in a size 10 by Christmas! LOL

At last the day comes for our first fill we have been waiting for it like Christmas morning but again we must be patient as the very large majority of bandsters don’t feel adequate restriction after their first fill. We mustn’t feel despondent we must accept and fully grasp the concept that most bandsters don’t reach their “sweet spot” until their 3rd, 4th or 5th fill. If you’re having private fills this gets you to approximately 4 or 5 months post-op, if you’re having NHS fills this could be as much as 12 months post-op.

Then of course you have to allow time to lose the weight, lets just say this could take another 12-18 months so before you know it your goal weight is 2 years away. This seems like an inordinate amount of time to wait but the statistics show that 18 months - 2 years is the average time to goal so there is little point expecting to reach goal before then and if we do then whoopee dooo darrr that’s a great bonus but if we are average or a little longer than average that’s whooooppeee doo darrr too because I bet it sure took a lot longer than 2 years to gain all that excess weight in the first place so what’s the rush?

 

[LBD]

..and another....

The bandster rules!
Fear of losing the Weight Loss Battle

You won't lose the battle if you are willing to work with the band and do Your part But I can almost guarantee:

·You will have plateaus when you first switch to solids until your body gets used to being fed instead of starved.

·During many plateaus you will lose inches not lbs and finally a larger loss.

·Your loss in the first 30-40 days is a never to be repeated experience so enjoy it Then you begin the long slow journey downward (not upward)

·You will learn the fine art of PB's and what causes them for you is it swallowing air when you eat. Eating too fast.. Not chewing well or too big a bite.. Eating the wrong food for you...and not recognizing the no longer hungry after 1/2 cup (satiation) versus I want to eat more cause I can or it tastes good or I crave (head hunger).

·You will watch your body shrink and will walk a bit taller literally and figuratively... Start slipping into booths in restaurants. Sit in chairs with arms .. Stop worrying about how strong the chairs are...Not having to ask for an extender belt on airlines.. Finding it is easier to and you have more energy to walk / go up stairs/ Clean house and do a million other day to day activities ... Slip in and out of bath tubs where the water goes all the way around you instead of damming up and it doesn’t kill you to stand up from sitting on the floor ...Wipe yourself easily in the bathroom.. Watch the years fall off your face and drivers license picture .. Go to a restaurant and order an appetizer and still end up with leftovers to take home..

·Go through doubts and several fills/defills until you hit the sweet spot fill level for you.

·Will have to stop several times along the way to reassess your eating habits (I could eat certain foods and get away with some cheating a bit quantity wise at 359 and still lose .. That had to go at 250)

·I have also found that I have to keep reminding myself 1/2 cup of solids 3 times a day only and drink my water (1 hour after meals until the next meal but not with meals)

·Eat Protein first ..Fruit and veggies second and non-complex carbs last. (Keep the fats, sugars and non-complex carbs low ..Still have them but keep em low).

And believe it or not a plateau that indicates that you need a fill is

1.No weight loss for 4 weeks.

2.You are following all the band rules (8 times out of 10 we want to be able to break the rules and still lose.figuring if we get a fill it will miraculously start us losing without us having to do our part).

3.You are eating foods that are hard and stick in your band for the 3-4 hours not drinking your calories- You are hungry an hour after eating (really hungry not cravings) and the 1/2 cup doesn't stay in the band for 2 1/2 to 4 hours.

4.You are drinking your 60+ Fl oz water a day and not drinking with your meal or for at least an hour after.

5.Once you move from mushies to solids.. As much as possible get your nourishment from food that is solid. If you have problems with it sticking in your stoma.try it again chewing it well..Cutting it up finer or chewing it with other foods to keep it from recombining in your pouch and forming a plug (e.g. potatoes)..

6.Try to avoid soups and or protein drinks if possible (if you are able to eat your protein you will be full longer - some people have tight bands in the morning and cant eat so have a protein drink)
7.Whenever you hit a plateau.. Keep a food diary and log everything, including water, which goes in and measure the 1/2-cup of solids. Mine grew twice from 1/2 to almost a cup without my noticing lol.

8.Try weighing in once a week to begin with not daily. Later move to once every 2 weeks or once a month. When you are losing slowly weight fluctuates daily with hydration levels etc. At least this way you normally will see a loss and not a fluctuate on or gain. Yes the loses are smaller but they are down not up.

9.Measure yourself monthly ..Often you lose inches before you lose lbs.

10.Don’t compare yourself to others.. We all lose at different rates based on age/metabolism/food choices/ activity level.. But we can all lose

 

[cazbandy]

I eat more than half a cup....and it's not done me harm.

It not the quantity per se, it the nutrional value that counts.

Low fat, high protein, low carbs. Less sugar.

Thats my rules.

I never eat more than a chicken breast sized portion of meat (or egg), I will have 1-2 tablespoons veg and maybe 1 tablespoon carbs for an evening meal.

Lunch, I have an egg or matchbox sized piece of cheese, with a bowl of soup.

breakfast (never skip this) I have a slimfast shake and a muller light (fat free) with a melba toast.

Thats my quantities...ish.

 

[fatbutnot4eva]

Lisa Thank you very much how helpful is that and it all makes sence
thansk very much have copied it and pasted it into my emails as a reminder x

 

[Mazza]

Hi Helen

You have allready had some excellent advice from John and Lisa. Remember hun patience is a virtue! Stick to the rules and you will fine x

 

[cah-ching]

I have pinched this from a different site but thought it might be helpful:-

What to expect in the first year with a band
So many bandsters feeling despondent in the early months of being banded, even brandishing themselves failures!

For most a pre-op diet is recommended and consequently most enjoy some weight loss, then in the 7-10 days following surgery another good weight loss is usually enjoyed as restriction is felt due to stomach swelling after the op. Some 3lbs some as high as 16lbs – all depending I suspect on our starting weight and pre-band eating habits. Most people seem to get their appetite back by 2 weeks post op so and weight loss consequently either seems to grind to a halt or even we regain some of the weight we lost. Yes there are the very disciplined/lucky or maybe the higher starting BMI’s who continue to lose after 2 weeks but they appear in the minority to me?

So in most cases we have 4 more weeks to wait for our first fill (some NHS patients have 10 more weeks to wait) Its all very well for the dieticians to give us a post op diet to follow but lets be honest here whilst it’s a fantastic plan of course to eat as healthily as possible lets not forget that its continuous diets that got us fat in the first place. I have been on a diet for over 20 years and I don’t know about anyone else but I just got FATTER!

I read of members joining WW or SW and if that works for them that’s fabulous but for me I have done WW etc more than 20 times and if it worked for me, if I could be a success on a diet then I wouldn’t have ever considered WLS! Long term success with a band stems from reduced quantity and satiety training not doing another diet!

So we have to get through these 4-10 weeks whilst waiting for our first fill without feeling like a failure –that’s not easy I know because I'm currently going through it, yes I'm eating a lot less than I ever ate pre-op but obviously not enough to continue losing as I'm still at the same weight I was 1 week post-op. I'm not disappointed though as this is EXACTLY what I expected and it’s what everyone should EXPECT! If your expectations are realistic then you won’t be frustrated when things don’t go according to some weight loss plan you have hatched that had you in a size 10 by Christmas! LOL

At last the day comes for our first fill we have been waiting for it like Christmas morning but again we must be patient as the very large majority of bandsters don’t feel adequate restriction after their first fill. We mustn’t feel despondent we must accept and fully grasp the concept that most bandsters don’t reach their “sweet spot” until their 3rd, 4th or 5th fill. If you’re having private fills this gets you to approximately 4 or 5 months post-op, if you’re having NHS fills this could be as much as 12 months post-op.

Then of course you have to allow time to lose the weight, lets just say this could take another 12-18 months so before you know it your goal weight is 2 years away. This seems like an inordinate amount of time to wait but the statistics show that 18 months - 2 years is the average time to goal so there is little point expecting to reach goal before then and if we do then whoopee dooo darrr that’s a great bonus but if we are average or a little longer than average that’s whooooppeee doo darrr too because I bet it sure took a lot longer than 2 years to gain all that excess weight in the first place so what’s the rush?

This is quite frankly an excellent post!

 

[phatmomma]

I feel so sorry for you. How many times people compare weight losses on here, and you always think you won't but its not easy to feel hard done by...

But as John says you know what to do and what not to do and drinking with meals is a no no for banders and bypassers alike....

Stick with it, you know you have the determination, call yesterday your glitch, now get back on your horse and ride off to slimmerville xx

 

[Dawn36]

You really have my sympathy. As you know I had a bypass, I am still on soft foods and haven't lost anything since week 2! All I can do is offer my support, you can and you will do this. Stick to the rules, and I know it is easy for me to say, but be patient. It is gonna work.

 

[archiesmum]

Hi fbn4e. Ha ha I'm posting in the right place this time!! You mentioned not eating breakfast. Well to be honest I can't face food in the morning so I have a slimfast or whey protein shake which normally sees me thru' to lunchtime. While I was on holiday I had a banana and yogurt whizzed together which was also ok. Hope this helps.

 

[thinkbethin]

Hang on in there Helen. Your weight will drop when your body is ready to let go. I am having NO weight loss at the minute and have'nt done for weeks but I'm just thinking what Lisa has posted about the 18 month to 2year time scale that we are all told about. Even now 9 months post op I'm still learning how and what to eat so you're not alone sweetheart.xxxxx

 

[Bullyfun]

keep it in your mind, you will lose it, but you have to help.
I have also now stalled and not due a fill till 13th march, trying not to be obsessed with the scales and now moved onto mushies as I was frankly sick of liquid, spoke to hospital who said if you feel ready go for it.
I too want the magic wand, I too want to be an adonis on the beach in June, I too WANT IT NOW........ lol
But I too know it isnt going to happen over night, unlike diets this time its off for ever, so when it goes however long it takes its gone for good.
sooooo the long and short of it hun stick to the rules, stop sabotaging yourself with bad thoughts and doubts and keep sharing your down times with us so we can give you a hug followed by a kick up the arse xxx

 

[Bullyfun]

I take it all back....... must have some morning restriction, tried scrambled runny egg this morning.....2 mouthfulls felt like i was choking then a sprint to the loo....... shan't be trying that again for a while.......

 

[Glenville]

Wow Bully, your new photo is amazing! Well done you.

 

[Lostinmy30's]

Yeh Bully was wondering who the hottie was lol


FBN4EVA.....c'mon babe..you can do it I know you can