How do you cope with the waiting?

[Sambucca]

I am getting so frustrated about the wait for WLS. I know its early days for me compared to the long waits that some of you have had, but I am getting so anxious and wound up which isn't usually like me. Its ALL I can think about at the minute.

Its not so much the waiting - its the not knowing whats going on as peoples experiences seem to be so different.

So how did you cope with the wait?

 

[phatgirl]

Sam I waited in total about 18 months and it was hard. From seeing the consultant it was just over 7 months to my surgery. What I did was do a ton of reading (about 5-6 wls books & countless articles) to get a full picture of what my life would be like after. I also educated myself about nutrition which I have to be honest I really didn't know much about before hand. I also tried to work on my head & my attitude so that I would make the most of my opportunity. I started meditating every day along with doing positive visualization which I know has helped me not sweat the small stuff. May sound hokey and ultra-new-age but it really helped me get my head sorted. Maybe a constructive hobby would work for you.

I really wish I had found this site back then so I could actually talk to people in the same position as me. You are lucky since you have many friends here from your area in the same position you are in so you can share the burden of waiting together.

Nic

 

[candie]

Like Nic I am doing a lot of reading and research, as well as buying smaller plates etc.Also preparing my family for what help I will need after the op
I am also getting impatient too, but I know it's pointless as the op will happen when it happens

 

[brett30]

hi hun .... i find its diff for loads of people what im hearing is people are getting paper work lost ... funding are having issues.. and the amount of people who are wanting to do this op is unreal ..

i have been lucky up to now i only started this in oct and i already have my funding and im at the hospital this thurs for 3 hr appointment to help me learn about my diet needs and changes in my life post op.. and then im to see surgeon on the 16th march .. i need sleep test and heart test .. and then i should be ready to go .. they told me surgery can be with in 6-8 weeks of seeing surgeon ..

so dont worry hun so many people have to wait diff times .. i have called the hospital everyday till i got my appointments mind lol .. i dont like waiting i like it all done now ..



xxx

 

[Alexa]

Sam I totally know were your coming from, i said this to Vicky.. WLS is one massif emotional roller coaster, We invest so much emotional energy into this.

I know I had a band in the interim but nothing happened with it, My initial referral was in 2003! Believe me it's well worth the wait. Keep them numbers close to you and keep chasing things up.

The PCT may meet at a monthly panel so it may not be until the end of Feb even March before a decision is Made it depends if the Manor get the paper work in on time for Feb's panel meeting.

 

[tesmaralda]

sam its really hard i know and I have been trying to think what to write since I read your post this morning. It's the not knowing thats the worst thing it's made worse by there not being one specific person that deals with one thing, we at walsall have spoken to that many different people. If you speak to Anna and ask her what the process is from seeing dr Hartland to being given a date she should know the correct procedure after all she is the speacialist clinical nurse. Other than that I don't really know what to suggest, other than you know where I am if you need to let off some steam.

 

[Sambucca]

thanks so much for all the replies girls. It helps just to have you lot to let off steam to, and I apologise if it gets a bit much at times.

 

[Alexa]

lol Ana is useless!

After seeing Dr Heartland they apply for funding once funding is confirmed you are then given a date for your pre op's.. now often they pencil you in for these dates but only write to confirm closer to your date. This is because they often jiggle you around,

Your pre ops are usually close together then surgery is usually within six weeks.. once your on that waiting they should be meeting national targets of 18 weeks!!!

I know waiting is frustrating but the waiting lists are not that long at Walsall if your done and dusted within a year than your doing great. Many other hospitals people are waiting from 2 to 5 years... though i know this does not help. I have a friend in Northern Ireland who has been waiting 5yrs now...

I had my first Referral in March 08 only the PCT sent the referral to the Spire and now Walsall! I had my consultations in May (I went with funding in place as I won a appeal) Ana then forgot to put me on the waiting list! But I had my pre ops and then had my band removed in October (so this would be if it was you your surgery) i then went back in December for post op check and had the Bypass in January. Not bad consider the initial referral was sent to the wrong hospital then Ana forgot to put me on the list the first time round!!

In Jan I phoned the hospital to ask if they had a date and they phoned me back to say I didn't have funding. Well I did but Tracey misinterpreted my paper work. It said not to fund secondary surgery! She took this to mean that because I'd had my band removed that there was no more funding. What it meant was not to fund a second bypass! So I phoned the head of the PCT who that day faxed over proof of funding and the next day Tracey phoned me with a date for ten days later!

So I had two surgery dates within a year so i can't see why you won't be hearing from them soon as the funding is sorted and like I said that just depends on what months panel they sit in front of...

 

[Brunetteandred]

The issue is quite plain for Sam; she has no faith in the system at WM and with good reason! We know the pathway, but sometimes I think we can tie ourselves up in knots on this forum because people's cases differ and we can have different expectations from the system.

 

[Sambucca]

The issue is quite plain for Sam; she has no faith in the system at WM and with good reason! We know the pathway, but sometimes I think we can tie ourselves up in knots on this forum because people's cases differ and we can have different expectations from the system.

Absolutely! Whilst its great to have this wonderful forum full of like minded people to offer support, I find myself comparing my case to everyone elses and then worrying if something happens on some one elses case that I'm not expecting.

 

[Brunetteandred]

Sam, given the recent experiences of some, I'd concentrate on the funding path. Like we have chatted about, it's the funding bit that's crucial at this point.

Hopefully your enquiries at Dr. H's office will establish at what stage the funding referral is at. At least that bit will be known.

Everything bar me eyes are crossed (only 'cos I have a splitting headache just now!) :hug99:

 

[Sambucca]

After seeing Dr Heartland they apply for funding once funding is confirmed you are then given a date for your pre op's.. now often they pencil you in for these dates but only write to confirm closer to your date. This is because they often jiggle you around,

Your pre ops are usually close together then surgery is usually within six weeks.. once your on that waiting they should be meeting national targets of 18 weeks!!!

yes, this is exactly what i was expecting to happen, and what Dr Hartland said would happen. However, the two latest ladies to have gone to WM (naugtypuppy and weightlosswannabee) have, it seems, been given a second appointment which does not seem to be a pre op but more of a follow up to the initial consultation. The purpose of me ringing the hospital today was to find out if this was a new procedure, and if so, is it something I have to go through.

Tracey was unable to answer me although she did offer to email Dr Hartland and chase up my file. I have tried phoning Ana to see if she is able to throw any light on the matter but havent heard back from her as yet.

 

[Sambucca]

Sam, given the recent expereices of some, I'd co0ncentrate on the funding path. Like we have chatted about, it's the funding bit that's crucial at this point.

Hopefully your enquiries at Dr. H's office will establish at what stage the funding referral is at. At least that bit will be known.

Everything bar me eyes are crossed (only 'cos I have a splitting headache just now!) :hug99:

Thank you. Hope the headache feels better soon x :hug99:

 

[serenitylove]

i hated the waiting a year pretty much from referal to op so not as long as some others had too i went out alot and enjoyed some very lovely food knowing i wouldnt be able to have it post op downside to that was i put a stone on! but the waiting is the hardest part

 

[teen]

Hang in there Sam and you will be doing cartwheels round the house before you no it. Its easy for me to say as I have been done, But keeping everything crossed for you Hope you get some answers soon

 

[Rising_Sun]

Absolutely! Whilst its great to have this wonderful forum full of like minded people to offer support, I find myself comparing my case to everyone elses and then worrying if something happens on some one elses case that I'm not expecting.

Sam, I can totally empathise here. The personal decision to go for surgery is such a huge one that when you've made it, you just want to get on with it. I started worrying from the start expecting problems precisely because I was comparing cases. Tbh, I felt quite sheepish when the funding decision came sooner than I had dared to expect. I agree with Brunetteandred that you should focus first on clearing the funding hurdle. I hope you're over this hurdle soon. Unfortunately I can't help with a solution for coping with the waiting - I'm still struggling with waiting for the next stage.
xxx

 

[shelbell]

Sam, there isn't much I can say aside from this...

 

[Sambucca]

Thanks everyone! You are all fabulous.

 

[Sambucca]

Sam, there isn't much I can say aside from this...

fantastic. thanks shel x

 

[jaynefrances]

Hi Sam - how frustrating is the wait !!
I'm a bit like you, i've already spent a couple of years jumping through the hoops and now that i'm finally on the home straight i'm more impatient than ever.
My first question to my husband when i got home tonight was "is there any post from Sunderland" ! and i think it will be the same until i get my apointment to see the consultant.
I said on another thread how difficult it can be to see other people getting there quicker than you, usually depending on where they are in the country.
I've no magic wand or solutions, but just wanted to let you know there are others sharing the same thoughts and feelings. I am so excited now though and try and make sure that these good thoughts outweigh the frustrated thoughts, and when i get low i surf the net and make plans for the "thin me" which usually bouys me up !
Won't be long now........