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no one cares

bigun

bigun

New Member
hi gang

has any one here been told that we dont care ive just come back from a family bbq a bit miffed off with with the family i know my parents know why im doing this but a few members have had a right ding dong one even told i should more dieting and go to the gym more but like i said easy said than done one told me how she lost 2stone in six months so i laffed at her and said that my last hospital stay i lost 6 stone cos the meds messed with me 28 days of just liquids but i lose 6 and gain 8 it just goes to show that ppl dont care im feed up with ppl who dont understand im not lazy i have worked in the tyre trade since 94 to 09 in the last to years YES my weight has gone up from 25 stone to 46 im not proud of it i was shocked when i was told in march im 6"9`so i carry it well i have tried every thing my gp has set before me i loose some keep it off the gain more i cant help being fat but i am doing this to prolong my life i have a wife and beauitful son who i love so much this not just cos i can have it done RANT OVER
 
Sorry people are so insensitive and uncaring Bigun - but things will get better in time. I see that your due surgery in early October, so not too long to wait; only a matter of weeks......hang on in there hun....things will definately get much better for you.

By this time next year so called friends and family wont recognise you - then you`ll be the one calling the shots!



Take care hun x







Love Kat x
 
Dont worry about these people, the can not really be real friends as they will support you other wise. I told my friends tonight and where very supportive, but knowing the girls would of had a good gossip about it when i was gone, but i dont care, I am doing this for me and my daughter so sod everyone else mate, do it for you, your lovely wife and son xx
 
Ah, I'm so sorry your family are not being supportive. Unfortunately it's always the least well informed people who feel qualified to pass judgement on us. Perhaps if they knew that only 1% of super morbidly obese people, and 5% of morbidly obese people lose a significant amount of weight and maintain that loss by diet and exercise alone, then they wouldn't be so quick to make these remarks. I wonder if you were on the other end of the scale and had anorexia and were receiving medical help to overcome that and gain weight, whether they would also object? I doubt that.
You know that without this surgery your life will probably be cut short, of a lesser quality, and probably plagued with illness. This is a way for you to see your son grow up and to spend a long healthy life with your wife. Don't get into an argument with people who don't get it. just say " thank you for your concern, but this is my life and my decision, it's not open for discussion"
Good luck with ypur op and the rest of your journey. There are people who care, but perhaps you just haven't met them face to face. x
 
People that have never been really over weight find it very easy to judge and tell us what we should be doing. In reality they have no idea of what we eat daily or how much exercise we get, how active we are, they delight in stereotyping us as all the same, lazy, over eaters that dont do anything when in fact they couldnt be further from the truth!
The people that think they know more about you usually have no idea and they delight in stating the obvious as if we have no idea about diets and have never tried dieting in our lives.

You are doing what is right for you, ignore the people that have no idea about you or your life. What matters most is you and the reason you want wls.

Your doing this for yourself no one else. Good Luck with your wls journey in the future xx
 
But you do care!You care that you cant do the 'normal' stuff in life,that you will die early,that your family suffers,that you are just existing,that you want more from life.Ignore them all,they have no idea what its like to walk in a fat persons extra wide shoes!Roll on October for you my friend and your new life,you wont regret a single thing apart from not having it earlier.Its not easy and you will falter we all do but its like all you xmas' in one.I promise you that this time next year you will look and feel fabulous and your family will be behind you 100%.Maz x
 
tbh that side of the family i never cared for there so up themselfs always giving there opinion on matters that they know very little about i only go to theses thing for my granparent but since my grand father past away last year from cancer it harder to say no ....

im fed up being fat im unhappy cos im fat i want to play football go biking with my son i know what people think when they see me but there wrong
 
Ugh people really bug me when they think they know what's best for you. People always did the same to me. I would just tell them thanks for your concern but I have weighed my options and this is what my doctor and I feel is best for me. And that's that. Everyone will always have there opinions. But who cares. Just as long as you feel what your doing is right, nothing else matters. Another thing I have learned is never to try to explain myself to people like that. It's not worth the breath. Keep your chin up and you have all of the support u need over here!! I am so happy that you have chosen to make this decision to save your life! It's a huge sacrifice and takes alot!
 
Hiya i have been judged all my married life by my husbands family & decided not to tell them what i had not because im ashamed but because i thought it had sod all to do with em & everyone of them recently was shocked to see me @ a family funeral .... i just held my head up high & felt really proud of myself as you will so ignore their comments & concentrate on the rest of your life xx
 
Just keep going forward to meet your own goals, this too will pass. While you need the support of family, the true ones will shine when you need them the most.

You are brave wanting to change, how easy would it be to stay as you are and give up hope of being different?! Never give up, always question and expect more that's the kinda of people we are on this forum. So while this situation hurt, it's only temporary soon you will look back fitter and happier and smile!

Anna xx.

Sent from my iPhone using WLSurgery
 
I too have no real support. My daughter has told me outright that she does not support me, well sod them all, I've looked after everyone else all my life, and now at 50 I'm doing this for me, just me me me lol to hell with the lot of them hahaha
 
it never ceases to amaze me how people feel they have the right to judge others,we all have opinions and judge to a degree but to be so vocal about someones personal choices and decisions is just plan rude and i think the best thing to do is,,,,TELL EM TO JOG ON!,will they be wipin ya bum and cleaning ya bed sores if you get bedridden from obesity,or telling your son if god forbid you av a stroke,or worse?,,,,lifes for living love and this op hopefully will give you healthier happier years with the people that matter ,the family members that love and care for you and want the best for you ,,yes some are gonna think its a bad choice , my daughter did,she was scared ,im her mum ,its natural ,but the more we talked and the more she researched it ,she now understands the reasons im doing this ,if your family cant understand that you need this medical help to lose some weight,cos when alls said and done ,the op is only a tool to help us , and support you, then maybe those people aint worthy of being called family and friends,as for losing it yourself,do they think we have not tried?, do these people realize how long it would take to safetly lose 12st plus?,,most of us are not talking about a couple of stone ,,,anyway rant over haha, you stay strong ,listen to your own heart and head,this is the start of a new life ,i for one wish you the best of luck and look forward to see you show everyone it was the best choice you ever made x,
 
they have never been in the situation where u feel u have to do this, my mother knows im having it done, but they still say i should just eat healthy n exercise i mean, yea easy for u to say, i even said to her how hard it is for me to bath n washing over n her come back was well ur not helping urself!!! nice i think i was jus telling her how it is n i get a sarchy comment back.
WHO CARES WHAT ANYONE ELSE THINKS!!! WE ARE DOING THIS CAUSE WE HAVE TO!!! IF THEY DONT LIKE IT DONT LOOK AT IT!!!

that my opinion lol so if i was harsh xxxxx
 
starr said:
it never ceases to amaze me how people feel they have the right to judge others,we all have opinions and judge to a degree but to be so vocal about someones personal choices and decisions is just plan rude and i think the best thing to do is,,,,TELL EM TO JOG ON!,will they be wipin ya bum and cleaning ya bed sores if you get bedridden from obesity,or telling your son if god forbid you av a stroke,or worse?,,,,lifes for living love and this op hopefully will give you healthier happier years with the people that matter ,the family members that love and care for you and want the best for you ,,yes some are gonna think its a bad choice , my daughter did,she was scared ,im her mum ,its natural ,but the more we talked and the more she researched it ,she now understands the reasons im doing this ,if your family cant understand that you need this medical help to lose some weight,cos when alls said and done ,the op is only a tool to help us , and support you, then maybe those people aint worthy of being called family and friends,as for losing it yourself,do they think we have not tried?, do these people realize how long it would take to safetly lose 12st plus?,,most of us are not talking about a couple of stone ,,,anyway rant over haha, you stay strong ,listen to your own heart and head,this is the start of a new life ,i for one wish you the best of luck and look forward to see you show everyone it was the best choice you ever made x,
Click to expand...

I totally agree with Dawn, for people who have only a couple of stone to loose will never know or understand what we are all going through, and I wish you well on your journey, be strong x
 
well i have just fired off a few txts to the socalled family giving my opinions on there lifes and there short comings feeling a bit better now also the one who was give the most on the subject i found out that she had a boob job on the nhs 4 years ago so ive given her my opinion that a boob job is not the best thing to have on the nhs when there are people who need a life saving ops other than having smaller boobs so she can not have a bad back
 
Are u feeling ok about that. Or having some regrets?
 
Hi, I am so sorry you have been made to feel this way ... families are always very unpredictable & I can understand why you feel so hurt even if you are not close to them. Really not sure why people feel they have any right to comment on other peoples lives but they do. As long as you have your wife's support, sod :eek: the rest. You only have one life & need to live it as well & as healthily as you can ... you owe this to your son. As for the rest, let them get on with their own lives & they will either come around or not & if not it is their loss. They may relent when they see the difference this life saving operation makes. Chin up chuck :) x
 
there not worth bothering about i am the black sheep not always done the right i have never done drugs i dont drink i stoped smoking @13 lol i done things my way .
you these arselick to my grandparents the one has txt me back saying that she and mu aunt know that im going prvt and that i have be given money by gran lol jokes on them told them that if i had gone prvt that i would of had my op months ago not waitin 11 months so the can take a long walk lol like i say i dont have a problem with my weight you do lol
 
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