Co-workers

[Yvessa]

Hi everyone,

I have often seen threads along the lines of 'don't want to tell anyone' etc etc and I have always felt strongly that you might as well tell people, because most of them will figure it out.

I was very open with my coworkers and friends and family, and have only ever had one person be really negative (my own mum).

I showed the photo that was my yearly comparison around work this week, and I'll admit a little bit of nervousness here - would they think I was being vain?? The support I got was incredible and people have been so positive.

I even got this message from one of my colleagues who is sadly leaving to join another school

Hiya

Her is my mobile, let's keep in touch. #######. You have done really well since your op and you look fantastic, keep it up. Will see you soon!

Lots of love,

So you might wonder why I'm posting this - after all, I do agree that only you know the people in your life and whether you can tell them or not.

I'm posting because I wanted to let people who were on the fence know that normal people can understand and can support you - not every person is negative - and every bit of support you can get on this journey is invaluable.

I'll get off my soapbox now

 

[Paula Garner]

I have to agree Yvessa. I told everyone including my co workers. Since I began my journey, they have supported me 100%. When I was hospital and at home post surgery, they all came to see me and bought me get well gifts.

They made me soup when I was on liquids and they even bought me a get well gift, which was a makeover at a local hair salon. Now I'm back at work they all get excited when I weigh on a Monday, to find out how much weight I've lost.

So as Yvessa said, just give people a chance, you may be surprised at the amount of support you actually get

 

[Karlos]

I've always believed that being totally open with colleagues allows the good ones to be open and supportive with us, and even more importantly it disarms the snidey barstuards who love to speculate and talk about us behind our backs

 

[JO28172]

I agree folks, my colleagues have been nothing but supportive, god love em

 

[flutterby1966]

Yes I agree. I have never avoided the truth. I have only had extremely positive / supportive comments to my face, and well, even if people have made negative comments behind my back, then that's their prerogative...they can think what they want. After all we are all entitled to our own opinions. I have learnt in life, that just because people have differing opinions, it doesn't mean someone has to be right or wrong ... That's just the way it is ...

 

[joffy01582]

i made no secret of my op at work quite the opposite

 

[chrisa]

I told those who i worked closely with day in day out and the management in case my app was in school time lucky for me it was in the summer hols. Tis one of my sisters who is negative bout the lines that have appeared around my mouth n eyes, thinks it makes me look older, i am happy its her problem. I got a staff Christmas card on thurs it said what a 'proper lush lady' i was never been called that before, haha xx

 

[chrisa]

This is my sister who comments bout my weight loss n my lines on my face was her 50th birthday party friday 21st dec my next sis on theright n me on the bleft in the gold top, She used to be the skinniest thing until late 20's now she is the biggest the other 1 lives n breathes ww's x

 

[Samsara]

Some people are so bitter :/ Good on you for recognising the problem is hers and not yours x

 

[Paula1975]

I only told a few people at work, mainly because alot of guys wouldn't understand, and I mean even explaining o don't think they'd still understand, so those that know have been really supportive had a few funny comments but brushed them aside after initially getting to me

I popped to see parents few weeks ago and my dad said I'd done well, and that's something coming from a man who likes to put you down for the slightest thing.

Sent from my iPhone using WLSurgery

 

[amanda577]

I told all my colleagues at work, when I first made my decision to have the bypass. 90% have been so supportive its been fantastic. I have found a couple of people who were "friends" now avoid me and are extremely off with me, but overall the support and encouragement has been lovely and much needed as I live alone and the only people I really see are my work colleagues..

 

[JoeH]

I've old all my work collegues, otherwise they may have thought there was something wrong with me once weight loss took hold. Boss's reaction was 'How long will you be off?'

 

[angiemason]

i have had no problems at work either but very much supported especially when things got a bit tough with the aneamia tiredeness etc they have just sent me a beautiful bunch of flowers because i am off at the moment after my gallbladder op , i really think there was no point hiding it because how else would i have lost so much weight in such a short time , i like to think they deserve the credit for knowing how to respect peoples actions and courses in life

 

[shelleymarie]

The most supportive group of people in my life regarding my bypass, other than on here, are my work colleagues, even more so than close friends and family. They constantly boost my ego about how amazing it is and they remember how awful things were before. I think because they saw me try to do things they saw the gravity of it all and now they see me do things with ease they are still amazed. Also because we are on a rota sometimes I don't see some of them for a few weeks at a time and they can then see a difference. Something family/close friends who see me more often don't notice the difference for much longer periods inbetween. I'm not sure what I would of done without them as they have really kept me going and make me feel good about myself which didn't happen for a long, long time before my surgery. I understand not everyone has such understanding colleagues but if you find you can tell them then you should because that extra support is great x

 

[Angela1310]

My work colleagues have been brilliant, I didn't find it difficult telling them. Mind you I think the milk diet is a giveaway that you are trying to shed weight

They even had a milk lunch with me to show Christmas solidarity as I couldn't go to the Christmas dinner. I know they will be as helpful after my op and be tracking my progress.

I am truly blessed with the amount of support I have been shown.

 

[Yvessa]

I don't know whether it was in response to this thread, but a close friend of mine decided to speak out on facebook about her op soon after it was posted - it seems she's had nothing but positive responses. Give people around you the chance - agree with Karlos that the snide ones don't then get a chance to moan.

 

[penelope1008]

I was open & honest with family & colleagues feeling I may well need their support post op. My mum was only slightly negative as she was worried for me so I gave her a load of bumph about the options & once shed read it she has been fine. My sister in law made a negative comment to my husband once saying you said I looked old & scrawny when I got down to a size 12 to her husband. But as we've never got on its her problem not mine.
If the kids at work have asked I've been honest or said I can't eat chocolate when they've offered it to me & explained why if they've asked beyond that. When I first got back to work post op one of my tougher kids said "bloody hell miss you've lost weight I hardly recognised you. Have you had a band like my step mum?" I could honestly say no to that, but after he kept asking & the rest joined in I explained what I'd had done, they were all positive.
Colleagues have been great, one saying on my return,"bloody hell you look 20yrs younger" but he's never been diplomatic. Others hardly recognise me as I've slimmed down & changed my hair style, my glasses for contacts etc. one the other day asked what to I call you, & looked blank when I said you've known me for 10yrs, he still looked blank so I told him my name & the look of surprise on his face did much for the ego.
At 8st lighter I feel great I've still a stone or so to go & some may be the floppy bits of excess skin but I'll see if I can manage it in 2013.
I'm happy for people to know & so far with their responses, if I have a bigger meal than usual at work I have a colleague who thinks I need to be careful incase I burst, & another who thought I would only ever be able to eat liquid foods not normal food. It's still fun educating people about my bypass & my new eating regime but most of all its fun being a healthier, happier me.
If others have a problem with it its their problem, I have the usual bigger things to worry about affecting me & my family to take on their problems to.

Sent from my iPhone using WLSurgery

 

[Yvessa]

I'm bumping this as I'm seeing a lot of the same questions again. Again, only my own opinion, but you can't hide post op weight loss behind the i'm dieting excuse. doesn't work.

 

[femfrankie]

I have to agree Yve. I started out with the fewer people that know attitude but with rapid weight loss people do notice and compared to bypassers, sleevers & wrappers my own balloon assisted weight loss is slow in comparison! But people do notice and comment. Some have be quite concerned. I am a terrible fibber so I now find it easier to be upfront... Not only that I find that people you thought you could trust wholeheartedly with the info in the first place are probably not so tight lipped.. My mum in law and daughter in law in my case .
Mum in law told her neighbour. Daughter in law told her sister. Goodness knows who my three best friends have told lol so with all the best intentions in the world it will get out.
I also have to say that nobody has given me negative feedback at the news apart from my number 2 son who is totally against it. Honesty I have found is the best way.

 

[beckaboo]

I'm loud & proud about my op but that's my choice & I know not everyone wants to be... I'll literally tell anyone that asks me!!! If anyone is negative towards me & says that's not what the NHS is for I ask them if they'd rather the NHS spent £10,000 upfront or god knows how many thousands over the next 50 odd years of my life... It tends to shut them up pretty quick! Everyone I work with has been supportive & understanding plus their comments on my progress have helped me on days when I've been a bit down I had a friend who really wasn't sure why I was doing it but even she's come round now she's seen the benefits