A few years ago I spent an entire year sitting in a room every day with two therapists and 5 other service users. We had the sort of group therapy where you don't get to sit there and say ''it's so unfair, poor me'' etc etc, which is exactly what I wanted to do for the first few months. Instead we were encouraged to challenge each other's perceptions and share our experiences so that we could learn from each other. It was a very difficult but rewarding process.
It has however left me with a tendency towards tough love and telling it how it is (as far as I see it), so perhaps I tend not to moderate my own posts as much as I should.
I know that as a pre-opper I'm only able to guess at how hard it is after surgery. But when I read about other people's post op struggles with eating it does still sound very familiar to what I struggle with pre-op. Perhaps just different quantities are involved.
I suppose that when you've gone through something as extreme as surgery to try and change your life for the better, it must be even more upsetting when things go wrong.
Yorkiegal you are lucky, i can't do the tough love. I'd much rather coat it with sugar and get you to eat the pill with a smile rather than a grimace...
I can't speak for the person who started the post as in all honesty i don't know her that well (spoke once or twice on fb briefly but that is it). However knowing another couple of bypassers like myself who are struggling let me explain something that i hope has come across in other threads i've started......
When you do the research for weight loss surgery, we look for the one that will benefit and enhance our life to the max. Whether it bypass, band or slieve you take the lifeline to a route that will finally let you shift the weight you've struggled with for a long time. In my case almost a 1/4 of a century. You do all of your research, you hear of wounds splitting open (which worried me being open surgery), of people not being able to eat anything, of throwing up outside because you ate something that stuck.... All of these horror stories you hear and you read and you decide as horrific as they sound you'll risk it, you'll go for it because nothing can be as bad (this was for me anyway) as the thought of my big fat coffin being pushed down the aisle at the crematorium with my children walking behind and the whispers of ''it was her weight in the end''....
Absolutely none of this is as devastating as actually going through the surgery, and believe me having your 13 year old daughter asking if your gonna die (whilst her little sister is listening) is rough. None of this is as rough as getting on the scales week after week and the needle not moving. Especially if you know you make healthy choices and follow the rules..... Yet again you feel like the fat failure and that feeling can cause a post of frustration such as the one involved...
As someone else said, probably Cherry, perhaps we should mark our threads as 'sensitive' 'private' 'rant grrrrr' so people know what kind of response we need/want....
Either way, we are all in the same boat, whether pre op, post op or just considering surgery....
Knowing post oppers that i do who did little or no research and still don't know much, i have to say i personally appreciate the input from EVERYONE on this site because they've all been lurking.....
