New, petrified..anyone been to St Thomas?

[tiili]

Hi all,

I was referred by my gp in April, and have now finally received a letter from St Thomas asking me to come in for consultation with Dr. Oben. Lots of emotions going on...not helped by the fact that I am also scared of doctors and hospitals.

Has anyone been to St Thomas and can tell me what to expect? Is this a group thing or do everybody get individual appointments? How many people do you need to see and talk to? Has anybody ever had Dr Oben? I' not sure if he also does the surgery or if he is just a consultant.


It says in my letter that if a referral is made for surgery I may be asked to do a pre-op assessment on the same day. Is that normal? I would have assumed that pre-op assessments should be done close to the surgery, not this early on in the process?

I am so scared of all this...it would help if I knew what to expect. From reading the forums here it seems all hospitals have their own procedures in terms of appointments etc.

Thank you in advance

 

[tiili]

Nobody?

 

[SleeveGirl]

Hi all,

I was referred by my gp in April, and have now finally received a letter from St Thomas asking me to come in for consultation with Dr. Oben. Lots of emotions going on...not helped by the fact that I am also scared of doctors and hospitals.

Has anyone been to St Thomas and can tell me what to expect? Is this a group thing or do everybody get individual appointments? How many people do you need to see and talk to? Has anybody ever had Dr Oben? I' not sure if he also does the surgery or if he is just a consultant.

It says in my letter that if a referral is made for surgery I may be asked to do a pre-op assessment on the same day. Is that normal? I would have assumed that pre-op assessments should be done close to the surgery, not this early on in the process?

I am so scared of all this...it would help if I knew what to expect. From reading the forums here it seems all hospitals have their own procedures in terms of appointments etc.

Thank you in advance

Unfortunately I'm not at St Thomas, but I wish you the best of luck in your journey. xx

 

[tiili]

Thank you x

 

[Dinda]

Hi Tilli, just seen this thread! I had my bypass at St Thomas' in Jan 2012.
At the time all appointments were individual and not groups, although I know the dietitian a are working on support groups for pre and post op people (I might even be coming along to share my experience at one!!)
My surgeon was Mr Botha, at the time he was the only surgeon but they were looking to appoint another person because the waiting list was so long. Some patients were transferred to another hospital to get the list down (delicious Jaxx and a guy on here who's name escapes me at present - sorry!) they had sleeves and did very well.
I understand your nerves, even though I wanted the operation I had doubts even in theatre! It's natural to be scared - life after a bypass is (usually) much better though.

 

[tiili]

Thanks Dinda! So glad to hear from someone who's been there. My consultant is Dr. Oben. He's a consultant surgeon so I think he's just involved in the assessment stage but not sure. From what I have read about him he does do lots of gastric balloons at St Thomas though so not sure if maybe they placed me with him because they think that would be an option for me. Right now I'm overanalyzing everything, I guess I just have to wait and see!

How was the first meeting for you, if you don't mind me asking? My gp said I'll find out on the same day if I get the surgery or not, so how many people do you actually see and talk to before you get the decision? Are they nice...understanding? And how long did it take you from first appointment to actual surgery? I am so nervous, the thought of having to open up to strange people about all this (I am a very private person and find it very difficult to talk about such painful emotions), being weighed, examined, judged... I am so scared, ashamed, and emotional just at the thought of going through this. I will probably come off as a complete unstable nutcase at the assessment considering I'm crying just writing about it right now...

I know I have to do it though. Like my lovely gp kept saying - "it's a hurdle you have to get over, you can do it". Two weeks left.

 

[Dinda]

Firstly, don't worry about being judged at your appointment (massive hug!) you will be seeing professionals who do these operations all the time, changing people's lives for the better. You're on the way x this is an emotional time, you will have tried lots of things before a surgical option and they need to know that. Be open, be honest and you will get help. I remember being asked if I ever felt suicidal, I said 'no, but I wouldn't mind not being alive, or not waking up because this is no life' he basically told me off and said I had so much going for me, which was quite funny! I got a sense they cared.
One of the nurses looking after me post op had been banded by him and thought he walked on water! The nurse at my pre op was asking me all about it because she had struggled with her weight and was considering the op herself - you will find support in the strangest places!!
The surgeons do a variety of operations, Mr Botha did sleeves, bands and bypasses as well as being a cancer specialist (v talented man!) part of the assessment is about working out what is the right surgery for you. Look at your excess weight, your diet history and eating patterns before deciding with you on the best course of action. I had read 'weightloss surgery for dummies' (quite American but explains simply each option and what type of person it suits) so I went into the appointment saying I want a bypass because ..... And Mr Botha agreed (even though he later offered me a sleeve because he was in a rush, don't worry about that though!) if you don't want to buy it you can get it from the library. Go prepared, don't be passive and accept anything offered without knowing the alternatives and why a certain procedure is for you, this is your body and life.
My wait was fairly long, but all that seems to have changed so I wouldn't compare it. When you get on the list they will tell you how long it is now. It was more about booking out the theatre time as St T's is a busy hospital. Great views though!!

The one thing I would say is take a book or magazines with you, clinic times are always slow.

 

[tiili]

Thank you so much Dinda.... hugs xxx

 

[Dinda]

No worries Tiili, and if you want to practice talking to strangers about the procedure you can give me a call!

Every person on this site is or has been where you are now, our journeys might differ but we've all felt sad, frustrated, helpless, hopeless, scared and excited plus a million other emotions.

I look forward to reading about your happy ending!

 

[tiili]

...and now I started crying just because you are being so nice! Is there an off switch somewhere for all these emotions? It was much easier being numb xxx

 

[Dinda]

It isn't easier being numb, and you can't really be numb when in so much pain. People who've never experienced this would have no idea what it's like to be big/fat/obese/overweight or whatever word is in favour at present, how much strength and courage it takes to face every day with ignorant idiots judging you. You are stronger than you know, facing demons takes courage.

There will be ups and downs ahead, all of which will be natural. It's so strange trying to think back to what I felt like, it's only a year and a half (almost) since the op - it has gone in the blink of an eye, but I am so different. I'm happy and outgoing, I don't mind showing people the person I always was but never had the courage to be.

 

[PlayfullGenie]

Oh Tilli ((( hugs ))) bless you!

I'm not at St Thomas' but am right there with you on the seesaw of emotions ... being at the same stage of the WLS journey, I'm bizarrely not too concerned about the procedure/op! I'm more concerned with "dumping" afterwards *chuckle*

I did all my analysing/driving myself insane while going through cancer treatment - I realised that it was the fear of the unknown that really did my noodle in

Do let me know if I can support you in any way (phone / email / FB / however) xxxx

 

[PlayfullGenie]

PS I was surprised by how genuinely lovely, supportive and understanding my surgeon was when I met him 10 days ago ... most surgeons nowadays subscribe to the knowledge obesity is a disease, not a physical mark of lack of willpower or being a "lazy" person.

In fact, he was delighted that (a) my diet is much, much better than his - aside from my binge eating!, (b) I do much more at the gym than himself or my (very slim) GP

I am 100% certain that you will find them only too willing to support you! I'm also very big on finding a surgeon you trust & have a rapport with ((( hugs )))

Good luck, angel xx

 

[mazza141180]

Dinda I've just read this thread and burst into tears. Ty for being so lovely.

Sorry tilli, for hijacking your thread.
I'm waiting for my pre-op date at Walsall west mids x

 

[Dinda]

Now will you two just start behaving yourselves before Karlos the (not in the slightest bit) terrible notices me 'being nice'!!!

 

[PlayfullGenie]

*chuckle* at Dinda Mazza, hope you get your pre-op date soon soon soon xx

 

[mazza141180]

Weirdly after I posted this it came in the post, pre op 7th June, anaesthetist 18th June! So bloody close!!! Agghhh

 

[PlayfullGenie]

Ohhhhh Mazza - so close but how exciting!!!

 

[tiili]

Thank you all for being so lovely. I feel silly whining after having read your story Playfullgenie You seem like such a positive and strong person despite everything you've been through and here I am, having more or less given up on life for years and now sitting shaking at the thought of just going to the hospital for a consultation...

I wish I had started this journey earlier, when I was a bit stronger mentally...

Congrats on getting your date Mazza! xxx

 

[mazza141180]

I know I'm really nervous. I'm concentrating on losing weight at the mo as don't want any reason for them to say no!!

Tiili, we are all going through what you are hun so don't be worried about anything. That's what this place is for xxx