Scared About Docs

[Pinky2009]

Hello,

Im new to this forum but found it while searching gastric bypass and thought i could do with some help.

So my dad is very big and i have always been aswell, im only 18 and im getting to the point where i just want to be normal, im 18 years old yet i hate walking ( because i get out of breath quickly and find it embarrasing) ive had problems with my knees and my ankles give way if i walk too far.

I just want to live a normal life that every other 18 year old girl does, i put on a smile everyday and pretend im the happy go lucky girl but deep down im always thinking about being the fat one. I dont like going anywhere new incase people stare at me or lads laugh at me and call me names.

Sounds silly but im just getting so depressed, Me and my friends wanna organise a girls holiday but the first thing im thinking is i dont want to swim because i hate being in a costume .. it shouldnt be like that.

Anyway i have booked a docs appointment for 17th march as thats the earliest i could get with my doctor but i am so scared about beiing weighed and talking about my weight it scares me so much.

Im 5ft9 and weigh about 22 stone .. awful i know.

My dad is in the process of his gastric bypass and wants me to have one as well.

Any advice?

Thanks guys
xxx

 

[j.u.s.t.l.i.z.]

is your dad a private or nhs patient ? have u tried all other aspects of weight loss ? would a bypass be right for your eating habbits? i am a bander.

let us know a little more about u hun, we are here to help and support you

liz xx

 

[tendersage]

Hi am welcome to mini, the bypass seems scarey like every other surgery but is not. You should prepare a list of things you want to say to the Dr, and also look into the NICE guidelines plus your PCT requirements so you can be prepared and in this way point out to the Dr you are not doing this on a whim. Explain to them how you feel as well this also will halp

 

[lesleyweb]

Hello,

Im new to this forum but found it while searching gastric bypass and thought i could do with some help.

So my dad is very big and i have always been aswell, im only 18 and im getting to the point where i just want to be normal, im 18 years old yet i hate walking ( because i get out of breath quickly and find it embarrasing) ive had problems with my knees and my ankles give way if i walk too far.

I just want to live a normal life that every other 18 year old girl does, i put on a smile everyday and pretend im the happy go lucky girl but deep down im always thinking about being the fat one. I dont like going anywhere new incase people stare at me or lads laugh at me and call me names.

Sounds silly but im just getting so depressed, Me and my friends wanna organise a girls holiday but the first thing im thinking is i dont want to swim because i hate being in a costume .. it shouldnt be like that.

Anyway i have booked a docs appointment for 17th march as thats the earliest i could get with my doctor but i am so scared about beiing weighed and talking about my weight it scares me so much.

Im 5ft9 and weigh about 22 stone .. awful i know.

My dad is in the process of his gastric bypass and wants me to have one as well.

Any advice?

Thanks guys
xxx

hi pinky, it made me really sad to read this, u are obviously a very brave intelligent woman and u really must stop putting urself down....sumtimes we are dealt a hand in our lives which gets out of control, but u have been brave enough to recognise this and stand up to it. u have taken the first step which is goin to see ur doctor...as u have already been advised go armed with as much info as u can so he/she knows u have researched this (can u take someone with u for support?)...what area are u in pinky, perhaps someone on the forum knows more about ur pct...please be strong and recognise how clever and brave u are for facing up to ur problems..n get goin on that girls holiday xxxxx

 

[teen]

Firstly Pinky you are not silly at all. Don't be scared to talk to your Dr just get in there and explain how you are feeling. Hope it all goes well O ye and welcome to mini's There is plenty of people pre and post op that can give you info

 

[Silversurfer]

Hi Pinky

Welcome to the forum and as others here have said dont be afraid to talk to your doctor, thats what they are there for, you might even find they are sympathetic to your situation !

Ok reading through your dilema i'm going to say something now other's here may deem as negative - i'm not known for my tact so please dont read this the wrong way !

In my view you are to young to be considering a bypass ! - the bypass is a life long commitment and will change the way you eat, go out, drink and socialise in general, - Now a bypass was the right desicion for me as i'm a lot older, and i've tried absolutely everything to lose weight for years, and it may be the right solution for your Dad, but at 18 i certainly wouldn't have considered anything as drastic as a bypass. Now i know you have a lot of weight to lose, but have you tried or considerd other less evassive methods, i have a friend who's just finished lighter life and lost 9.5 stone in 8 months. Now i dont advocate liquid replacement diets at all, but there are other methods of shifting weight without the ultimate commitment ! WlS must be considered your last option ! its not the easy option !

Sorry dont mean to offend or upset anyone.

 

[charliegirl]

Hi and welcome to Minis. I have to agree with Silversurfer, he tells it as it is and I for one find that very refreshing...there are other routes you could try before taking the massive step of bypass surgery. If I were you I would make my first step a chat with your GP and be honest with him/her see what they can offer...good luck though in whatever you decide....xx

 

[quetiapina]

Hi Pinky, I have no advice but just wanted to say that your comment re holiday and first thought "Swimming Costume" is exactly how I have lived my life.
I am 40 now and my fear is that there will be a school reunion or something and will be the fat sweaty paranoid one who feels a failure despite things I have achieved.
Gastric surgery is not to be taken lightly (!), it took me about 3 years of umming and ahhing until I just thought I cannot go on with this and so am having a gastric band.
I feel for you so much, at 18 a person "should" be having a ball. It is horrible to feel exposed and I find, myself being tall, that it is amazing how many short slender people just happen to be in my friendship group ( I stand behind one particularly short one in photo's).
Good luck in whatever path you choose to take. Lv Jenni x

 

[Pandora_150]

As a 21 year old who is awaiting a bypass operation and I would honestly say that I wouldn't let your age get in your way or hinder your decision!

How many times on this site have I read about how PCT's should follow NICE guidelines? NICE recommends the surgery for those who are aged 18 and over!

I do, however, agree that all other steps should be taken to try and loose weight before such a drastic procedure is considered (as again is stated within the NICE guidelines). Weight loss surgery should be considered as a last option after all other avenues have been exhausted; it should not matter what age you are when get to that point in your life.

Bariatric surgery is not something to be taken lightly and I know that I have fully considered all the implications and changes I will have to make to my life post-op. As long as you are aware of the implications (both good and bad) I do not think your age should hinder you from trying to change your life.

I have missed out on too much of the 'normal' experiences in life because of my weight, much like Pinky is doing at the moment. I have never been on holiday with friends; I have not been swimming in years; I have spent my life (however short you may consider it to be so far) on the sidelines. Even when my weight was not a physical limitation, the emotional limitation of being obese has always stopped me from fully enjoying life.

Pinky, you should not be scared to go to your doctors because at the end of the day s/he is there to help YOU! Whether that is to help you find a way to loose weight with or without the possibility of surgery. Have a look at the NICE guidelines and the criteria for your area if you believe you are a suitable candidate; research thoroughly each option you believe is open to you (both surgery and other alternatives); talk to your doctor and see what s/he thinks is the best direction for you take at this stage in your life, make the decision together and hopefully you will get to where you want to be in life.

All the best, and keep us informed of the decisions you make in the future!

x

 

[lesleyweb]

As a 21 year old who is awaiting a bypass operation and I would honestly say that I wouldn't let your age get in your way or hinder your decision!

How many times on this site have I read about how PCT's should follow NICE guidelines? NICE recommends the surgery for those who are aged 18 and over!

I do, however, agree that all other steps should be taken to try and loose weight before such a drastic procedure is considered (as again is stated within the NICE guidelines). Weight loss surgery should be considered as a last option after all other avenues have been exhausted; it should not matter what age you are when get to that point in your life.

Bariatric surgery is not something to be taken lightly and I know that I have fully considered all the implications and changes I will have to make to my life post-op. As long as you are aware of the implications (both good and bad) I do not think your age should hinder you from trying to change your life.

I have missed out on too much of the 'normal' experiences in life because of my weight, much like Pinky is doing at the moment. I have never been on holiday with friends; I have not been swimming in years; I have spent my life (however short you may consider it to be so far) on the sidelines. Even when my weight was not a physical limitation, the emotional limitation of being obese has always stopped me from fully enjoying life.

Pinky, you should not be scared to go to your doctors because at the end of the day s/he is there to help YOU! Whether that is to help you find a way to loose weight with or without the possibility of surgery. Have a look at the NICE guidelines and the criteria for your area if you believe you are a suitable candidate; research thoroughly each option you believe is open to you (both surgery and other alternatives); talk to your doctor and see what s/he thinks is the best direction for you take at this stage in your life, make the decision together and hopefully you will get to where you want to be in life.

All the best, and keep us informed of the decisions you make in the future!

x

well said pandora, i cudnt agree more...i think it shud also be aknowledged that many people who have had wls have suffered with obesity for many years of their life....i bet most wud agree if they cud have had this sooner to have had a better quality of life, the honest answer wud be yes.....i agree it shud b the final decision when all other avenues have been explored and failed....gud luck in what ever ur decision is pinky xx

 

[fatbutnot4eva]

Totally agree with you
I am 32 almost 33 and wish that I would have been as knowledgeable at 18 and saved myself years of heartache and failed diets.
I am heavier now but not much and have yo-yo dieted for more than 20 years.
I think that its is personal choice who says that you have to be 30 or 40 or 50 to have wls, why shoudl you go through the best part of your life being fat or unhappy or on a permanent diet.
Your dr will know you better than anyone else, they will know what you have been through to try and lose weight and keep it off.
I dont think at 18 you shoudl run off abroad or pay £££££ to fix it as I think at a younger age you need the support of the NHS for lifetime support. I also think that when you are paying for it your own wellbeing might be overlooked whereas on teh NHS they will try every option before wls is considered which I feel is teh right way to go.
Good luck whatever you decide xx dont let your young age be a negative though, this just means you get to have the life you want earlier x

 

[Pinky2009]

is your dad a private or nhs patient ? have u tried all other aspects of weight loss ? would a bypass be right for your eating habbits? i am a bander.

let us know a little more about u hun, we are here to help and support you

liz xx

I have tried everything .. Its horrible but i have been dieting since i was 11 i am now 18 and nothing has ever worked for me i have done several diets numerous amount of times but nothing .. Grr Xx

 

[Pinky2009]

Hi Pinky

Welcome to the forum and as others here have said dont be afraid to talk to your doctor, thats what they are there for, you might even find they are sympathetic to your situation !

Ok reading through your dilema i'm going to say something now other's here may deem as negative - i'm not known for my tact so please dont read this the wrong way !

In my view you are to young to be considering a bypass ! - the bypass is a life long commitment and will change the way you eat, go out, drink and socialise in general, - Now a bypass was the right desicion for me as i'm a lot older, and i've tried absolutely everything to lose weight for years, and it may be the right solution for your Dad, but at 18 i certainly wouldn't have considered anything as drastic as a bypass. Now i know you have a lot of weight to lose, but have you tried or considerd other less evassive methods, i have a friend who's just finished lighter life and lost 9.5 stone in 8 months. Now i dont advocate liquid replacement diets at all, but there are other methods of shifting weight without the ultimate commitment ! WlS must be considered your last option ! its not the easy option !

Sorry dont mean to offend or upset anyone.

Hiya, Thankyou for your advice but i have thought about this seriously for 2 years now .. I have been dieting since i was 11 maybe even a bit younger and nothing has ever worked trust me i have tried absolutley everything .. I have looked into it all and i know what im getting myself into i just dont want to wait and then get it in 5 years time when im even bigger. Thankyou for your advise though x

 

[Pinky2009]

Hi Pinky, I have no advice but just wanted to say that your comment re holiday and first thought "Swimming Costume" is exactly how I have lived my life.
I am 40 now and my fear is that there will be a school reunion or something and will be the fat sweaty paranoid one who feels a failure despite things I have achieved.
Gastric surgery is not to be taken lightly (!), it took me about 3 years of umming and ahhing until I just thought I cannot go on with this and so am having a gastric band.
I feel for you so much, at 18 a person "should" be having a ball. It is horrible to feel exposed and I find, myself being tall, that it is amazing how many short slender people just happen to be in my friendship group ( I stand behind one particularly short one in photo's).
Good luck in whatever path you choose to take. Lv Jenni x

Hiya Jenni .. Reading your post reminded me so much of what i do when you said about standing behind someone smaller in photos .. i do that all the time if someone wants a group photo with the whole body in i make one of my friends stand in front of me and when people take pictures i always say can you please make sure you only have my boobs and above in the picture .. i hate living like this its ridiculous i shouldnt have any worrys i should be enjoying my youth but i just cant. Thankyou for your post it was lovely

xxxxx

 

[Pinky2009]

Thankyou everyone for your lovely replies .. My appointment isnt for a couple of weeks but i will keep you updated. I just want to say i have seriously considered this for over 2 years now i have been thinking about it i know most things there is to know about it because i have looked into it so many times. I understand some of you think i am to young but i am deemed an adult so why shouldnt i be able to do the same as every other adult no matter how old. I would rather try all my options now than live in misery for another 10 years hence why i am looking into it so young. I have been obese all my life i have always been the fat one at school and the fat one in the photos and i am fed up with it .. on my final straw now i just want to be young fit and healthy.

I really do appreciate all the support, Thankyou very much

Much love

Pinky

xxxxx

 

[Silver Shoes]

HI

Just wanted to say that i would have had the op at your age if I knew about it! I have struggled all my life with my weight...Why should u have to wait til u are 30 to change your body to make you healthier and happier. I have had so many other medical issues which could have been avoided if I wasnt obese. I'm now 32 and feel like I am now me! I wish I had done it sooner, I wasted so many years being unhappy and unable to keep my weight off. It is your choice, your body, and if you really have tried everything else then maybe this could be your tool to succeed. Its major surgery, but I for 1, have not regretted it apart from wishing I had it sooner!! lol Good luck with everything.

Kel xx

 

[Pinky2009]

Hi Silver Shoes

Thankyou for your lovely post .. Yes im 18 years old but ive already got bad ankles .. if i walk to far without trainers on i end up twisting them or going over on them .. My knees go funny sometimes aswell and when i walk i get agonising back pains if im walking long distance which isnt right really is it. Thankyou for your advice.

Take care

Pinky

xxx

 

[serenitylove]

im a bander not a bypasser but ify had been around when i was 18 i would have had one in a shot would have saved years of problems, i personally wouldnt have had the bypass that younge i couldnt face it at 36 let alone half tha age but thats just me go with what you feel is right

 

[Silversurfer]

Hi Pinky

As Pandora pointed out there is always another side to these things, and quite rightly that because of her size she's not been able or felt able to do normal things with her life, thus missed out, i guess you must be in the same sort of situation really to be contemplating WLS as 18 !

If you do go through with WLS then enjoy your journey of discovery, the next 12 months will see massive changes to your personality, body and the way you eat, but the biggest change will be to your wardrobe as your drop the weight !

 

[Pinky2009]

Hi Pinky

As Pandora pointed out there is always another side to these things, and quite rightly that because of her size she's not been able or felt able to do normal things with her life, thus missed out, i guess you must be in the same sort of situation really to be contemplating WLS as 18 !

If you do go through with WLS then enjoy your journey of discovery, the next 12 months will see massive changes to your personality, body and the way you eat, but the biggest change will be to your wardrobe as your drop the weight !

Just awaiting my docs appointment to see what they say .. dreading stepping on those scales i cant do it myself when no ones around let alone when people are there but not to worry .. I know if i do get accepted for it, it will just be amazing being able to borrow my friends clothes and go shopping to places like river island with them which i cant do now.

Thankyou for all your support

Pinky

xxxxx