split up with boyfriend this evening

[emergingbutterfly]

This has nothing to do with WLS as such but I just wanted to moan a little.

I have decided not to be a victim anymore and stop taking crap from people. I have been dating a guy for the past six months and whilst I have a deep connection with him and we get on very well, he also had issues with my size and I have known that he has been waiting for me to lose weight which has added to the pressue I have put on myself.

After a period of putting up with my wispy regrown new hair I decided today I was having a really trendy cut and when I told the dickhead in my life he made some comments about how my hair was one of the only attractive things about me and that shorter hair will make me look bigger and that I have gone and made things worse. I really had no idea he felt that way about my size. I knew he didnt like it but foolishly thought he had fallen in love with my personality.

I have decided that enough is enough. I have been through too much with my weight to continue to suffer. It has taken me a long time to build up my confidence and I cannot allow someone (no matter how much I love him) to knock me down.

When I had my hair cut today I thought I looked really great and he just made me feel like rubbish by his comments and now I have regretting my sassy new hairstyle.

So to cut a long story short, we have split up tonight and I really hope I have the strenght to stay away from the phone and not ring him or take his calls.

I am sorry for dumping this on here but I need to verbalise how bad this relationship would be for my ongoing journey and my sense of wellbeing.

 

[shelbell]

Massive hugs, it takes strength and courage to stand up for yourself. Rediscovering your confidence is a big part of weight loss and often it shows the true colours of those around us.

Sent from my iPhone using Forum Runner

 

[tranquil_butterfly]

Sending you big hugs:hug99:. Be strong.

tranquil x

 

[xxsarahxx]

Sounds like you've made the second best decision of your life hun, the first being your weight loss surgery. What a prat!! thank god you realised before he totally destroyed your new found confidence. What you want is someone that is gonna support you in your new life not hold you back and make you feel worthless because thats how they feel. i can honestly say that at a weight of 33 stone my hubby has never treated me with any disrepect towards my weight, in fact you would think i was a super model to hear him talk lol. You'll find that special someone soon enough and you'll feel like a million dollars when you do......the hurt will pass x

 

[Big an Bouncy]

Hun you do whats best for you,and he will be so sorry when he realizes what a div hes been.Perhaps he couldnt deal with the fact that you are changing.After all you wernt size 10, 6 months ago!

 

[blueeyes]

You know how much I care for you. I want nothing but the best for you and he certainly isn't it!

You have done AMAZINGLY well after your surgery, and you should be very proud. You're an inspiration to me, and I owe my own new life to you (and only you) as you have introduced me to WLS. You will do what's best for you, because that is what this surgery represents. A new beginning, a chance to start over with life. There are plenty of people on the sidelines, cheering you on and supporting you. Unfortunately, he's not one of them. It's becoming quite obvious now.

I don't want to b*tch about him, or waste any time talking about him really. I will say though, when people show you who they are, believe them!

Lots of love and hugs.

 

[xxsarahxx]

here here blueeyes x

 

[emergingbutterfly]

Thank you everyone. I know I have made the right decision and I can now re focus on my weight loss and hopefully continue to be a success

 

[cherry]

what a complete beeep!!!

your reply should have been ' sweetpea, if i wanted the opinion of a arsehole id have farted!'

hope your ok, im sending hugs xx

 

[xkimmie]

Oh my god can u imagine his face when you get to goal? And u have a sexy hunk on your arm with loads of confidence! He will be kissing the floor u walk on

 

[sugga]

Hoping too that you get the strengh to walk away and not turn back..you dont need this.
Im wishing you the best of luck with this, he doesnt deserve you but you will have to use all of your inner strengh to see this through and it will be hard. Huggs xxxx

 

[Deets]

thats one way of getting out of buying him a present (im only kidding )

Seriously, what a ******. My ex said something similar when i told him id had a fringe cut, i think it went something like, great im going to be going out with Dawn French

You dont need his sh*t hun, you are worth more than he'll ever know or appreciate. You really have been a brave bunny by getting rid. Takes some balls of steel and i applaud you.

I really wish you all the best hun x

 

[Bev]

You deserve better treatment than this precious... you have inspired many and have done brilliantly so far... I would say you deserve every ounce of encouragement and support...

If you feel that you would be better of redirecting your energy into you and your new life... then go for it...

This journey can be difficult enough without having partners adding to the strain...

So good luck to you and you know where we all are Angel.

Love and hugs as Always & Best Foot Forward for You xxx

 

[emergingbutterfly]

Thank you all for you support. I feel better. Once I lick my calorie free wounds I will kick ass and move on with my life, starting with the gym tomorrow morning

 

[sugga]

You have done amazing...gosh what a weight loss you must feel so different...brush yourself down and get going again...you are going to do really well for yourself and it will get easier in time....bless you. xxxx

 

[ruthw]

i cant tell how proud i am of you from afar good for you xxx

 

[emma ruth]

you deserve a hell of alot better than that stay strong love sending you hugs and kisses xxxxx

 

[Glenville]

I'm sorry to hear you've had to go through that Michelle. At least you know where you stand and it's probably for the best that you know now than later. You are doing so well and will continue to do so. Are you going to be at CX this coming Thursday? It would be nice to see you again. xx

 

[dottychic]

Well done hun, you are worth so much more than that! Stay strong and dont let him worm his way back into your affections (HUG) XX

 

[Denise Morris]

This guy sounds like a shallow self centred controlling s**t and that is someone every women could well do without.
Well done for giving him the elbow, somewhere out there is your perfect soulmate so don't give up.