WEEPY

[tink75]

I had my first counceling today and now I feel completely emotional and weepy. I really thought I was ok cause I always try and stay positive about everything - but today I cried for nearly the full hour. I really don't know how to get passed the guilt of putting my family through 4 weeks of hell. They are amazing and supportive but it's me with the confusion. I just want to be with my husband and children ALL the time and have even kept the boys off school recently. being a school teacher myself I know how damaging this can be - but I feel like I need to get that month back with them. The counceller was AMAZING and so understanding - she says it is completely understandable that I feel this way as my eyes have been opened to the realities that can happen to my family - even though really unlikely.

Just wondered if anyone had a bad experience after surgery and what they did to move past it cause that's all I want - a normal life again - whatever that is. I don't regret my surgery at all but my head is sssoooooooooo messed up it's unreal:sigh::sigh::sigh::sigh::sigh::sigh::sigh:

 

[jaynefrances]

I'm pre-surgery but didn't want to read and run.
Sorry you had such a bad experience with your surgery. As your counsellor has said, the emotions you are experiencing are perfectly natural and quite common followin traumatic life experiences. You will be more sensitive / anxious initially about the fragility of our lives and how easy things can be turned on their heads. But take solace from the positive aspects within your life and gradually these emotions will fade more into the background. With the right support you will be able to use these experiences to increase your resilience in the future and it sounds as if you have good professional and informal support available to you. The counselling will exhaust you at first but it will get easier over time.

 

[salski]

Hiya hun

I had 5 sessions of councelling after my op. For the first 3 sessions I did nothing but cry and regret my operation. Ended up coming hom so low I struggled to go to work and back to the sessions. I was so lucky to have a counsellor who was understanding and helpful.
The last 2 sessions were amazing. I cant explain why I did what I did or how....but I went in with an open mind and came away feeling amazing. I realised that although things affect us, only I can change my attitude and If I continue to mope, or feel low or sad and take my bypass as a mistake - nothing will change............so I decided to change.
As I say this might not be good advice as I cant explain what changed...just that it took a while, but it did change, and I cope day to day the best I have in my whole life.
Im so grateful and so pleased I changed my outlook.
***********Please note**********

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH CRYING! Crying is cool! And its good and its helpful. If you wanna cry...baby you cry!
Only you can change your outlook, and with help from your counsellor, family and friends...even online you can change. You will get there...it might be rough at first, but take stock of you, and listen to your head, your heart and your body. x

 

[bungle1999]

the very fact that you are finding the councelling so draining and emotional would indicate to me that it is WORKING. Like any councelling, it often has to seem worse for it to be better ( certainly been the case for me)!
Also, don't beat yourself up about being low. I hit what was called by my GP the post op blues and have read of others who had the same. You are still coming to terms with major changes and realisations in your life. BUT, hang in there. It is so worth it.

xxx

 

[Ulidia]

I have not had councelling and didn't realise some people needed it. I now see that this is the case and I fully understand the reasons now they are pointed out.

I suppose all life changing events have an emotional side. For what it's worth, hang in there, this must be better than the hell we went through before embarking on our journey.

U

 

[marky v]

i'll be honest, i went thro a bout of post op blues about 4-6 weeks ago, at the time had lost 7 stone and should of been shouting from the rooftops, but felt miserable as sin, have thank goodness got over that low point, feel much more positive, but our bodies physically and psychologically are going through major changes, our reliance on food has gone, our bodies are changing shape for ever, it's alot to deal with, so emotions run away from us, best of luck in your sessions, i hope they continue to provide you valuable support x

 

[dreamofbeingslim]

Hi I haven't had councelling but I was diagnosed with depression about 15months ago. Every time I went to see the dr I cried my eyes out, it is because by talking about it it is bringing it to the surface. I would also sit at home and just start crying for no apparent reason. Some days I would think there is no end to this it is awful am I ever going to feel normal again. Although it is difficult to believe now for you it does honestly. Just take things slowly and try as best you can to continue your daily life no matter how hard. I was off work for 3 weeks and signed back part time, the first time I went in I was shaking like a leaf but I felt really good in the end. I know you don't want to be away from your children but it is best to keep their routine as normal as possible because it will just cause them more worry. My youngest picked up on how I was feeling alot and I felt it affected him big time. Anyway enough of me rambling on. Good luck with everything and remember it is fine to cry.

 

[Postop]

At about 6 weeks out I had a terrible week of depression. What had I done? I felt awful, I missed food, was I going to die?

Thankfully, I worked through it with help.

It's not unusual to feel this way. Keep up with your couseling. I hope you feel better soon.

 

[tink75]

Thanks all for your fantastic advice and support. I do hope that this isn't the first signs of depression. I am sooooooo happy with my surgery and the changes so I can't understand why I can't let the past go. I think I have got to say what happened happened and now it's time to focus on the positive aspects of the surgery. I am so grateful to have been given the opportunity to change my life and understand how truely blessed I am to be here today with such a loving supportive family - sometimes the negatives blind us from the positives even though we know how lucky we are. Thanks again xxx

 

[dreamofbeingslim]

Thanks all for your fantastic advice and support. I do hope that this isn't the first signs of depression. I am sooooooo happy with my surgery and the changes so I can't understand why I can't let the past go. I think I have got to say what happened happened and now it's time to focus on the positive aspects of the surgery. I am so grateful to have been given the opportunity to change my life and understand how truely blessed I am to be here today with such a loving supportive family - sometimes the negatives blind us from the positives even though we know how lucky we are. Thanks again xxx

You sound alot more positive now. I doubt it is depression but just try your best to keep to your normal routine. I am sure things will get much better for you soon, take care.