Sam's Musings

[SAM55]

Hey hunny just read through part of your diary you have done so well hunny. I have got some ideas if what to eat post op ( miles away for me) take care hunny. Xxx

Thanks Lottie. x

 

[SAM55]

ok, ate a whole bag of chocolate buttons today, but at least it was before I had picked at everything else. Will be glad when my kitchen has been done and i can go back to ordering my groceries online en mass, so I don't have to go into the supermarket and be tempted just because I have run out of milk.

Feeling tired, in pain and fed up today. Weather has been lousy for two days and I am fed up with sorting boxes and shredding paper. Will also be glad when the GE has happened and there may be more interesting things on the TV when you are fed up with the real world!

 

[FeeBee]

as always x

 

[Lottiewishes]

Hey hunny...read through the rest of your journal.

The weather here is pants too. It's doesn't help my mood either ; ( tomorrow sup posed to be better here

I have 3 big bags of shredding to go home to when I get out of this mental health unit-it's been building up since match. Sigh.

Xxxx

 

[SAM55]

Got my ESA assessment date today - 27th June. My advocate is on annual leave - bloody typical. She also didn't take a copy of the form she helped me complete as her printer was broken. This country is in a mess.

 

[SAM55]

Hey hunny...read through the rest of your journal.

The weather here is pants too. It's doesn't help my mood either ; ( tomorrow sup posed to be better here

I have 3 big bags of shredding to go home to when I get out of this mental health unit-it's been building up since match. Sigh.

Xxxx

Hope you got some better weather today - I did. Not sure it has helped my mood though given my recent post. Hope you are well enough to go home soon, if that is what you want - even if it is to some shredding. I have one more bag left to do before tomorrow... sigh...

 

[Lottiewishes]

Oh no hunny hugs. I am on ESA and know the hoops you have to jump through to get it. I am dreading the transfer of dla to pip in sep.

Oh no sorry that they didn't take a copy of the form

Is that for a face to face interview hunny? Xxxc

 

[SAM55]

Oh no hunny hugs. I am on ESA and know the hoops you have to jump through to get it. I am dreading the transfer of dla to pip in sep.

Oh no sorry that they didn't take a copy of the form

Is that for a face to face interview hunny? Xxxc

It is. It will be my third in 8 years and they never go well and I have to appeal/go to tribunal. Also expecting a DLA to PIP at some point this year.

 

[Lottiewishes]

I always have to get someone to help me fill in the form. Sometimes it's my cpn or one of my carers. I suffer with serve mh problems and also ME. I don't know of its any help and as you have done it 3 times in 8 years you probably know what to do and know more than me. And understand we have only just "met" on here But would be happy to help you fill in any forms via email. I don't know what I would do if my carers didnt help me. Just seeing a brown envelope makes my heart rate go up and stresses me out more. But please if I can do anything to help I will. There's an dla/esa facebook group-sorry not sure if you are on fb? But they help people out on there. Sorry if you know all this. Just know how stressful this all is.

Big hugs my lovely. Xxxx

 

[SAM55]

I always have to get someone to help me fill in the form. Sometimes it's my cpn or one of my carers. I suffer with serve mh problems and also ME. I don't know of its any help and as you have done it 3 times in 8 years you probably know what to do and know more than me. And understand we have only just "met" on here But would be happy to help you fill in any forms via email. I don't know what I would do if my carers didnt help me. Just seeing a brown envelope makes my heart rate go up and stresses me out more. But please if I can do anything to help I will. There's an dla/esa facebook group-sorry not sure if you are on fb? But they help people out on there. Sorry if you know all this. Just know how stressful this all is.

Big hugs my lovely. Xxxx

Thank you Lottie. That is a very generous offer. The forms are all done for now. I am a master at form filling until it comes to these as I struggle on my own to think about how bad it can be. Also have bad MH and only mild ME now, although it used to be a lot worse. It was certainly better for the 4 years that they had left me alone as I wasn't fretting about losing my flat - been there and done that in the past. I didn't know about the Facebook Group although I am on there so will go and have a look. Thanks for that useful piece of info.

I now have someone meeting me at the centre for some moral support and who I can talk to afterwards about how it went, although we haven't met before. Means I have to do the journey on my own which will probably be no bad thing as my stress levels will be so high it will certainly be a bad day anxiety wise!

I have also put in a request for the session to be recorded so I get a copy at the end.

 

[FeeBee]

I'm glad you at least have someone for moral support. I know how tough it is and wish I had more to offer than hugs x

 

[SAM55]

serious binge today. 4 hot cross buns, a bag of Twirl bites and an iced latte in the space of a couple of hours - not sure how there was room! Feeling very out of control and don't seem able to lift my mood no matter what I try. Feel totally at the mercy of the 'systems' at present. Got another 'choose and book' letter this morning with no choice and no book. Went for an indian head massage this morning hoping that would help but ended up with more neck and shoulder pain than I started with

It's my birthday on Sunday and going out tomorrow to an RSPB nature reserve to hopefully see puffins (and the sea), so hoping that will help. Curry on Sunday evening with friends so another hurdle to cross but better than sitting indoors surrounded by boxes.

 

[Lottiewishes]

Oh hugs hunny. Glad theres going to be someone there who you can talk to and hsving it recorded is a great idea hunny. I never trust them after we ended up owe £6000 back on tax credits.

Your birthday sounds like you have got a lovely day planned hunny. I hope you have a super time hun.

Hugs xxxx

 

[SAM55]

half a pound gain. Obviously not the direction I want to be going given it was another pound last week on top of a stall the week before, but considering this past week, a lot less than I was dreading!

 

[Lottiewishes]

Aw hunny you have had a tough week YOU will soon have that off again sweetheart xxx

 

[Want2b3]

Hey @SAM55 Happy birthday
Hope you have a great day and don't worry about food today as today is your treat day!
I put on 2 lbs this week re 3/4 day binge over stress. It is finding now other coping strategies without calories that is hardest! I am going to by ice lolly kits and make nas icelollies to see if that helps. You have got a lot of stress with kitchen pains and waiting for dread ESA, be kind to yourself and put that emotional self blaming stick away. I think you are doing fab considering all this it will pass but today don't worry about food it's a day you can leagally have off

 

[Lottiewishes]

Happy Birthday Hunny xxx

 

[SAM55]

Ok, have hit the Baileys (the not real Baileys) this evening after a an exceedingly stressful day. Very difficult meeting and half a kitchen done. It is starting to look good. Will be interesting to see what effect my first alcohol (other than a mouthful on Christmas Eve) has on me at 8 months out!

Psychologist is back from 2 weeks holiday tomorrow so hopefully she can help!!

 

[Lottiewishes]

Sorry your mon was stressful hunny.

Take care of yourself xxc

 

[FeeBee]

I'm sorry I missed your birthday but belated best wishes!!
I hope you are feeling a bit better this week? x