what am i doing to myself

[Fizzpot]

right then, I havent posted on here for a couple of weeks mostly because im too embarrased and dont feel like I deserve anybodies support.
since my surgery the first week was great - I started to lose weight - second week was ok , went onto soft foods - seemed to maintain the little weight I had lost.
week three and week four back to my old habbits - picking and eating the wrong foods. Ate some food - got full, then within an hour i was hungry again so picked - that continued, ive been out for lots of meals because of family birthdays and i try to make good food choices when im out but then i just pick afterwards.I dont get any pain when I feel full - not once have I had anything stuck as a warning to make sure I dont make the same mistake twice. I havent had my first fill yet thats due next week - I know my band is working and doing its job as i do get fuller quicker - but that full feeling goes too quick. i think because im so wrapped up with thinking its not going to work for me im sabotauging myself. im really scared that when i go for my fill the nurse is going to tell me off big time. I just feel helpless. Sorry to be a bore.

 

[Bluebutterflier]

Oh Fizz, not long now till your first fill on the 22nd May...

I understand where your at completely....Ive had a bigger appetite and feel hungry also.

But ive been calorie counting and sticking to 3 meals a day with 2 snacks....(usually fruit)...

I did have one day where I just wanted to pig out...So I ate a bowl od Satsumas...ironically they all added up to under 200 calories lol....So perhaps put some more fruit near you to pick at?

Ive found that the Quaker oats little containers that you just add water too, are amazing, they are just over 200 calories, but creamy porridge, and with a few flavours, my favourite is sweet cinnamon. And this fills me up in the morning.

Another thing is - WATER - Squash -Tea -Coffee -anything you can drink thats either no added sugar, with a sweetner or low in calories....Usually when your feeling hungry all the time, its cos your actually cos your dehydrated.

 

[chrisa]

, i have been like that to i have made no secret of the fact that i have craved sweet, the dietician said as long as its onloy a tiny amount an dit hasnt mad me dump then its fine. Well you know what you have to do, being able to admit it to others should help a little, it was never going to be easy an dit never will be but need to use the help we are given ring your team before next week just for advice if you need to, i'm a bypasser so a bander might be better for you. xx

 

[Fizzpot]

thanks ladies

i keep telling myself to follow the slimming world - to make sure im watching what i eat that way im still sort of in control.
ive been telling myself for the past two weeks and i havent. I will buy some fruit tomorrow and give it a blast. this is going to sound disgraceful but since my band i dont think ive had any fruit - apart from tonight where i had a handfull of strawberries.
Throughout my life ive always been on a diet and when im good im really good i feel good about myself - but when im bad its terrible i dont feel like i have any control sometimes it does last for weeks i know whats happening but cant stop it, i eat when im not hungry and cant stop myself - im seeing a psychologist on friday so im hoping things will only get better with this and the fill next week. i hate the fact that food controls my life.

 

[mariew]

Fizzpot, don't beat yourself up, you are doing really well, you haven't got any restriction yet. Your band is empty. They dont fill it untill you have healed internally and the swelling is gone down. Whatever you lose in this time is down to you and your will power alone. Trust me, when you've had a fill you will notice the difference. x

 

[Bluebutterflier]

Fizz
Stop thinking of it as a diet....Get yourself on Myfitnesspal....download the app for your phone...if you have an app phone..if not, when u have eaten, write the calories down....

I eat low fat and low sugar foods...I dont stop myself if I want something nice, I just allow for it in my calorie intake....and its working...Slowly...

If you stick to just less of your calorie intake, your bound to lose weight....

Think about it...instead of beating yourself up about it.

 

[JO28172]

Plan ahead. Organise tomorrow's food in advance thinking low carb high protein and stick to it! It will soon shift

 

[flutterby1966]

I know it's easy for us to say, but most of us have been (and sometimes do still have days of being) where you are now. There will always be a level of will power / self restraint needed with any lifestyle choice. The band is not on our head!! As has already been said by jo and bb, plan ahead (that really does help) and an app like myfitnesspal can help you do that.

Have faith, and rather than let the food control your life, you take control

 

[Fizzpot]

Thanks ladies! I took your advice and filled in my fitness pal, please don't be too horrified - I've had 1802 calories today, main problem is snacking and cappuccino. I had two long walks today approx hour n half in total. Tomorrow I'm going to continue with the diary and really rein in the snacking. Got my psycho appointment Friday and my fill on Tuesday hopefully this will be a recipe for success

 

[JO28172]

Every time you want a snack maybe try satsuma or sugar free jelly until you can break the habit?

 

[Fizzpot]

Thanks Jo, I do need to go shopping so will get some of those ready made no sugar jellies as well as satsumas

 

[yviec1972]

Hi, I'm new to this thread but wanted to add that no matter if you feel dissapointed in yourself you always deserve the support from us all. We have all been on the food rollercoaster and it sometimes most of the battle is inside our heads. I hope your glad you posted now because we all need someone to lean on sometimes xx

 

[stubad]

perhaps a band was the wrong choice for you, i know it is extreme but perhaps because you know you can eat like that, you do, have you considered a bypass or sleeve ???

 

[snack]

Aww fizz pot you haven't cheated I hate that word , don't look at it as a diet look at it as a lifestyle change as when I'm on a DIET u always get in the vicious circle of oh I've cheated again so I ll start again tomorrow , and as for calories I found by having more calories I have lost more , when I was sticking to 800/900 cals I never lost any thing but buy having more I'm losing by the day. Good luck and keep your chin up xxx

 

[JO28172]

Aww fizz pot you haven't cheated I hate that word , don't look at it as a diet look at it as a lifestyle change as when I'm on a DIET u always get in the vicious circle of oh I've cheated again so I ll start again tomorrow , and as for calories I found by having more calories I have lost more , when I was sticking to 800/900 cals I never lost any thing but buy having more I'm losing by the day. Good luck and keep your chin up xxx

I'm sorry but for me the only way this has worked is to think I'm on diet from day 1. I know ultimately it's a lifestyle change we require but to go from fat foods to that ....well I would have blown it in the first round. By thinking diet I've focused on getting the salads the protein etc in me and watched the carb intake..they kill you! And i tracked from day 1! even now on my last stone I've needed to join ww to keep me focused. Let's be honest ladies we are all different but one things for sure this take damn hard work! Watching the food, getting exercising...all alien to our former selves. but you will find what works for you in the end. slowly 7monfh down the line I can now say I choose healthy more out of routine n habit which is great, never thought I'd say that...but even now have moments of weakness and if I wasn't tracking I'd soon slip up!!! Good luck all x

 

[snack]

Don't get me wrong jo I still track using mfp and I always know my cals to a tee , sadly I think too many of us go into this band business thinking its going to be a walk in the park and it's anything but, I have eaten things I know I shouldn't have but lucky for me I'm in the right state of mind too kick myself up the bum at the moment , but if I walked around for the rest of my life thinking I woz on a DIET it would drive me mad xx

 

[JO28172]

Lol. I've accepted it now my life has to be a forever diet. Great thing is when your getting into size 12s clothes that completely overrides the need now to live off crap like I did before. You will all do it! But I'd say def keep on tracking! As that odd pinch of this and that soon adds up! That's the downside of the band in that we can still have high sugar foods, and that's where restraint has to come in. But that being said, it's all about moderation! I've always had a Freddo frog as my choc fix....two mouthfuls and it's gone but keeps me happy and on track!
Just been to gym and had my breakfast...oh how life has changed from the old fat me

 

[shelleymarie]

Hey Fizz, I'm new but just wanted to say don't beat yourself up. If you do it will only repeat the cycle. Keep using my fitness pal, I was using it just before I started the pre op diet and found it very useful. It was good to keep an eye on what I was eating without actually having to count the calories myself, it soon helps you learn calorie values and makes you make better choices. Aim to stick with the calories it suggests you eat every day and you should lose at least 2 pound a week. If you can do better than that, then that's even better. Hopefully when you have your band feel you will do even better.

I think it is fantastic you are going to see a psychologist, it really is great to get to the bottom of these issues, if you can you will be much more likely to succeed. I plan to do exactly the same as I lost over 6 stone without weight loss surgery a few years ago, I was cocky and confident I would never put it on again but I never dealt with the issues I had with food and the minute something bad happened in my life I put it back on and then some. If you get extra psychological help, along with when you have your band fill, and keeping a food diary, you will make a success of this. Also never feel like you don't deserve support, I don't think anyone of us who need/would have had wls if we didn't know what it feels like to have issues with food.

Good luck

Shelley x

 

[BlueDiamond]

right then, I havent posted on here for a couple of weeks mostly because im too embarrased and dont feel like I deserve anybodies support.
since my surgery the first week was great - I started to lose weight - second week was ok , went onto soft foods - seemed to maintain the little weight I had lost.
week three and week four back to my old habbits - picking and eating the wrong foods. Ate some food - got full, then within an hour i was hungry again so picked - that continued, ive been out for lots of meals because of family birthdays and i try to make good food choices when im out but then i just pick afterwards.I dont get any pain when I feel full - not once have I had anything stuck as a warning to make sure I dont make the same mistake twice. I havent had my first fill yet thats due next week - I know my band is working and doing its job as i do get fuller quicker - but that full feeling goes too quick. i think because im so wrapped up with thinking its not going to work for me im sabotauging myself. im really scared that when i go for my fill the nurse is going to tell me off big time. I just feel helpless. Sorry to be a bore.

Never feel embarrassed or feel your not worth of any support. You will not have any major restriction until you start having your fills hun so that is quite normal in the process route. If your going to pick , have fruit or veggies , mini baby bells etc nothing thats going to do some damage weight wise. & your not boring anyone hun its quite normal process your going through, good luck on your first fill, wishing you all the best xx Julie

 

[Fizzpot]

Thank you everyone for all your support and tips, I really do appreciate it. I had my appointment today with the psych and all though I felt embarrassed n that I should not have been there it was nice to get things off my chest. They first suggested anti depressants which is something I personally never want to take- I dismissed this idea straight away. He then mentioned cognitive behaviour therapy , which will hopefully retrain my mind. I've been given a food diary to complete for them - when I eat or snack or binge I need to write how I'm feeling, where I was and so on for three weeks till my next appointment. My fill is on Tuesday so I'm looking forward to that too. Thanks again all xxxx