Why are people around me so negative!

[bex986]

Grrrrr am getting sick of peoples negativity.
All I am getting is comments and questions like
'What if you regret it, what if we go out and you can't eat how are you going to feel,' why don't you just eat less! Why do you want it, Think you'll never be able to enjoy food again!

Don't they think I have thought this through more than anything and worked for this with psychologists, dieticians etc.

I know they are only looking out for me and thinking of me but seriously can't people instrad of questioning just say thats great it'll be good for you etc!

Lol sorry for rant, dreading tomorrow, am seeing the MIL for the first time since she learnt I am getting surgery, when she heard I was considering it all she did was question and question and just say its a cheats way out!!

Am looking at this surgery on the 2nd april as a major positive and a new start but people don't half try and bring you down!

 

[Lippyloirston]

Friends and family negative comments can be so frustrating! I think if you explain how important it is to your health and how seriously you have considered your decision, they should get on board with it. If they don't ...... B*gger them it's your life. Good luck x

 

[clare-revised]

Always remember that friends & family love the who, biggest friend, biggest cousin, niece, sister...it's a habitual feeling. When imminent change is forecast said persons often feel incredibly threatened as dynamics of groups, cliques etc change.
Your doing this for you - that's ALL u need to think about xx

Ps - good luck xx

 

[los in it]

I have to say I agree with Claire by you deciding to have WLS you are changing your life for the better but in turn changing your position in their minds making them un happy
well blow them! your doing not to make them unhappy but to make yourself happy
let them carry on you just go on full steam ahead
good luck

 

[joanne7271]

Hi, I told my family this passed weekend. I am glad to say that they were supportive....... eventually. I think it was more of a shock for them than anything else, obviously I have had two years to get my head round this and just to let them know i am goin in in two weeks was a big shock for them.

I have explained to them not to say anything until I had finished and told them exactly why i needed it for health reasons etc. now they totally understand my reasons and they either have to accept it or take a hike.

Thank god no one walked cos I really need them.

Hope it goes all well for you and keep ya chin up xxx

 

[fabi]

Hi bex
Know exactly how u feel, when I was reading ur post I felt like it was myself writing. My operation was going to be on the 14 th of February but got canceled. Hopefully will have it very soon. Deciding to have it wasn't a easy decision and the pre diet makes u wonder if u doing the right thing.
Be strong ! Don't let anyone put u down!

 

[Wendy1]

You will never regret it, every time you buy a smaller size you will feel great, and as time goes by you will be able to eat anything, only smaller. when i was larger i would not eat anything out side, people would think no wonder she is fat. but now i can, its great Good luck, and think YOUR WORTH IT xxx

 

[EighteenStoneGirl]

I just ignore them Bex. I know who I'm doing it for and I know why I'm doing it... it's not for them and everything anyone says to me goes in one ear and out the other.

I know it's difficult, but as long as you're secure in your choices, nothing they say can change your mind.
This isn't just about being a size 12 and looking fab, it's also about feeling healthy, being healthy and prolonging your life.

People just don't seem to get that part.
If it means you can't eat a roast dinner ever again. Big effin deal! Roast dinners haven't exactly been good to me over the years have they? It's what got us into this state. lol

For me it means I'll hopefully be able to get pregnant, have the family I've always wanted, be able to run for a bus without dropping, have the energy to work more and fulfil my career goals, fix my depression issues which are mostly all related to my body image and sense of self and to finally have the body I've craved my entire life.

If those aren't good reasons to get this done... then I really don't know what is!?

 

[bex986]

Well saw my MIL today and surprisingly she was ok, didnt really bring it up so neither did I, which was fine by me as did not want the questioning. So tired of explaining to everyone why, and why i just don't 'eat less' but as you have said they are used to me as I am and will need to get used to a new me, and like it or lump it! My friend said to me bit ch you'll be smaller than me!' I think she was joking but not what I need. They don't seem to understand i'd rather be healthy than eat a huge meal now, but I need the tool (surgery) to help me achieve that better. They don't understand that once I have the surgery its only the beginning of a massive change I need to go through not just have surgery and eat less as they think, and that its taken me 3 years to get to this point not just asking the Gp and getting referred so I've worked for this and am more than prepared for it.