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Wasn't Quite Sure How To Take This...

Mrs Quiggle

New Member
Opened my messages on Facebook this evening and found this PM.

Hi Kate ! I hope you are well , I just wanted to make you aware of something but don't want to cause any friction either so I'm just going to be honest and hope that you understand
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you have done so well losing weight with your gastric band ! You look amazing and we are all sooo pleased for you , however I do think that maybe you could take into consideration your friends who are unhappy with their weight and who can't get a gastric band
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im sorry to bring this up but I thought In boxing you would be the best way to make you aware that although we are all happy for you the constant statuses seem to be hilighting other people's unhappiness . I hope you don't take this the wrong way ,
Many thanks
 
Possible responses -- either via PM to her or openly on your status:

1. I have NOT had a gastric band

2. If you would like more info about bariatric surgery, all the different types, low cost funding options or NHS criteria please do let me know, I am happy to share all the knowledge I have gained !!

:)
 
Quite unbelievable. You must really look great to stir up all this jealousy Surely people are not that shallow not to be pleased for you.
 
Opened my messages on Facebook this evening and found this PM.

Hi Kate ! I hope you are well , I just wanted to make you aware of something but don't want to cause any friction either so I'm just going to be honest and hope that you understand
blank.gif
you have done so well losing weight with your gastric band ! You look amazing and we are all sooo pleased for you , however I do think that maybe you could take into consideration your friends who are unhappy with their weight and who can't get a gastric band
blank.gif
im sorry to bring this up but I thought In boxing you would be the best way to make you aware that although we are all happy for you the constant statuses seem to be hilighting other people's unhappiness . I hope you don't take this the wrong way ,
Many thanks
good grief!!! If people are happy, they write it on their facebook status, to be honest Kate, I dont know what to say!!!
 
I am shocked. How horrible for you. Agree with Sharonimo. I am constantly amazed at how horrible people are about weight issues. I was sickened by the Loose Women prog on Monday. They spouted off their very uninformed opinions on why people have weight issues, most of which was garbage. Funny how Anorexia gets so much attention & gravitas yet we don't!
 
Deary, deary me, a real case of the 'Green eyed monster'. You certainly have upset a few people! Thought Facebook was for friends! xx
 
Can't believe what I am reading there. Thats an outrageous statement.
You post about how happy you are all you want. The people who are unable to get their funding yet or not able to have their ops for any other reason should understand your happiness because hopefully they will be in the same position one day.
Ignore it and carry on.
Lynne x
 
Well I would have taken it as:

Hi Kate, hope you are well *big slap across the face*!!

They are your facebook statuses, real friends will really be happy for you.

Others may be jealous or not very clued up on the procedure you had BUT its good to talk, isnt it? Im sure you would answer any questions they have.

Are they close friends? xx
 
Cheeky cow!

I think i would say something like; if you dont like my status updates, you can click the drop arrow at the side and hide them. Tell those that dont like them instead of trying to bring me down. Its my fb page and i will write what i like.
 
I really hope you're not feeling bad now Kate, how can "friends" not be happy for you, please, please dont stop your status's xxx
 
Wowsers, this really just highlights that people think any kind of bariatric surgery is a cure all and requiees no effort on your part, despite the fact you have quite literally worked your arse off to get where you are - an email like this is right up there with I know you have lost an amazing amount of weifgt but don't you think you look a bit gaunt ... Is reply that anyone offended or upset can choose not to see my updates chin up lovely xx
 
Add us, we will happily be very pleased for you, well we are anyway, you are doing fantastic!! :D xxx
 
Quite unbelievable. You must really look great to stir up all this jealousy.

There are some people where I work who I think are *already* jealous that I am having an op even before I have had it .... altho none of them will quite come out and say it.

One has gone as far as to say "I wish you weren't having that drastic surgery Sharon, it's so dangerous and you did so well last time on Rosemary Conley" [this person also forwarded me by email a Daily Mail story of a bypass death -- gee whizz as if I didn't know that was a possibility!] -- last time was nearly 5 years ago and after more than six months of constant effort I had only lost 4 stone and was down to 18 stone (from 22) .... but gradually crept back up again. Since then they have all seen me try various other diets including Lighter Life, and coming in to work with my shapes and soups for several months (the temporarily "lost" weight of which went back on much quicker).

All of the people who have shown small signs of jealousy have weight problems themselves.

If they could just be open about it, I could give them the answers that they might want to hear ..... but they are too caught up in their own jealousy to ask.

One of the ladies who gives me "odd" looks every time she sees me was 19 stone a few years ago and managed to diet her way down to 14 stone with Weight Watchers ..... unfortunately since then she has come across the problems that befall so many of us (1) not being able to reach goal, and (2) regaining ..... she is now back up above 15 stone and annoyed (probably both at herself and the fact that I am getting this "magic stomach op" --- oh yes I am having 80% of my stomach removed forever out of personal choice --- please do all roll up for that one next week when the Weight Watchers scales don't say what you want (!!!!).

I think the person in question would be "borderline" for NHS funding .... but she is married to a man who earns megabucks and they live alone (ie DINKY) in a fabulous 4 bed show home in Hertfordshire ..... I am sure she could probably afford one of the private options if she actually wanted to pursue that as an option.

But some people seem to like being unhappy with their lot, quietly seething away rather than DOING SOMETHING about it for themselves !!!

They TOO could also have surgery if they wanted if they were bothered enough to research either the NHS or private funding options !!!!!!
 
New Status -
I dont want to cause any friction, so im going to be honest and i hope you understand...in the past few months i have gone through life changing surgery, i have been open and honest with everyone and completely understand how other overweight people may be feeling, if i can help any of my friends then i will, with advice on my personal journey. If i have offended anyone, this is facebook, and a place to put my thoughts, if i have offended anyone, please feel free to remove me from your friends list....Yours sincerely....Kate.


*nobbers* ((((kate)))) <<<<skinny hug ;)
 
It was the daughter of a friend who sent it to me. I have been friends with the woman for years, funnily enough we met on a parenting forum and she lives in Wales. We've met up a good few times, there were a few of us. Although I rarely use the forum now I do still keep in touch with quite a few people who I've become good friends with and even holiday'd with. I knocked both her and her daughter off my friends list and then she messaged me to apologise for her daughter, (21 and size 10) I told her that I would leave it up to her if she added me back on as a friend but that I wouldn't be stopping my status updates or my diet. She said she has asked to be referred for bariatrics but has been turned down.

I posted the daughters message to me on my wall omitting her name of course and had about 30 replies from friends in total disgust about it. I even had messages from old school friends who were on my list. When she'd added me back as a friend she posted on the list of messages that it was her daughter who had posted it and that she was a lovely girl and she'd been a bit down and the daughter was just trying to do the right thing but people started to make comments about it so I deleted the post. Was good to see that so many people were so proud of me for what I'd done. I don't care enough about this person to let it effect me too much. Was just a bit amazed that someone would pm you and tell you not to post about your happy times just incase there was someon out there who was having a bad time.

Kate x
 
New Status -
I dont want to cause any friction, so im going to be honest and i hope you understand...in the past few months i have gone through life changing surgery, i have been open and honest with everyone and completely understand how other overweight people may be feeling, if i can help any of my friends then i will, with advice on my personal journey. If i have offended anyone, this is facebook, and a place to put my thoughts, if i have offended anyone, please feel free to remove me from your friends list....Yours sincerely....Kate.


*nobbers* ((((kate)))) <<<<skinny hug ;)

Thats pretty much what I put on my post with her message underneath. I stated that I didn't intend offending anyone with my status updates about me weight loss so if anyone wasn't happy to read them please remove me from their friends list.
 
good for you Kate :) xxx
 
MissyMustDoIt said:
New Status -
I dont want to cause any friction, so im going to be honest and i hope you understand...in the past few months i have gone through life changing surgery, i have been open and honest with everyone and completely understand how other overweight people may be feeling, if i can help any of my friends then i will, with advice on my personal journey. If i have offended anyone, this is facebook, and a place to put my thoughts, if i have offended anyone, please feel free to remove me from your friends list....Yours sincerely....Kate.

*nobbers* ((((kate)))) <<<<skinny hug ;)

Ha ha I'm gonna keep this one I have a few that are very off with me about having my op

Sent from my iPhone using WLSurgery
 
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