feeling sad, just need to offload :-(

[Red 42]

Hi Folks

this isn't WL related but just need to offload a little :cry:

My Sister gave birth to her 3rd baby last Tuesday, a beautiful little girl to add to her two other offspring, both lovely children age 6 & 3. Unfortunately, she's married to a guy who really doesn't appreciate her or his kids and has a 'relationship' with the bottle. New Year is always difficult and as expected this one has been no different even though the new baby arrived last week (I some how thought he might behave )
My parents have been there for every birth and to give her support, and are still there as she has a touch of post natal depression. Mum has just briefly called me whilst they were out to let me know their plans and update me on the situation.

I'm not in the least surprised at how things are, but it tears me apart that my Sister lives with this situation, and that I can't help (we live almost 300 miles apart) I can't get down to visit yet with being only 3 weeks post op and back at Uni next week :cry: sorry to offload but I just can't stop crying.

 

[Caren]

awwww bless your heart i know it hurts watching someone you love go through this, but it will only stop when she chooses to stop it. Also you're only 3 weeks out so need to take care of yourself, at least she has your parents support Maybe you could give her a ring and have a sisterly chat, like you do As long as she knows you'll always be there theres nothing really that you can do, chin up cherry drop xxx

 

[angiemason]

it's very sad but i'm sure she knows you would support her if you could, your parents sound like they are great and i'm sure you will get to see her as soon as you are able. Try to keep your chin up it's easy to get down after an op and she wouldn't want you to do that either send her texts with lots of kind words and she'll know you're thinking of her xx take care

 

[Mrs Quiggle]

Angies right. Lots of calls and texts to let her know you are thinking of her. It's so hard when all around family can see problems within a relationship but the person involved doesn't accept them. Just be there for her when things get worse, that's all you can do lovely.

Kate x

 

[Red 42]

Thanks ladies x

I know I'm just not myself atm, and vowed several years ago to try not to worry so much about her as she is an adult and it's her choice to stay with him (they've been married 11 years, and he was like this when she met him) She's just worth so much more than this, she's clever, funny, got a brilliant mind...but he's just dragging her down.

I have a wonderful husband of 20 years and want her to have the same :sigh:

 

[wizzbang]

Try not to worry about her so much..... you will make yourself poorley!! Your mum and dad are doing everything they can to help your sister. She has made her decisions in life, has three beautiful babies and supporting family (you and your mum and dad) she must want to be with her husband, so presumably she is content, apart of course from the post natal depression that is quite common and she should soon recover from it.
Please try not to worry, worry about yourself for a change and then you can move forward properly.
Lynne xx

 

[Ruthiep]

I agree. No one knows what goes on behind closed doors. We can't live in someone else's marriage. You can only offer support and tell her you're there for her. You can't fix things for her.

I'm an NCT breastfeeding counsellor and it's in a strange way, not so different. I can only help those who want to be helped.

 

[Raynebubble]

Oh bless you hun, Big Rayne hug coming your way xx
the best thing you can do is let you siser know that you are on the end of the line any time she needs to chat. She will see sense one day xxx

 

[Red 42]

thanks all x x

I know that it's got to be her decision to do something about the relationship, and they must have their moments of getting on together otherwise there wouldn't be 3 children :flirt2: She knows I'm here for her, as this isn't the first time this has kicked off...I'm just a worrier and a bit of a mother hen when it comes down to it

Hubby and I are hoping to get down for a day or two the week after next.

thanks again x

 

[wizzbang]

Lovely, well try to look forward to it so you can ENJOY it rather than worrying about it and spoiling it for yourself. You will all hopefully have a lovely time then.
Lynne x
PS I want a baby too...... nothing on the cards yet with my daughter though and shes 40 already!

 

[Jen1961]

Its probably harder with you being so far away. She knows you are thinking of her and would be there for her if she needed your help. Keep letting her know how much you care and you are always there if she needs to chat xxxx I wish I had a lovely sister to share my troubles with

 

[Andy1968]

Hi Folks

this isn't WL related but just need to offload a little :cry:

My Sister gave birth to her 3rd baby last Tuesday, a beautiful little girl to add to her two other offspring, both lovely children age 6 & 3. Unfortunately, she's married to a guy who really doesn't appreciate her or his kids and has a 'relationship' with the bottle. New Year is always difficult and as expected this one has been no different even though the new baby arrived last week (I some how thought he might behave )
My parents have been there for every birth and to give her support, and are still there as she has a touch of post natal depression. Mum has just briefly called me whilst they were out to let me know their plans and update me on the situation.

I'm not in the least surprised at how things are, but it tears me apart that my Sister lives with this situation, and that I can't help (we live almost 300 miles apart) I can't get down to visit yet with being only 3 weeks post op and back at Uni next week :cry: sorry to offload but I just can't stop crying.

Sending a massive :hug99:
xx

 

[cu16]

Hope everything works itself out. My sister and I are also 300 miles apart so I know I would feel the same as you. I agree with others Text her phone her just let her know you are there the rest well only your sister can change but there is nothing like knowing you have someone there for you x x

 

[BlueDiamond]