Question for neem

[hopelesscase]

Hi neem
A little off topic but relevent. I saw on one of the other threads that you have 2 autistic children. I have a 6ft 16yr old who is severly autistic with SLD at times can be very physical. He needs a lot of help with his personal care and has major sensory issues Luckly after being out of school for 2 years he is now in a specialist private school and very settled. My biggest worry is how long i will be out of action. I can get him into respite for a week when i eventually have my op do you think that will be long enough. I am a single parent but do have a 19yr old son around in the evenings as well.

 

[Neen]

Hiya , mine are 7 and 8 and one is pretty physical, however, nothing like what you have to deal with. My advice would be to go for as much respite as you can.I am not sure wether you had a band or bypass in mind , must remind myself, but a good two weeks would help I'm sure. I am about 5 weeks on now and feel pretty much back to normal. Bearing in mind we are all different, aside from the weight, I was told I was very healthy beforehand . Definately try to enlist the help of your other son as much as possible. Also friends and family around you , see if you can get them to help here and there. See if your autistic sons school will do him a social story about your operation, so he knows he must be gentle when you have had it done. Also maybe contact the National Autistic Society and chat to someone for advise, they may be able to help sort something out in terms of home support or extended respite. I wish you well love, and I know when the op is all done with, things will be much more manageable for you as you lose weight , all my love and hugs , Neen xxxx

 

[hopelesscase]

thanks neem thats been really helpful.
HCxxx

 

[lovebug]

Hi Neen, Can i ask u something. When u had your band fitted have you had times you have not lost a 1lb ?? sorry if u have already said ! it just my weight is fluctuating so much. I was down to 18.12 and now back to 19 and i dunno its playing with my head now ...i know that weight loss is not meant to be paramount in the 1st six weeks but i lost 11lb after the op on the 7th and went to the Clinic on the 12th and weighed 19st 2lbs and then over a few days after i was 19st and then went down to 18.12 and now back to 19. I also have a pain in my side on my port side when i breathe and its quite annoying now it wasn't there before . I have arranged my nurse to call me today because i need to have whats going on clarified and help with my head cus i feel down today !!!!!!!!!!!!! really down. Allicat has been so good bless her . I just started to worry and i can shift the worry now ! Help !! or if anyone else mightbe able too ?? Support needed to the lovebug ha ha !! i know somepeople will think oh shut up for god sake you have lost but mentally the losing weight was what keeps me "UP" and now its stopped i'm "Down" . Allicat told me to drink water because i have been bad at that . I have stuck rigourously to the eating plan sometimes maybe less than i should and i dunno....i just had to voice how i feel . xxxxx

 

[Alice]

Oh Livvy,

Sorry to hear you are struggling I agree with Ali that you should definitely be drinking more fluid. My clinic told me to aim for 2.5-3.5 litres a day (including soups etc). If you are dehydrated plus barely eating, your body will go into starvation mode and cling on to its fat and glycogen stores.

Also, stop weighing yourself so often! Go for once a week so you can see the real trend. Weight will always fluctuate from day to day - it doesn't tell you anything!

As for the pain: in my opinion, it could be your body telling you to slow down. You've been so active recently and pushing yourself maybe too hard. You're only 2 weeks post op!!

Stop being hard on yourself. You have achieved a MASSIVE weightloss in the past few weeks and have taken the most positive step you ever could do to lose the weight for ever. Focus on that and give yourself a break.

Alice xxx

 

[lovebug]

Hi Alice, oh i'm such a twat!! had a really bad wobble today, a baaaad one !! . I think a mixture of being tired and working so hard and all the change that is going on . Thanks soooo much for your post. Your right and also my nurse just called me and told me a few things maybe i never really realised so the pain i have is because now my swelling has gone down i can feel the muscle that the port is attached too and she told me to keep moving and eventually it will subside takes a long time for that muscle to get used to its new life long buddy !! and also my weight isn't much to do with the water aspect ...what i'm drinking is ok and will try and aim for a bit more till but i will retain water and not lose weight that fast at the moment because the food regime i'm on for the next 2-3 weeks is still based on liquids and puree's and the calorie intake from them is not enough for continued weightloss. My body has plateaued and eventually once i start to introduce more healthy calorific foods my body will get used to them again and then i'll have a fill and the weightloss will start because the food i'll be eating will be around 1000 calories ( at the moment its only about 500) and fill me up more and i won't just be using my own fat storage as i am now hence why the scales won't move now and fluctuate sooooo much!. Yes she told me not to bother weighing my self now in fact over the next few weeks i might put on a few lbs !! But once the fills start a more regular weightloss will occur. I feel a bit silly with what i posted because deep down i knew this but i think what we read and what really happens are 2 different things now were actually in the situation. So from today ....i'm not weighing myself only weekly and i'll start my walking later today and on Saturday i'm popping to my clinic because they say i should not be worrying about a thing and they want to see me again just to clarify and check me over again. I suppose in a way i'm someone who keeps things in and like i said to Ali this morning with the amount of money i have paid and the clinic i go to i should be relaying my worries more because thats how they will help me . So used to dealing with things in my own head and trying to see the positive side always , when things get a big low i wait until is gets so bad in my head i crack a bit under the strain. Just realised today there is no need too, i have support from you and others and i should use it more and get it out in the open. Sorry Neen for using your page !! if you can still offer your side would be nice to hear it xxx

 

[Alice]

you silly sausage lol (mmm sausage...)

Glad you are feeling happier and that you had such a helpful chat with your nurse. Its funny but everyone's clinic has different rules and advice for things. I guess that's normal and its good we can all share our own clinics advice and learn from each other.

Wow I can't believe you are only getting 500 cals a day! I was told to aim for 1200 while on the liquid diet but I've been managing about 800-1000. I was worried it wasn't enough but now I feel happier with it! I get my calories up with decaf latte's, smoothies and yoghurt... Maybe you could try something like that? Today I was worried I wasn't getting enough so I had a small glass of fresh squeezed OJ- 120 cals just like that!

Well done livvy and keep positive.

Alice xxx

PS - sorry Neem... X

 

[Neen]

Hiya gals , I answered this in your thread Livvy