-
Hi, If you cannot get into the site, be sure to Contact Us. Please be advised that the app is no longer in use!
So....This IS IT!!
- Thread starter Ana_RW
- Start date
Ana_RW
New Member
So high then....crash!
Today so far has been getting the better of me. I've been tearful snappy and tired.
I am genuinely tired - lots of late nights and early mornings - unavoidable but necessary. The lack of calorie intake probably has a hand in it too.
My mum has been getting a little bit on my nerves.
We never have had the best relationship, spurts of being close but never 100% solid. We're just totally different. We had a few hard years when she first met her new partner but that seems to have settled ok now. I guess she's being as supportive as she can be at this time. All I keep getting from her is "if you don't want to go through with it don't" and I have to explain that I do, I really really do. She's always been big as have her immediate family - weight for all of us has been a life long struggle - just so happens mine is too much for me and I don't want all the health problems associated with weight so hence my decision for my op and truly I really cant wait until Monday!
I don't know if jealousy is the right word but, she's always got to be one better than me. I'll say I lost 3lb and she'll say she's lost 5. I keep getting calls asking how I'm doing on the pre op diet but its like she's more interested in telling me what she's eaten today. She'll tell me it's so hard doing Slimming World green days - well the other day I snapped and said you wanna bloody try a milk diet! That's HARD! She just said "I know I know I just keep thinking if you can do it I can". :sigh:
The kids are staying at hers Sunday night so hubby can come up to hospital with me and she has said she'll be there for them as much as we need - which I greatly appreciate - she wont ever let me forget it though. It's her partners birthday on Thursday so Sunday she wants us to go to a BBQ!! Seriously! A BBQ?!
Anyway I agreed just told her don't expect me to cook anything lol. Today she rings me to tell me that he has invited his family down for it too, I've never met them before and how awkward is it gonna be for me! I explained to her that I am worrying a bit because I'm going to be sitting with my milk while everyone fills up on burgers and sausages etc and I'm gonna feel like an idiot! I don't want to tell people I've not met that I'm on a pre-op diet because I don't feel I should or even want to.
All I got from mum was don't worry " I wont be eating alot just salad really" yeah right!!- but that's still eating and you know them and they know you diet! I also explained that I wont be staying late because I've got to get up at 5:30am to get ready and then explained I'm worried about the kids staying up to late and they have school. She just told me not to worry and she'll sort it and it wont be late and it'll be ok. Then she asked me if i was ok and that I sounded upset - well that was it out they came the tears! I sobbed but I'm not sure why - I said I was worried about everything not the op but I just feel I've got so much to prepare and so little time - hubby is a fantastic dad but, I just worry will the kids be fed ok, get to school on time, be washed and clean etc etc I blamed my emotional outburst on hubby getting drunk last night but that wasn't true! Well not entirely. I text mum after and said it's not hubby's fault, I'm just tired, cranky and I'm hormonal **Apologies to the men here
** I'm about to have my period and I'm worrying incase this affects surgery. I've emailed Diane at the hospital twice now but she hasn't replied, boy will i be gutted if they can do it because of 
women's problems
I just feel a bit overwhelmed today. Better since I had a little cry but still not myself.
On a positive note - not feeling hungry still going strong on the milk, bought healthy foods for the family to cover from now until I'm home from hospital where I will probably do an online shop. Not one of hubby's best traits lol :giggle:
Best wishes & love to all
Today so far has been getting the better of me. I've been tearful snappy and tired.
I am genuinely tired - lots of late nights and early mornings - unavoidable but necessary. The lack of calorie intake probably has a hand in it too.
My mum has been getting a little bit on my nerves.
We never have had the best relationship, spurts of being close but never 100% solid. We're just totally different. We had a few hard years when she first met her new partner but that seems to have settled ok now. I guess she's being as supportive as she can be at this time. All I keep getting from her is "if you don't want to go through with it don't" and I have to explain that I do, I really really do. She's always been big as have her immediate family - weight for all of us has been a life long struggle - just so happens mine is too much for me and I don't want all the health problems associated with weight so hence my decision for my op and truly I really cant wait until Monday!
I don't know if jealousy is the right word but, she's always got to be one better than me. I'll say I lost 3lb and she'll say she's lost 5. I keep getting calls asking how I'm doing on the pre op diet but its like she's more interested in telling me what she's eaten today. She'll tell me it's so hard doing Slimming World green days - well the other day I snapped and said you wanna bloody try a milk diet! That's HARD! She just said "I know I know I just keep thinking if you can do it I can". :sigh:
The kids are staying at hers Sunday night so hubby can come up to hospital with me and she has said she'll be there for them as much as we need - which I greatly appreciate - she wont ever let me forget it though. It's her partners birthday on Thursday so Sunday she wants us to go to a BBQ!! Seriously! A BBQ?!
Anyway I agreed just told her don't expect me to cook anything lol. Today she rings me to tell me that he has invited his family down for it too, I've never met them before and how awkward is it gonna be for me! I explained to her that I am worrying a bit because I'm going to be sitting with my milk while everyone fills up on burgers and sausages etc and I'm gonna feel like an idiot! I don't want to tell people I've not met that I'm on a pre-op diet because I don't feel I should or even want to.
All I got from mum was don't worry " I wont be eating alot just salad really" yeah right!!- but that's still eating and you know them and they know you diet! I also explained that I wont be staying late because I've got to get up at 5:30am to get ready and then explained I'm worried about the kids staying up to late and they have school. She just told me not to worry and she'll sort it and it wont be late and it'll be ok. Then she asked me if i was ok and that I sounded upset - well that was it out they came the tears! I sobbed but I'm not sure why - I said I was worried about everything not the op but I just feel I've got so much to prepare and so little time - hubby is a fantastic dad but, I just worry will the kids be fed ok, get to school on time, be washed and clean etc etc I blamed my emotional outburst on hubby getting drunk last night but that wasn't true! Well not entirely. I text mum after and said it's not hubby's fault, I'm just tired, cranky and I'm hormonal **Apologies to the men here
** I'm about to have my period and I'm worrying incase this affects surgery. I've emailed Diane at the hospital twice now but she hasn't replied, boy will i be gutted if they can do it because of women's problemsI just feel a bit overwhelmed today. Better since I had a little cry but still not myself.
On a positive note - not feeling hungry still going strong on the milk, bought healthy foods for the family to cover from now until I'm home from hospital where I will probably do an online shop. Not one of hubby's best traits lol :giggle:
Best wishes & love to all
wendy1963
Member
I think we all have had day's like this leding up to surgery just think this time next year you will be well on your way to being a healthy weight and although it's difficult now meeting the new people just think of all the praise you will be getting next year when you see them. All the best WendyToday so far has been getting the better of me. I've been tearful snappy and tired.
I am genuinely tired - lots of late nights and early mornings - unavoidable but necessary. The lack of calorie intake probably has a hand in it too.
My mum has been getting a little bit on my nerves.
We never have had the best relationship, spurts of being close but never 100% solid. We're just totally different. We had a few hard years when she first met her new partner but that seems to have settled ok now. I guess she's being as supportive as she can be at this time. All I keep getting from her is "if you don't want to go through with it don't" and I have to explain that I do, I really really do. She's always been big as have her immediate family - weight for all of us has been a life long struggle - just so happens mine is too much for me and I don't want all the health problems associated with weight so hence my decision for my op and truly I really cant wait until Monday!
I don't know if jealousy is the right word but, she's always got to be one better than me. I'll say I lost 3lb and she'll say she's lost 5. I keep getting calls asking how I'm doing on the pre op diet but its like she's more interested in telling me what she's eaten today. She'll tell me it's so hard doing Slimming World green days - well the other day I snapped and said you wanna bloody try a milk diet! That's HARD! She just said "I know I know I just keep thinking if you can do it I can". :sigh:
The kids are staying at hers Sunday night so hubby can come up to hospital with me and she has said she'll be there for them as much as we need - which I greatly appreciate - she wont ever let me forget it though. It's her partners birthday on Thursday so Sunday she wants us to go to a BBQ!! Seriously! A BBQ?!
Anyway I agreed just told her don't expect me to cook anything lol. Today she rings me to tell me that he has invited his family down for it too, I've never met them before and how awkward is it gonna be for me! I explained to her that I am worrying a bit because I'm going to be sitting with my milk while everyone fills up on burgers and sausages etc and I'm gonna feel like an idiot! I don't want to tell people I've not met that I'm on a pre-op diet because I don't feel I should or even want to.
All I got from mum was don't worry " I wont be eating alot just salad really" yeah right!!- but that's still eating and you know them and they know you diet! I also explained that I wont be staying late because I've got to get up at 5:30am to get ready and then explained I'm worried about the kids staying up to late and they have school. She just told me not to worry and she'll sort it and it wont be late and it'll be ok. Then she asked me if i was ok and that I sounded upset - well that was it out they came the tears! I sobbed but I'm not sure why - I said I was worried about everything not the op but I just feel I've got so much to prepare and so little time - hubby is a fantastic dad but, I just worry will the kids be fed ok, get to school on time, be washed and clean etc etc I blamed my emotional outburst on hubby getting drunk last night but that wasn't true! Well not entirely. I text mum after and said it's not hubby's fault, I'm just tired, cranky and I'm hormonal **Apologies to the men here
I just feel a bit overwhelmed today. Better since I had a little cry but still not myself.
On a positive note - not feeling hungry still going strong on the milk, bought healthy foods for the family to cover from now until I'm home from hospital where I will probably do an online shop. Not one of hubby's best traits lol :giggle:
Best wishes & love to all
Fading Grace
Fading Away
Oh you poor lass *Hugs* Hmm, where to start.
Well first of all, being this emotional is totally normal I was an Opzilla© (Hehe) before my surgery, everyone around me was walking on egg shells as they didn't know what mood I was in. Some of our emotions are nerves, fear, excitement, worry etc.. It doesn't help that you're on your period but don't worry your op won't be cancelled because of that because I was on mine the date of my op
As for the relationship with your mum, well sadly some people indirectly, or directly do try and sabotage things for us. Sometimes it's jealously, or sometimes it's just their fear of being left behind if you better yourself somehow
It's time for you to put your positive head on now, regardless of what happens in the next few days, stay positive, think ahead to your end goal.
Think about it, most of us here have eaten our whole lives, a few of us (me included) moaned about the milk diet because it is very hard but when you think we've over eaten our whole lives , that diet is just a means to an ends. (To be honest when I was on my milk diet it put things into perspective for me, it made me have more empathy for the starving people of the world and unlike them, at some point I will be able to eat a range of foods again. Depressing I know but we have to face reality square in the face sometimes)
Good luck for Monday, I hope that everything goes well for you and that you will get all of the support that you need. When you look back to your thread this time next year when you're a few dress sizes smaller than you are now... how you will smile and see that everything bit of pain you went through was worth it!
Well first of all, being this emotional is totally normal I was an Opzilla© (Hehe) before my surgery, everyone around me was walking on egg shells as they didn't know what mood I was in. Some of our emotions are nerves, fear, excitement, worry etc.. It doesn't help that you're on your period but don't worry your op won't be cancelled because of that because I was on mine the date of my op
As for the relationship with your mum, well sadly some people indirectly, or directly do try and sabotage things for us. Sometimes it's jealously, or sometimes it's just their fear of being left behind if you better yourself somehow
It's time for you to put your positive head on now, regardless of what happens in the next few days, stay positive, think ahead to your end goal.
Think about it, most of us here have eaten our whole lives, a few of us (me included) moaned about the milk diet because it is very hard but when you think we've over eaten our whole lives , that diet is just a means to an ends. (To be honest when I was on my milk diet it put things into perspective for me, it made me have more empathy for the starving people of the world and unlike them, at some point I will be able to eat a range of foods again. Depressing I know but we have to face reality square in the face sometimes)
Good luck for Monday, I hope that everything goes well for you and that you will get all of the support that you need. When you look back to your thread this time next year when you're a few dress sizes smaller than you are now... how you will smile and see that everything bit of pain you went through was worth it!
Jamast
Member
Big Hugs - I have days like that and I'm quite a way away from surgery yet lol.
As for your mum and the BBQ, couldn't you be a bit naughty and let the milk diet give you a bad case of the runs on the actual morning of the BBQ? - of course you'd have to be concerned in case it isn't the milk diet and could be a bug of some sort - you couldn't possibly risk passing it on, especially to her partner on his birthday lol.
As for your mum and the BBQ, couldn't you be a bit naughty and let the milk diet give you a bad case of the runs on the actual morning of the BBQ? - of course you'd have to be concerned in case it isn't the milk diet and could be a bug of some sort - you couldn't possibly risk passing it on, especially to her partner on his birthday lol.
Ana_RW
New Member
Ah thanks so much everyone! See now this is what i love about this site. Everyone knows exactly where I'm coming from and says the nicest and best things it always makes me feel so much better! Thankyou!
Wendy: I cannot wait! I hope to be able to have the confidence to have our first family holida abroad lol x
Grace: I can relate to all of what you've said! And the direct or indirect sabotage makes a lot of sense to me! Thankyou for telling me you were on for your surgery too! Lol this has made me more relieved! Thanks for your kind words x
Jasmat: Thankyou! As for using that naughty excuse that is a very good idea! I could use just to show my face briefly and then make my exit...arrive late leave early beause of it lol
Hugs all round! :grouphugg:
Wendy: I cannot wait! I hope to be able to have the confidence to have our first family holida abroad lol x
Grace: I can relate to all of what you've said! And the direct or indirect sabotage makes a lot of sense to me! Thankyou for telling me you were on for your surgery too! Lol this has made me more relieved! Thanks for your kind words x
Jasmat: Thankyou! As for using that naughty excuse that is a very good idea! I could use just to show my face briefly and then make my exit...arrive late leave early beause of it lol
Hugs all round!
:grouphugg:
Bellydancer57
New Member
You'd certainly get your protein quota. LOL
Bellydancer57
New Member
Endorse everything everyone has said on here. You won't regret it. I've just been to the Homerton for my broken fingers not a bariatric appointment but just re-enforce how great everyone is down there. Celebrated my scales creeping below the 16 mark into the 15s this morning by going to Bluewater & buying some smaller sexy bras - it will be you soon.
Good luck for Monday.
Good luck for Monday.
Evenstarr
New Member
Lots and lots of luck for Monday, when you've lost some weight and have some self confidence back it just might make all the difference in your relationship with your mum.
Mine started out as very supportive but lately seems to be taking the view that I'm taking the easy option by having bariatric surgery
I think mothers being annoying are a cross we all have to bear!
Again all the best for monday
Em xxxxxx
Mine started out as very supportive but lately seems to be taking the view that I'm taking the easy option by having bariatric surgery
I think mothers being annoying are a cross we all have to bear!
Again all the best for monday
Em xxxxxx
Ana_RW
New Member
Thanks ladies!
I hope your not in too much agnoy bellydancer? But yes they are a great team how was the parking there today lol?
Congrats on hitting your 15s so pleased for you! and too right if thats not an excuse to treat yourself what is lol x
Em what is it about mothers and knowing what buttons to push?! In some of the most hurtful ways! Still like you say it's a cross we have to bear. If only they knew this so isn't the easy quick fix cowardly way to go like so many think is! I admit I thought it was a quick fix cure but it's taken me my journey up to know to know its not, it's a tool and to realise how to get it to do the best job I can make it do! How far along are you now? x
I hope your not in too much agnoy bellydancer? But yes they are a great team
how was the parking there today lol?Congrats on hitting your 15s so pleased for you! and too right if thats not an excuse to treat yourself what is lol x
Em what is it about mothers and knowing what buttons to push?! In some of the most hurtful ways! Still like you say it's a cross we have to bear. If only they knew this so isn't the easy quick fix cowardly way to go like so many think is! I admit I thought it was a quick fix cure but it's taken me my journey up to know to know its not, it's a tool and to realise how to get it to do the best job I can make it do! How far along are you now? x
Bellydancer57
New Member
Parking fine but went early. I make googoo eyes at the security guard & he often helps me LOL
Yes mums what are they like. Mine lives with me & is disabled. She can try the patience of a saint sometimes. But I say she's only paying me back for when I was a troublesome 15 year old!
Yes mums what are they like. Mine lives with me & is disabled. She can try the patience of a saint sometimes. But I say she's only paying me back for when I was a troublesome 15 year old!
Muttley1900
Member
An, I see what you mean now in the other thread...
This is about you and unfortunitly, when some people try to give support, they make it about them. 'oh your leg hurts, let me tell you how my leg was nearly mauled off by a rabid hamster in 1966 when hospitals weren't so good then...'
Also, now this can be complete phsco babble rubbish*, but, it sounds as of your mum try's to use you as her motivation. Hence when you say you've lost 3lbs she says she's lost 5lbs. Almost wanting your approval. Mmm, and is she thinking about having WLS? With the comment re the milk diet 'if you can do it, I can' this makes me wonder...
I'd go to the BBQ, dressesed in a tutu (and no not because I wear that sort of thing at weekends), singing at the top of my voice interspersed with some major Tourette's like symptoms. Let them think that you can get mad cow disease from milk. But, I think you probably know a better way to handle it than I ::smiles at you::
*the original word started with b and rymed with Pollocks - but the auto filter didn't like it.
This is about you and unfortunitly, when some people try to give support, they make it about them. 'oh your leg hurts, let me tell you how my leg was nearly mauled off by a rabid hamster in 1966 when hospitals weren't so good then...'
Also, now this can be complete phsco babble rubbish*, but, it sounds as of your mum try's to use you as her motivation. Hence when you say you've lost 3lbs she says she's lost 5lbs. Almost wanting your approval. Mmm, and is she thinking about having WLS? With the comment re the milk diet 'if you can do it, I can' this makes me wonder...
I'd go to the BBQ, dressesed in a tutu (and no not because I wear that sort of thing at weekends), singing at the top of my voice interspersed with some major Tourette's like symptoms. Let them think that you can get mad cow disease from milk. But, I think you probably know a better way to handle it than I ::smiles at you::
*the original word started with b and rymed with Pollocks - but the auto filter didn't like it.
Last edited:
Ana_RW
New Member
Muttley!! Your post has had me in giggles! Thankyou for that alone
Mum hadn't originally ever considered wls - she's always done well with S/W and the fact her and her partner golf everyday - weather permitting. It just seems to be every so often she'll stall and put it all back on. I have said it's a way of life as in diet not just 1.diet 2.loose the weight 3.go back to normal eating pattern because then you'll be back to square -2 you put on all you lost and more. Up until I had educated her on wls that is. Since I've been on this leg of the journey the idea has been planted in her head, I've told her she 99% get funded because she has severe diabetes type 2 and I swear she has OSA. I originally thought I was diabetic because of the symptoms I had were similar to when she was first diagnosed with diabetes but my bloods were fine and when they did a sleep test it showed I have mild SA + borderline narcolepsy. I have tried to to tell her to get a sleep test but she's against it. With the idea of wls she says that her partner wouldn't like her to or be happy for her to, I'm not entirely sure why lol.
Anyway I'm over worried about it now lol but, thankyou you have made me smile this morning which was much needed! xx
Mum hadn't originally ever considered wls - she's always done well with S/W and the fact her and her partner golf everyday - weather permitting. It just seems to be every so often she'll stall and put it all back on. I have said it's a way of life as in diet not just 1.diet 2.loose the weight 3.go back to normal eating pattern because then you'll be back to square -2 you put on all you lost and more. Up until I had educated her on wls that is. Since I've been on this leg of the journey the idea has been planted in her head, I've told her she 99% get funded because she has severe diabetes type 2 and I swear she has OSA. I originally thought I was diabetic because of the symptoms I had were similar to when she was first diagnosed with diabetes but my bloods were fine and when they did a sleep test it showed I have mild SA + borderline narcolepsy. I have tried to to tell her to get a sleep test but she's against it. With the idea of wls she says that her partner wouldn't like her to or be happy for her to, I'm not entirely sure why lol.
Anyway I'm over worried about it now lol but, thankyou you have made me smile this morning which was much needed! xx
Muttley1900
Member
I like your thinking...
Muttley1900
Member
I think you are showing off now. BBQ in your honor on Sunday, go into hospital for the operation on Monday... What else would you like? A RAF flyover?
Seriously though, try and relax on Sunday and I wish you well for Monday.
Seriously though, try and relax on Sunday and I wish you well for Monday.
Ana_RW
New Member
First Flutter of Nerves
I've been online for too long this morning lol but never mind. I've just taken a glance at my countdown ticker and OMG! It says 3 days until WLS. THREE DAYS! Is that it?!! I've got my first flutter of nerves. I can feel it pounding in my chest. I'm excited for what is to come and cant wait to be on the losers bench but, at the same time I think, well of course I would be, terribly nervous. Such major surgery and I hate anything like doctors and hospitals, I get nervous seeing my GP for goodness sake lol. Still I'm sure all will be well, I hope anways.
I've been online for too long this morning lol but never mind. I've just taken a glance at my countdown ticker and OMG! It says 3 days until WLS. THREE DAYS! Is that it?!! I've got my first flutter of nerves. I can feel it pounding in my chest. I'm excited for what is to come and cant wait to be on the losers bench but, at the same time I think, well of course I would be, terribly nervous. Such major surgery and I hate anything like doctors and hospitals, I get nervous seeing my GP for goodness sake lol. Still I'm sure all will be well, I hope anways.
Similar threads
