I think I need a reality check (and a bit of moral support).

[fjsinc]

Hi all. I'm not one to post about emotional issues, but today I feel lousy. When I was a teenager I suffered from depression, but for over 10 years I have been not just stable but positively 'happy'. But now I'm off work sick after the surgery, and getting anxious.

I'm three weeks post op, and everyone says I'm doing well. I haven't been sick or dumped. I've been careful what i eat, and followed my teams advice. I'm finding that my food and fluid intakes do not cause me too many problems. I even lost 4 lbs in the dreaded 3rd week weigh in.

BUT, I now find my brain in a juxtaposition. I'm taking in around 600-750 kcals a day with around 60-65g of protein. And I think I'm eating to much!! All my life I wanted to eat less, and now i can I feel like I should be eating as little as I can (insane brain). But on the other hand, I know I feel shaky and unwell if I dont eat this amount (sane brain).

The perfectionist in me just wants to do everything 'right'. I'm just so scared that I'm going to do something wrong and sabotage myself.

And to top it off, I lost my coping mechanism - food! Even though I was desperate to rid myself of the crutch, I find myself at a bit of a loose end. I have lost my inclination to turn to it again however.

I guess what I want to say is: this is normal right? I hope this is just the emotional backlash after the op and loosing two and a half stone in five weeks.

 

[Paula Garner]

Hi all. I'm not one to post about emotional issues, but today I feel lousy. When I was a teenager I suffered from depression, but for over 10 years I have been not just stable but positively 'happy'. But now I'm off work sick after the surgery, and getting anxious.

I'm three weeks post op, and everyone says I'm doing well. I haven't been sick or dumped. I've been careful what i eat, and followed my teams advice. I'm finding that my food and fluid intakes do not cause me too many problems. I even lost 4 lbs in the dreaded 3rd week weigh in.

BUT, I now find my brain in a juxtaposition. I'm taking in around 600-750 kcals a day with around 60-65g of protein. And I think I'm eating to much!! All my life I wanted to eat less, and now i can I feel like I should be eating as little as I can (insane brain). But on the other hand, I know I feel shaky and unwell if I dont eat this amount (sane brain).

The perfectionist in me just wants to do everything 'right'. I'm just so scared that I'm going to do something wrong and sabotage myself.

And to top it off, I lost my coping mechanism - food! Even though I was desperate to rid myself of the crutch, I find myself at a bit of a loose end. I have lost my inclination to turn to it again however.

I guess what I want to say is: this is normal right? I hope this is just the emotional backlash after the op and loosing two and a half stone in five weeks.

Sounds to me like your doing great. That's a really good amount of protein for only 3 weeks post op. I panicked at my last appointment when I was told I wasn't eating enough calories. My dietician said I should be eating around a 1000 a day. I struggle to eat 850/900!!

Just keep doing what your doing and you'll be fine. Focus on the positives. Often if we eat less the weight loss can stall, due to not enough calories xx

 

[Judith4]

Oh fjsinc I understand how you are feeling. I too am terrified of doing things 'wrong', of wasting the surgery and not achieving what is expected and what I hope for. It is hard to push these feelings away especially if you are home with time on your hands. I don't know if how you are feeling is normal or not but I do think that fear of the unknown is and that is what we have stepped into. It's like stepping over the edge of a ridge and not knowing where your feet will land. I just know that I now have a chance and so do you we need not to over think what is happening and take one day at a time and celebrate the hurdles we cross. I hope you feel happier soon and less confused and less scared or nervous of the future.

 

[shelleymarie]

How you are feeling is very normal. When you start losing weight rapidly you are body is being flooding with hormones. Add losing your comfort in food, having just had major surgery and all these changes you are going to feel all sorts of emotions and feelings. Don't fight them, just know that it is normal. Sounds like you are doing brilliantly food and drink wise. I understand the perfectionism issue, I'm the same but you won't be able to perfect all the time but working hard will mean you will continue to do well. Keep doing what you are doing, and go with the ups and downs. They get fewer and further between as you adjust to your new body. Well done xx

 

[Ruthiep]

I'm a sleever but I remember feeling very low about 2 weeks out. I had a bad attack of Buyer's Remorse and felt generally miserable. Then I attended to the vitamins I was taking and found that most of them were weak and basically useless. Once I changed them for more potent ones I started feeling so much better, the world looked like a brighter place really quickly.

I hope you feel better soon.

 

[ThinnerJemima]

You are doing great. This is a long term weight loss for life not a quick race. We all have ups and downs, and try to focus on the ups.

Several stalls seem par for the course but your body will catch up when it's ready. Just keep up the good work.

:grouphugg:

 

[fjsinc]

Thanks for the reality check guys. I knew mood swings would be part of the process, its just taken me a bit by surprise! Haha. I'm such a up beat person normally, I find the dark days pretty frightening. Even though I have a fantastic network of people around me, it's invaluable to be able to talk to people who have real experience.
I dont think this horrible weather is helping, as all I want to do it get out in my garden and potter around.

 

[Lincs Lass]

I wonder whether a part of it is also the sudden drop in adrenalin. For months, years in some cases, we are on adrenalin waiting for a call, a letter etc. Then all of a sudden it's done. No more being on edge and waiting.

I'm having a bit of a bleurgghhhh day today and I've a feeling that's what it is. No sense of expectation etc.

(Plus of course all the other things people have mentioned) xx