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Sorry havent been around for a while

ldavidson84

New Member
Hi all, well i havent been around recently since my op. So much has been happening recently and i just havent had time to get on here. Some good and some bad so i feel totally drained at the moment.

My dad has got and appointment with specialist tomorrow and hopefully he will get a date for his triple heart bypass which is good but i know he is suffering and he trys to hide it. Then to add to this pressure my mum had a routine urine test at doctors and something has shown up that shouldnt so is now undergoing lots of tests to try and get a diagnosis and is now under a specialist, but dr told mum that cancer is possibilty :(
Then there is my sister who is suffering from depression at the moment and marriage problems and im trying to keep everything and everyone together.
With three young boys also i know my eating is taking a back seat :( im skipping meals and making wrong food choices. I seem to have hit a brick wall and its getting to me.

I started my journey at 19st 5lbs and my op was on 9th March and im now at 17st 11lbs but i cant seem to get below this, everytime i step on scales it says the same and i just cant get below it :(

Not everything has been doom and gloom as I started my new job as Ann Summers party and recruiting organiser, which is fun and keeps me busy at times when i want to go rummage in the fridge :eatdrink051:
This weekend was my hubbys 30th and we had great time but i know the food choices were not the best and the wine went down only too well.
I dont have restriction at the moment but the fear of damaging my band is stopping me eating loads. Im booked in for my 1st fill on 3rd May and so scared but so so excited, i need it!

I need a big kick up the backside, i have every good intention to eat regulary but i seem to be too busy with people and things i forget to eat. I take slim fast out with me but when i come home its still in my bag as i have been too busy/forget to drink it.

Sorry for blabbing and ranting on. hope your all well xxx
 
Firstly, well done on your weight loss so far. Even though you've stuck for a while, at least it hasn't been a gain. So you must still be eating much less than before.
I'm not surprised you're struggling with all that going on. I have a poorly parent too and find it hard enough to step back and concentrate on myself. It must be so much harder with a 2nd parent being possibly ill and also trying to help your sister.
I know you say you're trying to keep everything and everyone together, but does that all have to be down to you? Sometimes we struggle with not being able to control everything around us when it's better for us to just let go a bit. You'd be surprised how well our relatives can actually cope if we just let them. Remember too that it's not long since you had an operation and you should be looking after yourself. I have a tendency to find excuses to keep me busy with anything other than watching my diet. Even though they are very valid excuses I know that I am using them to give me a reason to reach for the chocolate.

How about going back to basics and filling out a food diary? If you're forgetting to eat then set an alarm on your mobile phone to remind you. You're halfway there already because you're being careful to take the slimfast out with you.

Good luck with the Ann Summers!
 
I was wondering where you got to sweetheart xx Don't worry, it's easy to see how diffficult things have been for you and just after your surgery, it must be really hardgoingxx
You know some of us are logging food every day so please feel free to join in with that if you want to. It might help keep your focus (or a little of it) on looking after YOU in the midst of everything going on in your family.

We're around for a natter, or if you want to offload in a diary on here too that can be very theraputic.

All of us are trying to leave the old coping strategies of using food when life throws us curveballs hun and maybe we can be a sounding board for you when you have had a bad or challenging day.

Hugs and keep in touch x
 
Thank you so much ladies, i think i really need time to focus on me. Sounds silly but i really didnt even think about filling in a diary, i will be doing that and really watching what im eating.

Actually venting on here has made me feel better already and hopefully will put me back on track. I know this is the place for me to be to keep me going the the right direction.

Thanks for your kind and supportive messages xxx
 
Its great, felt so good to get off my chest and good to know that im not alone and you all know and have had similar struggles.
And so good to get suggestions to get back on track, i cant believe i didnt even think to right food diary.


Is it ok that i dont struggle to eat anything with my band?? I know some people say they struggle with white bread etc and i seem to be able to eat everything i try. Or will this only happen after fill? Only ever struggled once with some chicken but it was really dry (MIL cooks everything for way too long).
 
Being able to eat a fair bit once the swelling from the surgery went down suprised the heck out of me as well!!!

If I had known at the time I would have definately joined a club like Rosemary Conleys or WW or even just calorie counted from the beginning to help keep me on track.
It does feel like nothing has changed to a degree but the fact that you struggled a little with the chicken shows that just by being in there empty, your band will give a slight restrictive effect.

So that means that if you do follow a calorie controlled diet it will be so much easier to feel satisfied than without a band at all.

A lot of us banders (at least a large number of us) are battling with a milestone we can't seem to crack...getting close then going backwards. You are in good company there hun!!
If you have a read of the Teenage Kicks thread within the banders bit, that is where some of us are trying to help each other specifically to bust through a block in lowest weight...might be worth a read for you.

Together we can keep trying and tweaking what we do and one by one, we will overcome the seemingly impossible and get to where we all want to be x
 
Thanks Neen, really helpful :)

I will be sure to read the thread and will be catching up on what i have missed recently.

I feel so much better today, thank you xxx:grouphugg::grouphugg:
 
glad your back sweetie i was wondering how you were doing .
sorry you have so much on your plate ( so to speak ) at the moment - sending big hugs.
but your doing so well just keep focused, your know we all here to help and support anyway we can

xxxx
 
Thanks Christine x

How you doing hun?

I cant believe how much better i feel today, just from off loading it on here. :)
 
i was the same yesterday , having a real down day no sooner had i posted on here i felt better just getting it off my chest.

im doing ok , managing fine just keep having the usual panics of am i eatting to much am i eatting the right things but not doing to bad.

xx
 
Hi Leanne, I've just started a diary on here last night and I was really struggling after having my band fitted in January. I know it's early days yet but so far I have found writing stuff down (albeit using a keyboard!) to be really helpful and I've made a promise to myself to use it whenever I feel the need, kind of therapy but cheaper, lol. What I have found, and I'm sure you will agree, is that the support of your online friends on this site is invaluable, whether you're having a good or bad day. We're all here if you need us hun xx
 
ldavidson84 said:
Hi Jo

how you doin hun???

xxx

I'm ok, can't get my head round smaller portions! I get lots stuck, even weetabix feels tight! I'm convinced its moved, having my first fill on sat under X-ray, hope to have my mind put at ease!

You have done really well losing so much weight since your op, you should feel proud if yourself! Hope your folks turn a corner real soon! Jo xx
 
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