Negative WLS opinions from other obese peeps?

[Sharonimo]

Since my posts on Thursday / Friday about the lovely good luck cards and gifts some of the lovely peeps at work got me (and also finding out that most of the office still thought I was about to have an 'elastic band' 4 days before the op -- ha ha: http://www.wlsurgery.com/chit-chat/145600-one-more-thing.html) ....

It has become clear to me that there are at least 2 people at work who don't support me having this surgery (their names were noticeably missing from the good luck card and one has been trying to avoid me for days in the corridors and wherever she walks in the office -- I was very aware of this). Both of them are morbidly obese.

Having not spoken to either of them personally I don't know what their particular reason for being negative is -- it could be one of a number of reasons:

-- not liking the fact that I'm getting it done for "free" on the NHS ...?

-- thinking that I'm cheating and taking the easy way out ....?

-- thinking that I should just go back to Slimming World or WW again for yet another "loop the loop" weight loss and regain yo yo episode ....?

-- both being perfectly happy with their size and not having co-morbidities / other health problems not understanding why WLS is such a life saving tool for people like me with deteriorating health (Diabetes, osteo-arthritis, v v high BP, mild sleep apnoea, asthma, chronic rhinitis and an umbilical hernia already) ....?

-- both managing to stay at their respective weights (one is I think about 17 stone and the other about 19 stone) .... neither of them have ever been on a diet (as far as I am aware) in the 5 years I have been at the firm -- not that this is because they don't care -- perhaps they are genuinely happy at their size ...? *

* altho, credit to them - doctors do say that if you are obese and manage to "stay the same" (and healthy without co-morbidities) you are probably doing your body less damage than permanently yo-yo dieting

or ....

-- jealousy that I have managed to "jump all the hurdles" necessary to qualify for surgery on the NHS and perhaps they might not qualify (or they think that they would not) .....?

??????

 

[Ruthiep]

I remember saying I was happy in my own skin when I was 17st. You aren't, believe me. They are jealous. At least my friends (most of whom are only slightly podgy) openly confess to being jealous!

The question is, why did you tell all your coworkers?

Give my regards to Mr. Sufi, he was my surgeon too, he's great!

 

[Sharonimo]

Well I have been wondering how to tackle this (or whether to bother) or if there would be anything useful I could say to those people once I return to the office .... or 9 / 12 months down the line if I have successfully lost my excess weight and can prove that WLS works ???

I have been wondering whether it might be an idea to *eventually* make it known / send a round robin email to *all* the office support staff (ie everybody inc the slim ones!) saying:

-- Hi peeps, as most of you know ..... months ago I had a gastric sleeve and have now lost ..... lbs and am enjoying life again.

-- If anyone would like any information about any weight loss surgery options (including low cost private funding options or NHS criteria) please feel free to speak to me in confidence at any time.

-- During my journey I have learned lots about all the different surgeries (band, bypass, sleeve, wrap, and even a few more than that!) and through online weight loss surgery buddies I have learned about many of the private surgery funding options.

-- I'm happy to share any information anyone would like to know. Please do feel free to email me, or chat to me in private.

Or should I just not bother and leave people to make up their own minds / come to their own decisions in their own time .... ????

 

[Sharonimo]

The question is, why did you tell all your coworkers?

I didn't tell all of them. I initially told just my HR manager and supervisor when I was referred (Jan 2011) .... but after 16 months on the NHS waiting list I have spoken to about a dozen friends about it -- and those I did not speak to personally got to hear about it (2nd hand chinese whispers which obviously had given them the idea it was the band I was having).

However, I have been totally open about it from the start -- if and when it has come up in conversation I have just said it as it is. I never saw any reason to hide it or keep it private.

I think if I had been having it privately and there had been less time between initial consultation and having the op, far fewer would have known.

During my 16 months on the NHS waiting list I have had to travel back and forth to the Whittington several times for various appointments and tests (inc endoscopy etc) and people became aware of these as well.

And lastly ..... obviously about 2 or 3 days before I left the office someone sent a round robin email round (having somehow removed me from the global mailing list!) saying "Sharon's surgery next week -- who would like to contribute to a card and a gift" ..... so anyone who did not know by then would have definitely done so the last week I was in the office.

Give my regards to Mr. Sufi, he was my surgeon too, he's great!

Will do!

 

[Fuffs]

I wouldn't bother unless approached by people Sharon. I have been very open about my surgery. After that it's up to people to approach me if they want to know more

And

WOOHOOO!! It's tomorrow!!! So excited for you!! Xxx

 

[Luther]

I personally would not be bothered at all what others think and when you return to work looking fab for your weight loss people will say how you done it you look great and a lot more healthy and tell them that way the way I see it do what is best for you you are after all number one in this not them

Cheryl

 

[Sharonimo]

I wouldn't bother unless approached by people Sharon. I have been very open about my surgery. After that it's up to people to approach me if they want to know more.

Ah, OK.

I'm about to go offline for quite a few hours (cleaning and bag packing) .... but hope to be able to log on sometime mid afternoon for a quick peek at any other responses before settling into the hotel overnight!

Toodlepips !!

 

[Fuffs]

Ah, OK.

I'm about to go offline for quite a few hours (cleaning and bag packing) .... but hope to be able to log on sometime mid afternoon for a quick peek at any other responses before settling into the hotel overnight!

Toodlepips !!

Good luck with final prep chick xxx

 

[Caren]

i'll be thinking of you Sharon, good luck xxx

 

[lamornamiss]

Good luck for tomorrow Sharon
I look forward to your update after your op

 

[dinkydink]

Good for you for being so honest, I want to go down that road too! I think they probably are jealous, so sod them!! You are not doing it for anyone else you are doing it for you. As for the funding, if stats are to be believed you are actually SAVING the nhs money! heehee . good luck x

 

[mariew]

Good luck tomorrow Sharon. x

 

[Nanny Og]

Good luck for tomorrow

 

[Minoots]

First of all GOOD LUCK...

I have been very open with everyone who cared to listen... haha as well as those that did not care to listen !!

I must admit I sort of had 1 slightly odd remark on my facebook and when I told them that it was not by choice that I was having it and elaborated a bit, they have since come back with loads of good wishes.

At this stage of my life, i do not have the time or the inclination to waste on anyone who has any negative thoughts about MY life.... You dont like what I am doing .. your problem - not mine.

I must admit that the support that I have had from my WLS buddies is unbelievable, and attending the monthly meetings is the best thing that I have done.

i attend 2 - One at Heartlands - where I will be having my op on the 28th and one at Wallsal where I have made some lovely supportive friends.

Hang in there and do what is best for YOU..

xx

 

[Mazza]

Good luck for tomorrow Sharon x

The choice to tell or not to tell is always a hard one. I didnt tell anyone at work but I can relate to the seemingly jealous 'snubs' from colleagues who notice my weight loss but refuse to comment / compliment.

 

[Fuffs]

Good luck for tomorrow Sharon x

The choice to tell or not to tell is always a hard one. I didnt tell anyone at work but I can relate to the seemingly jealous 'snubs' from colleagues who notice my weight loss but refuse to comment / compliment.

Having haters is a compliment. You are obviously looking good

 

[Big an Bouncy]

Best of luck and speedy recovery,take things easy.Maz x

 

[chrisa]

Good luck for tomorrow Sharon i'm sure you will be fine xx

 

[Jane]

All the best for your op tomorrow

 

[trud72]

good luck with your surgery i get done on wed!:553: