Yve's Photo Diary - 4 years on

[Slimby50]

Wow... No words...u look like a different personxxx

 

[Llora]

Amazing not much else is needed to say. I know you worked hard to be where you are now! You look fantastic and ( i am sure ) feeling a lot better too!

 

[Yvessa]

2 YEARS AND 1 MONTH

2 YEARS AND 1 MONTH

 

[Butterfly_lady]

Look at those sexy legs

 

[ceecie74]

Blimey Yve you just keep looking better and better!! Well done!! X

 

[femfrankie]

WTG hun you look bloomin' marvellous

 

[Julcsi]

Wow. What a progress! Amazing!

 

[Yvessa]

Thanks everyone

 

[emma-louise]

Thanks everyone

Look at that trendy dress....I had a midi dress on yesterday it felt rather surreal walking out with it on.
Well done yvessa

 

[Bally]

Lovely, Yve!

 

[Yvessa]

Look at that trendy dress....I had a midi dress on yesterday it felt rather surreal walking out with it on.
Well done yvessa

I do find it hard wearing stuff like this. I feel very vulnerable, but a part of me wants to get over it and get used to it if that makes sense?

 

[ceecie74]

I'm so glad you said that Yve....I've started to feel vulnerable too, but can't pin point why. Do you have any thoughts on this yourself? X

 

[Yvessa]

I think a lot of it is down to acceptance hon. I know I used to think people didn't like me because I was fat, or I wasn't pretty because I was fat etc. And these sorts of clothes are what thinner people wear. So if I wear them and they don't look good then that's harder to take. And I was in a lot of denial about my size in terms of how big I actually looked and part of me already sees a bigger than size 12 girl in the mirror even though that's what I'm wearing. So I then think maybe I'm still really fat and I'm still that awkward child who looks stupid trying to wear trendy clothes. its like no longer having that shell of fat to protect you. Don't get me wrong, I never ever will go back. But it is a frightening hting.

 

[ceecie74]

Are you more critical about your body now than you were when you were bigger?

I'm feeling that I can't hide.....but I don't know what I'm hiding!!!!!

 

[Yvessa]

I am not so much more critical as such but more specific. Before I just was fat. Now I have distinct bits I hate and they're all I see.

 

[Crystalrainbow]

wowsers hunni your looking smoking hot can relate to the vulnerable bit, for me its for different reasons, but now not having that layer of fat to protect me is quite scarey, it take a little more confidence to pull it off.

 

[Yvessa]

Wow! Thank you

 

[Crystalrainbow]

Believe it a true inspiration x x x

 

[Yvessa]

Don't think I've ever been described that way lol. Thank you hon.

 

[femfrankie]

I think a lot of it is down to acceptance hon. I know I used to think people didn't like me because I was fat, or I wasn't pretty because I was fat etc. And these sorts of clothes are what thinner people wear. So if I wear them and they don't look good then that's harder to take. And I was in a lot of denial about my size in terms of how big I actually looked and part of me already sees a bigger than size 12 girl in the mirror even though that's what I'm wearing. So I then think maybe I'm still really fat and I'm still that awkward child who looks stupid trying to wear trendy clothes. its like no longer having that shell of fat to protect you. Don't get me wrong, I never ever will go back. But it is a frightening hting.

This is quite poignant for me right now Yve as Yep I mirror those feelings right now ..I have just returned from another shopping trip in asda. I went there solely to buy a couple of summery dresses or skirts under hubbies orders ... How did it go?? Well it didn't as I just don't feel ready?! Wtf?! How am I not ready? What the hell am I scared of?? And what feeble reason I did I give my husband for my failed trip .. I don't have proper shoes or sandals for my feet and I just wouldn't feel right walking our dog in a skirt?? I swear my head is screwy

Are you more critical about your body now than you were when you were bigger?

I'm feeling that I can't hide.....but I don't know what I'm hiding!!!!!

Ditto hun