Dealing with compliments....

[Wobbletogo]

...from people who don't know you've had surgery.

I had my first instance today where someone I haven't seen for a few months looked at me in shock and said "wow you've lost so much weight" I just nodded and grinned, and she came back with "well done, you must;ve worked really hard" and at that point I felt like a total fraud and was compelled to tell her the truth and nothing by the truth!

Has anyone else felt guilty about the way of losing weight, almost as if it's cheating and if so how have you handled the compliments you've got fro people who don't know about the surgery?

 

[mayamoo]

Dont feel guilty, you have worked hard, you made a hard, dangerous and life altering decision every day you make the right choices about food just as any person on a diet would. For those that don't know about mine I just say I'm eating low carb and hitting the gym 4-5 times a week (which I am) I deserve to be slim with the work I'm putting in, I just needed help off the starting block. Just smile and thank them for noticing xx

 

[Cicca]

...from people who don't know you've had surgery.

I had my first instance today where someone I haven't seen for a few months looked at me in shock and said "wow you've lost so much weight" I just nodded and grinned, and she came back with "well done, you must;ve worked really hard" and at that point I felt like a total fraud and was compelled to tell her the truth and nothing by the truth!

Has anyone else felt guilty about the way of losing weight, almost as if it's cheating and if so how have you handled the compliments you've got fro people who don't know about the surgery?

That's like feeling a fraud because you used patches to give up smoking or had therapy to stop drinking! It's a tool, hard work is still part of the deal!!

Sent from my iPhone using WLSurgery

 

[mayamoo]

Totally agree with cicca

 

[Yvessa]

I do agree with Cicca, but I do tell people. I don't feel ashamed of having the surgery, I needed it and was brave enough (finally) to address my food addiction and I will sing it from the rooftops. But I do think if I was trying to keep it secret I would feel horribly guilty.

 

[amanda577]

I told my colleagues at work before I went in and had the bypass and got a mixed reaction, but on the whole the majority of my colleagues don't think I've taken the easy way out at all.. They think I am really brave to have undergone dangerous, permanent life changing surgery, and when I went back yesterday for my first shift since my op, everyone was complimentary and just kept on telling me "well done"!! I also would feel really guilty if I tried to hide the fact. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Rather I feel proud of the fact that I had the sense to realise that I could not do this on my own and change my life, and that I needed help in the shape of a surgery tool, and in the old end it is still hard work and certainly no easy ride....

 

[shelleymarie]

I understand this because although I've told all my close friends, family and work colleagues (it's a small group of people who luckily all get on) there is of course people, more passing friends and acquaintances I haven't told, not keeping it secret just didn't make a big announcement but when the pounds started coming off fast a friend posted on Facebook to ask how I'm doing it (people are nosy aren't they? lol) I had a sudden urge to confess all, like it a big secret and I told her. She was really supportive and everyone has been but I do think the image of us who have wls portrayed by media has tainted my opinion of how others percieve us. When in reality most people either don't have an opinion or with a little education are very supportive of it all. So although I don't feel like I've cheated - far from it, feel like I went to hell and back before and for the first couple of months, and now work very hard with my tool to make sure it works, I'm am the sort of person that will explain to someone that I used a patch to give up smoking or this to help aid me lose weight. Not sure how It will go in the future but I'm hoping I will adopt a proud approach at making such a difficult decision and working so hard to make sure it is works for me

 

[Yvessa]

I am very open with people who ask me and many people honestly don't realise that you still have to diet. Many thing that we can't eat cakes or sweets because it will make us sick and our stomachs stop us eating. I think to some extent we have the opportunity and responsibility to educate and inform people around us.