Were you scared and did you almost change your mind?

[emmakc]

Hi everyone

I was supposed to have my gastric bypass last Friday. However, a week before I had a complete mental breakdown and cancelled the op. I think having a crappy time at work, added to the pre-op diet and last minute nerves were the reason.

One minute I go from being completely gutted that I didn't do it as I'm so miserable being the way I am and the next I think "god Emma, you were going to mess with your internal organs and would never live a normal life again".

Did you have a last minute wobble? How is life after surgery (apart from being really happy that you've lost weight), do you feel healthy or do you feel sick and weak a lot? I think my main concern now is that I won't feel "me" again for such a long time. I have a young family and can't afford to spend months feeling like crap. Sorry, for the post not making much sense I'm rambling!

If anyone out there has had it done recently, would you mind me calling you?

 

[Yvessa]

Hi Emma, like you I have a busy life and a 9 year old daughter. And yes i was terrified but I had gotten to the point where I had tried everything else - I too had cancelled a surgery 4 years earlier as I decided I could do it myself. Bottom line - I couldn't.

After my op, for the first month it was hard. I was tired a lot but the weight did fall off. I was snappy, irritable and downright irritating! I was bypass obsessed too. But after a month I started to perk up , went back to work at about 7 weeks post op and I don't regret a moment. Its not easy - our mental states are pretty fragile post op, but the energy I have, the mobility and the lack of pain are amazing! I still have a very long way to go, but I feel so much better and happier. My daughter has benefitted from me having the op as well, rather than suffer - we now do more together and go out more often and she is happier too. My partner is also in a better place.

 

[bexh]

Hi Emma

I can totally understand how you feel! I was due for surgery last Wednesday, got mega per op nerves, was thinking of cancelling the day before then I got a phone and THEY cancelled, the surgeon was off sick. I am quite a hard women and don't cry a lot but I was in bits, so think I did want the op really. But then convinced myself I didn't and it was relief they made the decision for me, must be fate I thought! So I have spent the last week to-ing and fro-ing with my decision. Thinking like you that I really don't like the idea of having my insides butchered just to lose weight. Going without etc etc.

So they rescheduled my op for 6th Sept which also contributed to me not wanted it now as I orginally had it scheduled specifically for the summer hols as it is hard for me to do this being so far away from friends and family whilst the children are at school and I didn't want to book them time off. So a couple of days ago I rung up the team to cancel, got a call back the following day to say they'll just postpone to give me more time, but I have now told them I want to do this op 100%. I'm worried now that they don't think I'm psychologically ready for it and postpone anyway. Got to chase them up today to check as I'm due to start the milk diet AGAIN (did 13.5 days out of 14 last time).

Anway a bit of a ramble, but I know how hard it is being stuck between the decision. Either way is a hard decision, like being stuck between a rock and a hard place! I knwo the op is the best option for me, having bought new scales recently which analyse your body I found helped, telling me that 78% of my body is just fat! Having to accept that yes this op is drastic but I NEED it. Will be hard for a few weeks following it, I'm prepared for this but know in the long run it will be the best decision I have ever made.

I hope you come to the right decision for you soon.

Bex

 

[amanda577]

Hi Emma!! I had my surgery two weeks ago, and was agonising whether to go through with it right up until the last minute. I was actually almost in tears when they actually put me to sleep I was so stressed. I am not going to lie to you, and say it was an easy decision to make, it wasn't. This is a life changing procedure, and the decision to go ahead with it, is not one to be taken lightly. But saying all of that, even with the off days, I am so glad that I found the courage to go through with it, and as the weight is beginning to come off I can see a whole new life in front of me.... If you want to call for a chat then pm me and I will give you my phone numbers... xxx

 

[emmakc]

Thanks everyone, bexh something similar happened to me the day I cancelled. My consultant called me as he'd had a really crappy letter from my GP (I'd ask for him to do all pre-op tests and he'd refused) so my consultant suggested postponing whilst I get my GP on board. When I spoke to him on the phone I was like "No way, I'm on pre-op diet, its school holidays and I've taken time off work" then after call I was thinking, this is a sign that I shouldn't have it done etc. and I ended up cancelling.

Amanda, I'd really love to talk to you esp as you are so soon out of op, I can't pm you as I've not posted 50 times but could you email me . Thanks so much x

 

[Sarahj2710]

Hi Emma. I really feel for you, it's a hard decision to make and it is so huge I went through the whole range of emotions prior to the surgery. I was determined that I didn't want the surgery after all and actually started on the lighter life diet, then got a call offering me the date for my surgery and went for it (by the time I got the call I was ready to give up lighter life, as it was making me ill, another failed diet). I am 3 1/2 weeks post op now and although it hasn't been easy, I am glad I have had it, as I think that going forward it'll be fantastic. Please feel free to email me if you want my phone numbers, I'll be happy to talk to you too. This site is fantastic, all the support etc in invaluable. Let me know if you would like my email address.
Sarah
X

 

[amanda577]

sure will mail u now x

 

[chrisa]

Ladies I can sympathise with you all this is a very personal journey and each one is individual, it is a rollercoaster ride and i can honestly say we will all have felt like that at times right upto the last moment of our eyes closing, I was very excited and very calm in hospital but normally i wouldnt have been, it was just before i went off to sleep that the thought crossed my mind this is it do i want it, just closed my eyes then i was being woken up and it wasdone, I can honestly say, it has been a strange year but it has not been as hard as i thought it would be. I think it has been harde rfor my friends and family because they have tried to do things w3hich i would be ok with, i ahve been out for meals , iwent back to work after 2 weeks, I did most things I always did, they tried to wrap me up in cotton wool but thats not me, my only regret is that I wish i had been younger when I had this fantastic opportunity. The choice is yours to make, just be certain, because you might just be throwing the best gift you could ever be given away x

 

[emmakc]

Hi SarahJ I'd love to have a chat if you don't mind, my email is [email protected] thanks

 

[Sarahj2710]

Hi Emma, anytime. I tried looking at your expose email, looks a bit technical to me... My email address is [email protected]. Please feel free to mail me. X

 

[OOnion]

I was scared, really scared...that I was going to die if I did not loose some weight! Yet this was still not enough to motivate me to loose weight and get active - I felt I had passed that, the ship had sailed.

I am almost 6 months post op now and almost 6 stone down, It is honestly the best thing I have ever done - I feel alive again, I can put my shoes on without getting out of puff, I can do a lot of things my friends can do, I can see my feet and best of all I can see myself living to old age now.

I feel I was damaging my body, more so than a surgeon and his knife ever could - I honestly do not have one regret. I had read a lot on here pre op, and was waiting for my days of tears when I felt regret or sorrow for what I had done...I am still waiting !

Good luck in which ever journey you choose - at the end of the day (- it gets dark!) it has to be what is right for you to do. xxxxx

 

[emmakc]

Thanks for your posts everyone. Oonion I hope I'm like you. I wish I could fast forward to six months post op! Just waiting for the date now. I'm still completely up for it one minute and thinking wtf am I doing the next but hopefully that's normal.

I don't think they'd be too happy with me if I cancelled again!

 

[ceejay]

Hi Emma. I am post-op sleeve, not bypass, but the same thing...
I cancelled bypass twice before (Dec and Feb) and was told I'd be taken off their clinics altogether if I didn't make my mind up what I wanted to do. I had lost a good bit of weight prior to cancelling, but the main reason was pure panic! I thought long and hard, looked at my 3 children and knew I had to do something as the weight was slowly creeping back on. I was sleeved 7 weeks ago!
I had a rollercoaster of emotions over the days leading up, and I told my hubby as we were walking in that if my bed was the middle one, not near the window or door, then it was my sign not to go ahead.... I had the window bed (best for me), my op was on the anniversary of my wonderful Mother's death and my childcare worked out perfect. All signs for me to go ahead.
The morning of my op, my surgeon asked me if I was sure, I questioned my situation, and answered with the only choice I had.
I have to say that a day or two later, I worried I'd made a huge mistake, but I think that's natural and very common. I now feel so much healthier, fitter, less stressed, shout less, happier, confident..... My kids will grow up to be proud and not embarrassed by me. I will only become more self confident and outgoing. My hubby loves me no matter what, but I'm sure that twinkle in his eye gets a little brighter every lb I drop....
You will know what is best for you, and if it helps, ramble away.....
I just did!!

 

[dimond]

Oh Emma like everyone has said its only you that can make that decision. I'm 2weeks post op now and i feel great. I went through every emotion possible before my op, even a day after I had it because I got a chest infection and was poorly but now I do not regret it at all. Whilst in hospital I put a pound on and thought wtf! But this week Iv lost 9 lbs, I would NEVER have lost that by myself and this has completely boosted my confidence. Can't wait for next weeks weigh in lol. I hope you come to the right decision Hun as life isn't a practice run, we only get one go at it and it needs to be grabbed with both hands and enjoyed xxx

 

[Yvessa]

Hi Emma - don't worry about whether they're happy or not - its your decision and your money! If you're not sure, take 6 months and try another diet - one way or another you will know what's best. I went for it because I knew I was eating myself to death. I didn't feel alive or well and I wanted to stop feeling like that. I knew I couldn't diet. I was desperate.

 

[emmakc]

Thanks everyone I'm still bricking it but I'm booked in for the 28 September (four weeks today)!!!

I wish I hadn't cancelled as it would all be over now and I would have been 2weeks post op