Attitude... how's yours?

[Neen]

I had this in an email today and I wanted to share it as it is so true!!!
It's from Jillian Michaels , who's inspired me to heave my sorry butt on the treadmill many a time!

How To Improve Your Attitude

Do you have what it takes to reach your weight-loss goals? If you think it's all about diet and exercise, you're wrong.
It sounds crazy, I know. Exercise and a proper diet are crucial to all weight-loss and fitness programs. But to reach any long-term goal — especially one that requires a major lifestyle change — you need to improve your attitude too. You can have all the external support in the world, but if your self-esteem is in the toilet, you'll never have long-term success.
Having the right attitude is so important because thought is behavior. The power of the mind is total — the way you think about yourself manifests as your reality. We all know how easily negative thoughts can lead to lack of confidence, hopelessness, and depression. You've heard about self-fulfilling prophecy, right? Well, if you tell yourself that you'll always be fat or you'll never find happiness, chances are you'll end up fat and unhappy. Hey, it makes sense. Okay then, let's turn that scenario around. Tell yourself that you can get fit and you will be happy. It's that simple. You can master your own fate with positive thinking!


Sometimes we all feel hopeless but there is always hope and we all have it within us to get slim and healthy and make our WLS and weight loss plans work..we have to believe we are capable of doing more than we give ourselves credit for normally and we deserve the end goal xx

 

[RoseA]

So true ! Thanks for inspiring us

 

[Kerry Jo]

Thanks!!! I'll give it ago, may take some time, but worth it. They say the mind is a powerful thing xxx

 

[Neen]

Thanks Rose and Joanne xxx
Attitude is a lot more powerful than we credit it for....we don't allow ourselves to try a lot of the time because of lack of belief that we can achieve anything...and with most diets setting us up for failure anyway by convincing us we can't trust ourselves and it's our fault for being weak when they fail it's little wonder we tell ourselves nothing will work or we will never be content with life...or we simply are not one of the lucky ones...we have to try and stop that malarky!!
It takes 21 days to form a new habit...so corny and cheesy as it may sound (lol food mentioned again aargh)
How about for 21 days...today being day 1...try and NOT say anything negative about yourself to others or internally...weird as it may feel, just say to yourself/ write it down and put it on a note whatever you can think of etc....
"I WILL LOSE WEIGHT, I DESERVE TO BE SLIM AND FEEL GREAT, I WILL BE SLIM, GORGEOUS, HAPPY AND HEALTHY!! I CAN DO ANYTHING!"
or some such positive statement and stick on a bit of paper on the mirror...in your purse etc everywhere and any negative thoughts or words you find yourself saying/thinking..batt them away like flies and just read that/think that. At first it will seem odd/wrong/plain daft etc...but we made ourselves believe we were fat and failures for years so much to the point of needing surgery...If we have that much influence over the shape of our bodies, let's try and make ourselves believe we are really meant to be happy, slinky and fabulous instead!!!!

 

[Twiggie]

Excellent post and so true! Actually, you've just reminded me of something my GP mentioned just last week...

Positive affirmations!!!

I've shamelessly pinched these from a website to give an example of some of the things we can say to ourselves:-

• I deserve to be happy and successful
• I have the power to change myself
• I can forgive and understand others and their motives
• I can make my own choices and decisions
• I am free to choose to live as I wish and to give priority to my desires
• I can choose happiness whenever I wish no matter what my circumstances
• I am flexible and open to change in every aspect of my life
• I act with confidence having a general plan and accept plans are open to alteration
• It is enough to have done my best
• I deserve to be loved

Apparently it helps to boost self-esteem & confidence. the idea is that each day we choose a PA to write down, then repeat it to ourselves throughout the day. I said I would feel stupid doing this but he said that in itself is a negative thought :8855:

 

[Glenville]

What a smashing positive thread! I can so relate to the negative thoughts, well in the past I could. Now I am so keen to grab new experiences and friends. It is very difficult escaping from the old ways, but it is well worth the effort because once you are on a role... the world's your lobster!

 

[Neen]

I think it's very true that we have conditioned ourselves to feel silly for saying nice things about ourselves..what a pity eh? Who's actually benefitting from that I wonder?
I think that's a british national thing isn't it? Generally frowned upon to be positive and feel obliged to ridicule anyone who is successful and positive and upbeat? What the hell is that about? I don't think being self-effacing is noble or the right way forward...it's not making anyone happy.. I'm sad that we are so pressured to dismiss positive thinking and be seen to write it off as nonsense.
Well from now on..I will embrace the positive affirmations!! Who's to say what's proper for us but ourselves anyway...people who mock us for wanting good things to happen and grabbing the chance to be positive and uplifting to ourselves and others...well more fool them I say!
Being typically sarcastic and pessimistic and fitting in with popular opinion has got me nowhere but bitter and unhealthy and dull and miserable....
I am definately going to do my affirmations with a big cheesy smile on my face and I don't care how daft anyone thinks I am....I will be the one smiling inside and out in the end with a slim body to show for it!!!

 

[thinkbethin]

Great thread Neen!!! Thankyou xxx

 

[Neen]

Thanks Gaynor xxxx I wish you would stay posting more often young lady..don't hide when it's going awry...come here and tell us what problems are going on and get it out in the open. We all have horrendous stalls and things but I think being on here and sharing the best and worst days can really help the bad times end sooner. It's good to have the support to give a boost even when you have no weight loss to report xxxx

 

[thinkbethin]

Thanks Gaynor xxxx I wish you would stay posting more often young lady..don't hide when it's going awry...come here and tell us what problems are going on and get it out in the open. We all have horrendous stalls and things but I think being on here and sharing the best and worst days can really help the bad times end sooner. It's good to have the support to give a boost even when you have no weight loss to report xxxx

Bless you Neen xxxx
The reason I've been away this time is that I've been in hospital. Spent 8 days in HDU with my asthma then 4 days on the ward. Came home friday but still on anti biotics and steriods (which is'nt helping with the stall either). All is well now though lol xxx

 

[Neen]

Well that's a huge relief that you are better..and having the defill is going to help so much to get you back to 100% as well. You have been missed xxx

 

[thinkbethin]

Well that's a huge relief that you are better..and having the defill is going to help so much to get you back to 100% as well. You have been missed xxx

I'm back now with vengance lol and there's no getting rid haha

 

[Neen]

Well you better be !!! Now don't forget to tell how you did tomorrow OK
xxx

 

[gaelic girl]

What a lovely inspirational thread Neen! I've always said that the mind is way behind the body after weight loss surgery and its so true. I still see myself at times as a "big girl" and its hard to get out of that! Those words are great and the statements you have posted Twiggie are also great so i'll be reminding myself of them when my mind lags behind xx

 

[phatmomma]

Brilliant thread... I think if we could try and turn negatives into positives as well as the power of positive thinking then life could be sweeter...

The one i have is not my negative comment, my mom says regularly that my husband should look harder for work (my OH is training to be a counsellor and this has to take priority for the next 12 months), i turned it around and told her while himself is at home he is doing chores so i don't have to when i get in from work and also it means my 11 & 12 yr old have someone at home during school holidays so they don't get farmed out to others and all the expense that comes with that...

Not such a bad negative to change i think

 

[12dobidog]

Neen well done on a great thread
This is why I have "You are what you Are and no one can change it but YOU"
I was told this when I was a kid by my mates foster parent He was an old Japanese guy who was very wise. Attitude is a very powerful trait
Well done you and all that have A POSITIVE MENTAL ATTITUDE

 

[Neen]

Hi Allie ! Thanks for responding x I think it's really good for us who have been overweight and treating ourselves badly for so many years, to allow ourselves to feel proud and be kind to us ...especially after going through the entire surgery process, from the wait til the goal. We must just try to stop self criticising and making jokes about ourselves and looks etc and be comfortable and accept that we are gorgeous and awesome! Cos we are! Look at what you and others have achieved..and how hard the road has been. I think it's weird to talk positively to your self at first, and as I said, sometimes it feels a bit daft..but we set the example to others on how to treat us. If we make jokes and negative comments about ourselves in front of others , trying to be accepted or stop them from saying it by saying it first, then we are showing them we don't value and respect ourselves and it kind of then becomes open season on treating us like dirt.
What makes me sad is people who have lost lots of weight but still talk about themselves with self loathing and refuse to believe they are worthy of accepting compliments and good things happening in life. We should always try and look for positives !

 

[Neen]

Hiya Julie xxx I think you have always shone as having a brilliant attitude from the getgo and having such a strong persona will definately mean you are going to attain your goal in no time. I think it is sad that your Mum can't see the bigger picture regarding your hubby and his studies....I am sure you have already been through the talk about it leading to better employment after the studies are complete and better prospects etc. Some people jump in to criticise without wanting to look at the real story of whats going on. Usually just out of worry over us if it's a Mum...well we're Mums so I guess we can understand the angle to a degree. I hope that her thoughts on the situation will not knock hubbies confidence or anything.
Also, like you said...it's great that your kids get him there to bond with etc ....what matters is what works for your personal little family unit.

 

[Neen]

Hi B! Well that chap was right on the money wasn't he? How lovely that you knew someone so wise too and I hope his words will boost you in tougher times. Being overweight for a long time does dampen your spirit and it's a huge uphill struggle to mend the damage to your self esteem. We are all on the road back to health now though aren't we? And things are becomming more possible...even we can do anything we want to..it's just a little daily effort and forgiving ourselves each little blip til the good days outweigh the bad ones and we realise we are totally worthy and deserving of wonderful things in life as well as anyone else. We mustn't dismiss little improvements or sweep away compliments from others...we have every right to bask in our successes and feel good !

 

[Neen]

Hope everyone is feeling good and being kind to themselves !