1st appointment at Heartlands

[Fashionably Late]

Well, to say it was disastrous would saying something positive about this afternoon. I met with Dr Taheri first and then the dietician. Dr Taheri was pretty awful. Basically, I am too educated to be this fat and how is it not possible for me to understand that I need to eat less. He wouldn't even discuss surgery with me. Said I need to exercise at least 30 minutes per day. I don't cry easily but he had me bawling. He put down my marriage and said I was a slave to my husband and kids and I need to stop comfort eating. Refused to acknowledge that my asthma is weight related. Said to see him in 3 months and also take Xenical in the meantime even with my IBS. Fine.

Dietician was lovely. Really positive and said to call her when I lose 5% of my weight and she would see what she could do for me. No one would discuss surgery with me at all.

I just don't get it. Some people at the same hospital have one bloody appointment and then get their surgery dates and others are put through hell and back. Makes no sense. I wish I could afford to go privately because I would after the hell I was put through for 2 hours this afternoon. It was completely humilating.

 

[margaretmc]

Hi FL
He is a bloody cheeky sod saying that to you hun . Sure Asthma is a Co-morbiditie what is he playing at .Take care .
Margaret xx

 

[j.u.s.t.l.i.z.]

some surgeons are just stubborn you must keep fighting for what you want, maybe hes just had a bad day and thats come out in his consultation with you and it wrong.

liz x

 

[Jezabelle]

Hi FL....

I was hoping that you was going to have better news than me.
Was it Dr Taheri himself or one of his team mates?

So basically you have been told to lose the 5 to 10% weight and to go back in 3 to 4 months.

I really don't know how others have past this stage and got to see Dr Super as there 1st appointment. Perhaps they have changed the rules? They did say to me that it was the hospitals policy for people to lose weight before being referred to Mr Super.

I've been on a diet since last Thursday, 1500 calories a day which I hope to drop to 1200 once I get past the hunger stages, i'm also taking xenical but may stop taking them and take my Reductil that I had prescribed to me last year.

I also wish I had the money to go private, but I don't...

 

[Snowcrystal]

Well, to say it was disastrous would saying something positive about this afternoon. I met with Dr Taheri first and then the dietician. Dr Taheri was pretty awful. Basically, I am too educated to be this fat and how is it not possible for me to understand that I need to eat less. He wouldn't even discuss surgery with me. Said I need to exercise at least 30 minutes per day. I don't cry easily but he had me bawling. He put down my marriage and said I was a slave to my husband and kids and I need to stop comfort eating. Refused to acknowledge that my asthma is weight related. Said to see him in 3 months and also take Xenical in the meantime even with my IBS. Fine.

Dietician was lovely. Really positive and said to call her when I lose 5% of my weight and she would see what she could do for me. No one would discuss surgery with me at all.

I just don't get it. Some people at the same hospital have one bloody appointment and then get their surgery dates and others are put through hell and back. Makes no sense. I wish I could afford to go privately because I would after the hell I was put through for 2 hours this afternoon. It was completely humilating.

Hi FL

I am so sorry you went through that...what a b**tard...I don't usually swear but omg what a condescending *rse.

He has no right to talk to you like that, no-one has and I couldn't care less if it were Prince Charles and his Mum, they'd get the a tongue lashing too.

BTW, I know that IBS and Ulcerative Colitis are different but they both have a huge impact on what comes out the other end so I wouldn't touch xenical if I were you...I have UC and my GP wouldn't give it too me...

Can you see another surgeon?..Ask your GP?...Tell him/her what he (the *rse) said...You could also pop in to PALS (in the hospital) and ask for a chat in confidence about how the surgeon spoke to you as they are obligated to keep it low key until you want to go any further.

Wish I could be more help to you.

All the best hun...please don't get too down about it...Don't give up either...(I'm sure you won't).

((((hugs))))

 

[Fashionably Late]

Thanks everyone. I cried the whole way home from Birmingham and have been crying to my husband since I got home. I saw Dr Taheri himself. He was really rude. I just cannot believe some of the things he said to me. He didn't tell me how much weight to lose. Said I just needed to focus on being healthier. Plus, he said I needed a different antidepressant than the one my GP ordered. I am on antidepressants because I have depression and anxiety surrounding my twin daughters medical conditions. They are in and out of the hospital and we are still trying to find out what is wrong with them.

The dietician was the one who said to call when I lost 5% because she was worried I would go below the NICE guidelines. I asked if we could discuss bypass versus band and they wouldn't even entertain surgery with me.

 

[Jezabelle]

When I got weighed there last Thursday my BMI was 49.8 and I thought they might have referred me to MR Super as I know someone on another forum who had a BMI 50 and had her band fitted 3 months after her 1st appointment. She didn't have to see the incompitent dr's that we seen and was seen by Dr Super himself.

It's probably our luck that they changed the Hospital rules.

If I was you I would write a letter of complaint, no DR should talk to his patient the way he has spoken with you.

 

[thinkbethin]

Aww I'm so sorry you got put down like that. Why is it us larger peeps feel belittled by such ar*e holes. You want this op, YOU need this op and most of all YOU are going to get this op.Stand your ground and just humour him by doing what he asks and then after a couple of weeks kick ass and demand some answers to whether or not he's going to do it instead of leaving you hanging around not knowing.
Good luck FL xxGaynorxx

 

[Fashionably Late]

Thanks so much everyone. I am done crying and now seriously pissed off. I am going to lose that 5% that the dietician said and then I am going to demand my bypass!

 

[Fashionably Late]

When I got weighed there last Thursday my BMI was 49.8 and I thought they might have referred me to MR Super as I know someone on another forum who had a BMI 50 and had her band fitted 3 months after her 1st appointment. She didn't have to see the incompitent dr's that we seen and was seen by Dr Super himself.

It's probably our luck that they changed the Hospital rules.

If I was you I would write a letter of complaint, no DR should talk to his patient the way he has spoken with you.

This is what doesn't make sense to me. I talked to another lady on another forum who saw the doctors last month and now has her date in a next month without going through this BS! I just don't know why the rules are different for everyone.

Regardless I will lose the 5% and will get my surgery. The dietician was very lovely and I will rely on her for help.

 

[Snowcrystal]

I hope everything is ok FC.

If you get nowhere please have a chat with the PALS people attached to the hospital...they will keep it confidential. They will soon tell you if 'he' can speak to you that way.

He doesn't sound like a compassionate professional at all...If they can't be empathic with the patients they deal with then it's time to go.........And they seem to forget who pays the wages!

Do keep us updated...I'll keep checking in.

ps: Hope the twins are ok too.
(((hugs)))

 

[Fashionably Late]

My husband thinks I should speak with the PALS office about this as the level of treatment was pretty horrific. I am worried that if I speak with the PALS office that Dr Taheri will go even more overboard and refuse to refer me onto the surgeon. I don't understand why he wouldn't even discuss surgery with me since that was supposed to be the whole point of the appointment.

I have left a message for the lovely dietician I met with as she gave me her number and thought about asking her how to proceed as well. She seemed surprised when I even mentioned surgery.

 

[Snowcrystal]

My husband thinks I should speak with the PALS office about this as the level of treatment was pretty horrific. I am worried that if I speak with the PALS office that Dr Taheri will go even more overboard and refuse to refer me onto the surgeon. I don't understand why he wouldn't even discuss surgery with me since that was supposed to be the whole point of the appointment.

I have left a message for the lovely dietician I met with as she gave me her number and thought about asking her how to proceed as well. She seemed surprised when I even mentioned surgery.

Hi FC

If he wouldn't discuss surgery with you and the dietician is surprised when mentioning the surgery aspect I think you should go back to the GP and see how the referral was made for you.

You do have the right for a second opinion and this is what the PALS people will be able to advise you about. However, I totally understand why you are afraid to approach them...Patient Liaison are supposed to act as a go between first of all and thereafter have to have an obligation to the patient and their families...(I had the PCT manager as my mentor for 3 days about 6 years ago and found it fascinating. I was privy to quite a few liaisons with patients and their families during that time).

I found this for you:

About Patient Advice and Liaison Services (PALS)
PALS are a central part of the new system of PPI in England. They are available in all trusts.

PALS provide:

Confidential advice and support to patients, families and their carers.

Information on the NHS and health related matters.

Confidential assistance in resolving problems and concerns quickly.

Information on and explanations of NHS complaints procedures and how to get in touch with someone who can help. More information can be found from the Complaints policy section of the DH website (see link below).
information on how you can get more involved in your own healthcare and the NHS locally (see link Make Time for Health below).

A focal point for feedback from patients to inform service developments.

An early warning system for NHS Trusts, Primary Care Trusts and Patient and Public Involvement Forums by monitoring trends and gaps in services and reporting these to the trust management for action. More information on Patient and Public Involvement Forums is available from the Commission for Patient and Public Involvement in Health or Make Time For Health websites (see links below).

PALS act on behalf of their service users when handling patient and family concerns. They liaise with staff, managers and, where appropriate, other relevant organisations, to negotiate speedy solutions and to help bring about changes to the way that services are delivered. PALS will also refer patients and families to local or national-based support agencies, as appropriate. For more detailed information, please see the PALS core functions link below.

Complaints policy
Download PALS core functions (PDF, 22K)

I hope the link works on here........

You could of course speak to them anonymously or ask your husband to speak to them on your behalf as they will listen to any family member concerning a patient.

I hope you get this sorted....this doctor has crossed the line....who does he think he is?

Good luck hun.

(((hugs)))

 

[Fashionably Late]

I spoke with the GP and the referral was clear that it was for WLS. I made a written complaint and sent it onto PALS and they have rung me back. They are angry for me. They said this would have been pertinent if it were the psych appointment but this was the initial appointment for surgery. They have passed my complaint onto the head of this department so we'll see what happens.

 

[Snowcrystal]

I spoke with the GP and the referral was clear that it was for WLS. I made a written complaint and sent it onto PALS and they have rung me back. They are angry for me. They said this would have been pertinent if it were the psych appointment but this was the initial appointment for surgery. They have passed my complaint onto the head of this department so we'll see what happens.

I am so pleased that at least the GP's referral was clear, what did the GP say about the surgeons attitude to you?.

I'm pleased that you got a prompt response from PALS...It sounds like they will get a result for you...This could work in your favour...(I think it will somehow)...at least it could get you an appointment with another surgeon in the same hospital.

I wish you all the best for this.

Let me know how this goes.

(((hugs)))

 

[tesmaralda]

The heartlnds do make you go through their weight management course and they like you to prove that you are committed and serious about losing weight. However this is no excuse for him to speak to you like that I would contact PALS and say you would like to make a complaint about the way you were spoken to.

It takes and awful lot to seek help and to admit with have issues with food and need help. Don't be disheartened try and lose 5% and show the little **** how serious you are.

 

[Jezabelle]

It looks like Dr Taheri will be reading the letter then as he is the Head of the department. I found this out when I was looking around the internet. He is the clinical head of wls - It's not him that performs any of the wls surgery though. The consultant who I seen and who is under him said they all work together as a team... Nice team eh

I spoke with the GP and the referral was clear that it was for WLS. I made a written complaint and sent it onto PALS and they have rung me back. They are angry for me. They said this would have been pertinent if it were the psych appointment but this was the initial appointment for surgery. They have passed my complaint onto the head of this department so we'll see what happens.

 

[Jezabelle]

I really hope you get some joy out of the letter.

I phoned Dr Taheri secretary this morning to inform them of my high blood pressure she said she would pass the message on.

 

[Fashionably Late]

Dr Taheri is the head of weight loss but not the clinical director of diabetes and endocrinology. That person, I believe the name is Barnett, is who is getting the letter. This has now gone above Dr Taheri thank goodness.

I also question why some people at Heartlands are forced to go through this weight management clinic whereas others meet with a surgeon on their first visit and then are given their surgery dates. There is no consistency.

 

[Snowcrystal]

Dr Taheri is the head of weight loss but not the clinical director of diabetes and endocrinology. That person, I believe the name is Barnett, is who is getting the letter. This has now gone above Dr Taheri thank goodness.

I also question why some people at Heartlands are forced to go through this weight management clinic whereas others meet with a surgeon on their first visit and then are given their surgery dates. There is no consistency.

Hi FC

Just thinking about you and wondered if you have had any news yet?

How is it all coming along?

(((hugs)))