PLEASE HELP - FEEL LIKE I'VE GIVEN UP BEFORE i STARTED!

[friendlygal2002]

Hope you all dont mind me having a rant and pouring out all my feelings on here but just dont know what else to do atm!I really want to tell everyone how im feeling but I know no one will understand except probably u lot. As some of you know, I have a consultation for a band on 22nd October. After being fat for what feels like ,all my life on diets, I felt I had made the right decision. However, I now seem to be questioning everything. I feel extremely anxious thinking I will be unable to eat meat ever again, pasta, rice etc. I seem to live on these foods and feel I will be very unhappy without them. Do you still crave these foods? I know this sounds stupid but I absolutely love diet pepsi and will not be able to have that either. I have been pretending that I have the band and trying to go without the pepsi but I have failed every day! Feel such a failure as after feeling that I'd found my answer to losing weight, I now dont think it is for me! I think what has made things worse for me is that I know someone who has just had a band fitted {hasn't had her frirst fill yet} is eating piles of food. I know she probably has no restriction but surely she should feel her stomach is a little smaller at this stage. Sorry to sound so negative, its just I have failed with everything else and really didn't want this to fail for me. I have gone from feeling elated and looking forward to my appointment to disillusioned and depressed. I could do with advice on this pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeee x Julie

 

[dawny]

hi,first of all welcome. im not a bander, im a by passer. but i do know you can still eat meat rice and pasta. look for neens posts, she has started some special posts just for banders. she will answer all your questions huni.
its a big step having wls, so your bound to be questioning things,but try not to worry too much, and have a word with neen, she will put your mind at rest.
good luck with your journey, and im sure youll be fine, once you know exactly what you need to know.big hugs xxx

 

[Rebirth]

Hi, Dawny has given you some good advice in looking for Neen's post. I too am a bypasser but do know that you will be able to eat all the things that you have mentioned. The only thing that really gives you any restriction when you first have the bypass is the fact your pouch will be swollen. That is why you do not have your first real fill until it has had time to heal. I chose the bypass because I knew that I needed the added incentive of dumping if I went over board on sweet/fatty things.

The BOSPA site is quite good to read as it gives you information about the various bariatric surgies and helps you decide which is the right one for your particular eating style. Even those of us who have had the bypass will be able to eat the things you have mentioned.

Don't panic, I'm sure Neen or another bander will be along soon.

Reasuring hugs coming your way.

Rebirth xx

 

[joylouise]

Hiya im due to have a bypass on friday and i feel the same regarding food, i love my food and im actually worried about not being able to eat certain things. I cant comment about the band but im sure that there are loads on here that can and will put your mind at ease.

Good luck with your journey honey x

 

[dawny]

good luck for friday joylouise, hope everything goes ok for you, which im sure it will. just remember to get your rest, and keep sipping away, dont worry about losing weight for the first few weeks, the important thing is to recover.
let us know how you go on, and we'll all budge up on the losers bench to make room for you.
big hugs xxxx

 

[sugga]

Hello lovey, oh its so hard isnt it? Sorry to here you worrying so much about wls. Can i just say that i know a couple of people, one who had the band, and one who had the bypass. They both had to follow there instructions for each op, but now they both eat the foods they like best, but keep away from the foods that dont agree with them or make them dump. There portions are small and they chew and chew and chew, and sip sip sip.

This is a learning process for us all who have chosen wls lovey and like life itself we will make mistakes and learn from them. Everyone is different and what one person can eat another may not.

Hope you dont mind me asking but are you under nhs because if so they will recommend what op is right for you. Different wls will work better for each individual depending on your eating habits. When i went to see my consultant he advised the bypass because of how my eating habits were.

Im due a bypass in December and i just want you to know that you are not on your own in this, its been an horrendous time for me too. You will worry, you will learn, but remember you will also succeed.

As Dawny said look out for Neen she had a band and is brilliant on advice, bet she will along pretty soon with her great knowledge and support for you. Sending calming thoughts your way. xxxx Andrea (sugga)

 

[Bev]

Hi Julie,

I am due to have my pre op on 20th October.

Don't feel alone with the way you are feeling and I question everything too... it's good that we do... plus you will find someone on here who has the answer to your questions...

I think it's a lot to do with the mind and the thought of us not being able to lean on food as we have always done... but we will still be having things we like later on, but just less of it.

I personally think it's worth the commitment, I can lose weight, but can't keep it off... so I need help because my health is suffering and I'm older now, I wish I could have done it in my thirties instead of waiting for another 20 years...

It would be a great help if you fill in your weight and details so we can hold your hand.

I've even gone so far as to publish my measurements because I need to be totally honest with myself about me.

Always feel free to send us a personal message and to ask for support...

I totally agree, there is a lot to learn from Neen with the gastic band, she has really been able to work with it and has loads of knowledge.

Sending a loving hug and every good wish to you for your weightloss journey, always at your side.

Bev xxx

 

[Stellap]

Hiya im due to have a bypass on friday and i feel the same regarding food, i love my food and im actually worried about not being able to eat certain things. I cant comment about the band but im sure that there are loads on here that can and will put your mind at ease.

Good luck with your journey honey x

Hi, I just wanted to say that it totally depends on the individual regarding what you can eat and what you can't eat, some dump on sweet things some dont, some cannot manage bread, others have no problems with it. I had my bypass 10 months ago and can eat anything just smaller amounts of it. Sometimes I dump on sweet things, other times I don't - it's all trial and error and even the surgeons cannot predict what you will/will not be able to manage. Also some foods you cannot tolerate will be come tolerable further down the line.

 

[friendlygal2002]

thank you all for your kind words. its so nice to talk to people who understand. good luck to all of you. things are a little clearer for me today. just really disappointed in myself that i have to have wls x ps i am privately funding the surgery. regards julie

 

[Neen]

Hi Julie x I have been mad busy today with family over for Sunday lunch but I just noticed this thread x If you want I can try and answer any queries for you I can tomorrow xxxx

 

[jayney3252]

Hi Julie, I have had a band now since November but properly from July (had problems with the fitting but it is just tome wont happen to you) so want to put your mind at rest, I eat pasta, bread and rice and meat every day nearly and you can eat them it may not be easy at the start obviously you go through your food textures first after the op but there is nothing you can never eat again the difference is that you wont be able to eat as much as you did. I am fine so long as someone doesnt say you can never have again!! As with coke you are or should be when you have the band scared to drink it as it will gas up up etc but if you really can not live without it then have ice cubes in it as this will make it go flat as its only the bubbles that are the problem and I dont know if your the same but i dont like it flat so it may put you off it all together or it will just satisfy your craving. You wont be able to eat loads straight after the op as your tummy is swollen inside from surgery so feels like restriction but yes that does calm down and you can eat more but it is will power to be careful and in my case i was scared to eat too much incase I was sick. The beauty is you feel full and not hungry (well I did) the only thing I have to stress is the bite sizes, I was doing it wrong and making myself sick all the time and putting on weight arghhh so now i take 5p piece size nibbles of my food and chew it madly until a mush as my dietician told me the opening to the band is about 2mm which is a small finger nails so if you take a normal size bite of something and chew it to death then swallow all that it is just too much to go through and then you can be sick so practice makes perfect I have had some problems with it but I still say it is the best thing I have ever done and even though I wasnt supported by the band till July I am now and have 8 mils in a 10 mils band and have lost 4 stone so it does woek but you do have to work with it as you can cheat but seeing the weight coming off makes it feel so good that you dont want to cheat as your just cheating yourself. Good luck and I hope you get your mind put straight

 

[jo86]

Hope you all dont mind me having a rant and pouring out all my feelings on here but just dont know what else to do atm!I really want to tell everyone how im feeling but I know no one will understand except probably u lot. As some of you know, I have a consultation for a band on 22nd October. After being fat for what feels like ,all my life on diets, I felt I had made the right decision. However, I now seem to be questioning everything. I feel extremely anxious thinking I will be unable to eat meat ever again, pasta, rice etc. I seem to live on these foods and feel I will be very unhappy without them. Do you still crave these foods? I know this sounds stupid but I absolutely love diet pepsi and will not be able to have that either. I have been pretending that I have the band and trying to go without the pepsi but I have failed every day! Feel such a failure as after feeling that I'd found my answer to losing weight, I now dont think it is for me! I think what has made things worse for me is that I know someone who has just had a band fitted {hasn't had her frirst fill yet} is eating piles of food. I know she probably has no restriction but surely she should feel her stomach is a little smaller at this stage. Sorry to sound so negative, its just I have failed with everything else and really didn't want this to fail for me. I have gone from feeling elated and looking forward to my appointment to disillusioned and depressed. I could do with advice on this pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeee x Julie

Are we related?!?! i too have a unhealthy obsession with diet pepsi!! lol lovely ain't it I have too tried to cut back but failing i am however not drinking with meals and not drinking untill a hour before and after meals as i was told i would need to learn this!! I wanted to have a band fitted but the dietician and bariatric nurse said things pass thru easier with the band and it is advised i have a bypass, less likely to cheat! So after consideration decided on bypass. I would imagine going by what some people have said your taste for food changes after a while anyways. We have the tool to aide us in losing weight we just need to make some sacrifices and efforts for it to work.

You'll be fine hunny xx

 

[friendlygal2002]

Thanx Janey that really helps and congrats on your weight loss so far, keep up the good work. Its great to know its working for you. Julie xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[friendlygal2002]

Are we related?!?! i too have a unhealthy obsession with diet pepsi!! lol lovely ain't it I have too tried to cut back but failing i am however not drinking with meals and not drinking untill a hour before and after meals as i was told i would need to learn this!! I wanted to have a band fitted but the dietician and bariatric nurse said things pass thru easier with the band and it is advised i have a bypass, less likely to cheat! So after consideration decided on bypass. I would imagine going by what some people have said your taste for food changes after a while anyways. We have the tool to aide us in losing weight we just need to make some sacrifices and efforts for it to work.

You'll be fine hunny xx

Thanx jo. Im not to bothered about cutting down on portion sizes, its just the fact that I didn't think I'd be able to have any of them. I know thats not the case now but feel like I will seriously struggle with the pepsi!!!!! Julie x