• Hi, If you cannot get into the site, be sure to Contact Us. Please be advised that the app is no longer in use!

Got op date at Sunderland - Sooo nervous. Does anyone regret their Bypass????

It's taken just under a year from me crying to my Doctor to getting the phone call today with my operation date and reality is starting to set in. I am so nervous about it all and don't really feel like any of the 'health professionals' have given me much information so far (but have said 'research online' a lot).

I am worried sick about the recovery time (I have very young children who like to jump on me frequently and require being carried around). I also work full time so I'm stressing how this is all going to be impacted by my recovery.

I feel like I need to talk to people who have been through a Bypass. I'd like to know if anyone actually regrets having it done? Do the Pro's always outweigh the Con's?

Am I going to be in constant pain every time I eat? With gas or cramps?

Alcohol - I very rarely drink it anyway but am I going to be able to still have it?

How will I ever cope without tasting chocolate again?

What if all the loose skin I end up with is worse than the fat?

Will my life become a constant mental battle with what I can't eat?

How will I deal with 'dumping'?

What's it going to be like when I'm a little old 'thin, loose skinned' woman? Will my body deal with the years of malnutrition?

What if I'm the 1 in 100 who doesn't make it through the operation? (I may have just made that statistic up) :confused:

All very silly questions I know. I haven't told anyone about my operation ... and I feel kind of alone .... :(
 

Rosalie

New Member
I can sense you panicking! I have still to get a date but I bet we all had similar questions. This site is a life saver. Also, of you're on Instagram search wls and rny and you can see a whole list of guys and girls asking the same questions and helping eachother. I wish you the best.
 

joanne7271

Shrink me please x
Hello there,

There are soooo many questions in your message and I will try to answer them the best I can (obv only my view!)

I am from Sunderland and was bypassed on March 31st 2014, you can see my results below. I think everyone feels the same and has the same questions so dont worry, you are feeling quite normal! I had the full bypass (not the mini) ande I have never looked back. I had all of the same issues you did and honestly, I can pout my hand on heart and say it is the best decision /I ever made. I thought I was going to 'miss food etc but I dont. I can eat anything still just ALOT less of it. So here goes trying to answer your questions

Recovery time: I am in a similar situation with three children (sense mine may be a little older than yours though) - I work full time too. I can honestly say I would have gone back to work after a week/fortnight but had a reaction to the gastro tablets they give you so if you feel at all unwell when you leave hossie, give them a call, it may be the tablets. I felt like vomitting all the time and had a sickly feeling constantly. However, if I hadnt taken the tablets, I was truly bouncing! You probs wont be qble to lift but yu will have to judge yourself when you feel you can. Remember, your stomach has no pain receptors so there is no pain inside from the op and this is why you have to be careful.

Talking I am more than happy to meet up for support and I can honestly say I do not regret having the op. In my opinion, yes the pros outweigh the cons. Thats not to say some people may regret it, this is just my thought.

Eating pain I felt no pain at all, recovery, eating or any other time. Yes I had wind pain, mainly in left shoulder! but you need to move, walk it off and you are given mintec tablets to take to help. To be honest though, moving is the best. It aint too bad either, not crippling...... This easede off after two to three weeks with me and remember this time is going to go by sooooo fast, promise. With the cramps I didnt suffer but just listen to your pouch, and STOP eating when you feel full. The biggest thing to get your head around is that, when do I feel full? ITs a learning curve and although you can literally eat a few spoons (in puree staqe) it does increase as swelling goes down. By this point you will be so used to eating the couple of spoons you then start worrying about overeating lol. You arent though, just keep in mind how much you used to eat!

Alcohol Sunderland recommend 12 weeks without. I followed that rule and have had no issues at all. ?You will be a cheap date because it will probs take less to get you drunk now. I used to be a cider drinker, I can manage one half but it takes me all night cos it so gassy. I now drink shorts or wine (with ease!) but two or three and i am wobbling lol. You get used to it and its cheaper, think of the money you will save! Like you having children I dont get out much but enjoy it more now cos I feel great and look better too. So dont worry you will drink again

Chocolate Well, I stated, I am not a dumper so I am going to be honest, I have tried chocolate - was scared at first thinking is this going to make me dump....... no it doesnt. I have only had it a couple of times but now I am seeing the results of the surgery I dont want to eat it. My tastes have changed a bit and I never used to like chocolate before that much but now I have4 gained a sweet tooth and it is hard on the days where all you wanna do is eat sweet stuff. This is the battle I face but then I look at old photos and new ones and realise I dont wanna go back there. That soon diverts the craving...... lol.

Loose skin I am starting to get a little loose skin now but I walk walk walk all the time. Remember you are goin to be able to exercise much better when you have lost weight. this surgery is a tool, you still have to do all the work to make it a success. It is not an easy option. I actually enjoy walking and exercising now. I am never going to be in the olympics but I do what I can manage and I dont sweat as much anymore or get out of breath....... all positives for me. Loose skin is the least of my worries, only me n hubby will see it and if all esle fails, I get the bugger cut off even if i have to save for it!

Eating Yes, in a word, you will have a mental battle but isnt that what you are doing now but hating yourself afterwards for eating what you are? Believe me, you can eat the same things just healthier options, and again remember, you are goin to eat much much less. The hardest thing I find Is not what to eat its the amount. I still out too much on my plate and leave most of it! I am still early days too so need to work on that. however, once i got my head round the whole thing, i have found it easy (had no real issues) You mental state is the one you battle with, not food and not eating etc. It is yourself........ the 'I got myself into this, I got to get myself out if it' battle goes on all the time but it does get easier, especially when the weight starts shifting. ?You will start to feel great, promise.

Dumping Wait and see, you may not be a dumper, not everyone is and you will soon learn what you can and cant eat. Your tastes may change and you may not want to eat the things you do now anyway. Only after the op will you learn this. there is always lots of help and advice on here if you need it after. Even if you do dump it is only 20-30 minutes to get over it so i would suggest if you are trying something new, try at home first as if you do have an episode you are goin to need to be close to a toilet!

Loose skin You may not have loads of loose skin, and if y9ou do, this is what you need to take into consideration. How would you rather be, slim healthy, there for you kids and happy and living or unhappy, fat and a potentially shorter lifespan? I know what I would choose. I know that may seem harsh but this is the question at the end of the day and only you can answer that question chick. Are you thinking 'I could live the rest of my life like this, I aint that bad' or are you thinking ' I have health issues, I need to this for my family and myself?' this is what you need to be asking and if you feel the you could live like the way you are, dont go through the op. you should have no major doubts goin through this. Yes there will always be doubts they are normal but major can i do this, live like this doubts I would be questioning if this is the right decision. You will not be malnourished, why would you be, you will be eaqting healthily and taking your supplements, you will be fine. Remember, you are not feeding the body you have now, you will have shrunk and wont need all the food you are consuming now.

OPeration You will make it through the op, have faith. They are the best in the country. On my op day I went down to surgery and cried in the waiting area...... the girl said to me if you arent sure about the op say now. I told her it wasnt the op, i was 100% certain i needed it doing, I was afraid of not waking up and my family etc etc. She said dont worry, that is what we are here for to look after you, you will wake up! She was lovely and hey presto here I am , woke up!

These are not silly questions honest and I felt exactly the same. I have tried to answer them from my perspective and sorry about the mistakes (i got these stupid nails on and I cant type properly lol!) Have you a partner to support you and there is a group in the hospital that meets the last thursday of every month.

Good luck with your journey and if you need anything, just ask :) x
 

chrisa

New Member
That was a fab reply Joanne most of what you have said is very accurate in my case also. I am 3 yrs post on 20th August and also suffer from the very sweet tooth. My advice would be never to go back on sweet things if you can help it once you do the craving gets worse, avoid it at all cost if ya can, that is my one regret. I also wanted to sya what you can eta one day may not be fine the next time you try it, our pouches can develop a dislike to things out of the blue. I have been able to eta just bout everything I used to fish was a struggle in the 1st year but now is fine to have. I have noticed in the last few weeks braising steak and beef and sometimes gammon and pork fresh cooked meat apart from minced beef I tend to have a problem with now even after chewing it well it seems to cause me problems in the bowel. I have to rely on buscopan to sort it out. I had gammon bits in a sandwich last night and even though I chewed it well and left most of the white bread which I don't normally have I had bad tummy later on buscopan when I got home and this morning been to the loo and all ok again now. That's how my tummy works thesed ays, but am sure it will turn around again and find something different to do. This is an amazing op and I THINK you feel quite well quite quickly. You will have to be careful about lofting after your op they wouldn't even let me bring out my pull along case. Even reaching for the line can cause pain if over stretching I did that 1st week post op had to go to bed for rest of the day very sore. xxx Keep asking whatever you need to. My biggest fear was not waking up as I had a funny experience years ago but it was I woke up to soon I knew I still had the airways dummy still in and couldn't breathe myself thought I was guna die. TOLD the anaethesit this and he reassured me I would be fine and that would not happen this time and he was right it didn't. I am a nervous
worrier at times and I found that having this op was so much needed by me that all my nerves went I went down to theatre calm and confident only when I was getting the knock out juice did I think am I doing the right thing which I pushed away immediately and then I was waking up all done. xx Just go with the flow xx
 

joanne7271

Shrink me please x
Hi Chrisa, yes I forgot about the one day to the next differences. It was quite a long reply and didnt wanna waffle lol. I can eat anything, any meat, fish, bread, pastas, rice. There isnt anything I cant so far and I am only 5 months out now! It is amazing, just shows the experiences of different people.
This is what I am trying to say to her, everyone reacts differently and she wont know til she takes that leap of faith. I feel great and have had no probsw apart from a hiccup at the beginning. Yes some days I dont feel like eating some things but I just go with what I am comfortable with that day, its great. I am happy again and feel like a butterfly coming out of my fat cocoon I have been in all my life! I look people in the eye now, get a bit of male attention (even though I would never admit I enjoy that bit!). Lifes good. Yes people have had problems but I havent heard anyone say they wish they had never had it done.
 
Thank you so much for this information Ladies.

Joanne, your detailed reply has really made me feel a lot better about it all - thank you!! I would love to maybe meet up and chat. Have you ever been to the support group at the hospital? I'm far from shy but just not sure how I feel about being in this kind of setting (I am having images of it being like an AA meeting, where I have to stand up in a circle and spill my gutts about not being able to control my food addiction) :p

Thanks again for your replies :)
 

chrisa

New Member
Where do you live? There are plenty of groups you can go to where that won't happen they are coffee n chat where you can meet like minded people who will chat about their experiences and you can ask any question you like. I set up a 1 in Durham over 2 years ago then we started them at Darlington I don't get very often now but they are still going and most people have found it fab for being able to ask everything they wanted to know. Some often meet at the metro also, there are lots just depends where you live xx If you are in Sunderland area you can talk on here to J.U.S.T.LIZ she used to run the SRH sessions. Sometimes they have meets up in Sunderlanditsself. xx I live in Willington nr Durham xx
 

NorthamptonGirl

Active Member
Hi needtofeelnormal.

I was bypassed at the beginning of July and reading through your post reminded me so much of how I felt beforehand.

I know Joanne gave a brilliant answer, but here's some of my thoughts, 6 weeks in.

Recovery time:
Work wise it depends a lot on the type of job you do. I work in a call centre. My surgeon gave me a sick note for two weeks, but I ended up taking 3 as I just didn't feel mentally up to it after 2 weeks.
I felt very little pain from the operation at all.

Am I going to be in constant pain every time I eat?
Eating/drinking very small amounts, very slowly will help this.
If you DO have any pain, I find Windeeze tablets brilliant.
Just don't push yourself and you'll be fine.

Alcohol
I'm now 6 weeks post op and have had a couple of drinks. I spoke to my dietician about it and all he said was: A) nothing fizzy B) remember alcohol has calories C) you won't be able to handle as much as before the op.
This weekend I drank three glasses of wine of Saturday (felt a little tipsy) and two on Sunday.

How will I ever cope without tasting chocolate again?
Remember your reasons for having the op. My thing was coke, how was I going to cope without tasting that again... answer: Cola flavoured lipsalve. If you feel like you really need to taste chocolate there are ways.. Hot chocolate drink and chocolate lipsalve being the first two that come to mind.

What if all the loose skin I end up with is worse than the fat?
The more you exercise, the less excess skin there will be. If it is bad though, you can always look into having it removed in the future.

Will my life become a constant mental battle with what I can't eat?
As Joanne said, I had more mental battles with myself before the operation than I have now.
Once you have fully recovered, you will be able to eat most things anyway, just be careful with portion sizes etc.

How will I deal with 'dumping'?
If you have something that causes you to "dump" once - you won't have it again!
I've had it twice, and I recognised the symptoms the moment they started the second time... I put a cold flannel on my face and lay down for 10 minutes and felt much better!

Malnutrition/Loose skin
One important word.... Vitamins! Make sure you take what they recommend :)

Again though, would you rather be large and unhealthy, or have a bit of excess skin?

What if I'm the 1 in 100 who doesn't make it through the operation?
I didn't tell many people beforehand just how scared I was about this.
I "prepared" everything, just in case. I was convinced I would be the one it went wrong for... and look, here I am :) I broke down on the way to theatre after my best friend left, convinced that was it. The next thing I knew I was waking up back in my bed. The staff with me were amazing and put me at ease as much as they could.
Your surgeon should go through all the risks with you, and answer any questions you have. Remember though they have to tell you about every risk ... the number of people it goes wrong for is tiny! If they didn't think they could safely perform the op, they wouldn't put you forward for it.

None of your questions are stupid!!!
I hope this helps a little? If you want to talk you are welcome to PM me.
Sam
 

joanne7271

Shrink me please x
Hi needtofeel,

I have been to a couple of meetings and found them more helpful before hand than after. I am quite outgoing but just sat there quiet because I felt people knew each other and felt like the new girl at school.

Plus I felt by having a one to one with someone would be nore beneficial, especially for personal questions. Didnt wanna bare all to everyone so to speak so totally understand where you are coming from. Do you live in Sunderland?

I will definitely meet up with you if you like, no problem. If I can support you in any way I am more than willing. When is your op date? xx
 

summer9810

New Member
I had op the 8th August In Sunderland and I'm absolutely fine now was fine after five days totally normal and have three kids and a husband to look after aswell as a house. I'm already eating normal foods as purree was making me gag I lasted five days on purée now I just make sure I chew properly before swallowing. First few days I was really really sore and thought oh my god what have I done but now it's a distant memory haha you will be fine :) x
 
Thanks everyone - you're all making me feel much better about it already.

How long did you all stay in hospital for?

Joanne, I live in Sunderland also. Op date is end of Sept. They offered me the beginning of Sept and I said I couldn't do it then (I just think I panicked that it would be so quick). I now have 5 weeks to get my head around it all and calm down ha ha.

The day I have to start my pre-op diet I am at a wedding which I have soooo been looking forward too. Got childcare sorted out, hotel booked etc (the thought of being able to drink alcohol is a very exciting prospect to me - I do not get to do it very often having two toddlers) but that's that plan out the window :strikeout_button:
 

joanne7271

Shrink me please x
Thanks everyone - you're all making me feel much better about it already.

How long did you all stay in hospital for?

Joanne, I live in Sunderland also. Op date is end of Sept. They offered me the beginning of Sept and I said I couldn't do it then (I just think I panicked that it would be so quick). I now have 5 weeks to get my head around it all and calm down ha ha.

The day I have to start my pre-op diet I am at a wedding which I have soooo been looking forward too. Got childcare sorted out, hotel booked etc (the thought of being able to drink alcohol is a very exciting prospect to me - I do not get to do it very often having two toddlers) but that's that plan out the window :strikeout_button:

Awww, u will be fine to start the next day, ask hossie. If it iwas in the middle I wud say watch wot ya doing but at the beginning I wud have thought it wudnt be a problem, give them a call. Some pl on here do weeks of milk diet some just do 5 days!

Hope you enjoy anyway and if u wanna meet up before the op just give me a shout........... not sure if u can private message me or not but I have sent u one.

x
 

joanne7271

Shrink me please x
Thanks for this Joanne, I have my op on 13th September and now feel even better after reading your advice xxx

Hi Spider, where are you having it done? I hope it all goes well for you and if you need to ask anything, go ahead I will try my best. I am pleased you found my post helpful, they are just my thoughts though. There are ppl further out than me who can help too xx
 
Top