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All booked and now on that road of no return

  • Morning Bling
  • Oh I will deff need an op .. I am walking just bone in bone now .. my op came about because the knee bone surgeon wouldn't give me a new knee because I was to heavy and my legs were to fat to heal well ..
  • Come spring I will get the ball rolling on the op ... ..
  • I promise you will get more relaxed about it all .. I remember during the first months of my journey I was a demon , reading and watching everything I could lay my eyes on .. then a calm tends to settle in along with your new life ..
  • Your doing so well , keep your eyes on the prize
  • Mindy
  • Xxxx
 
countrywench said:
Not weighed myself this week .. think I might take a leaf out of Cassie and Tracey's book and leave it for a few weeks ..
I'm honestly not to hung up on weighing myself every week and I don't want to get that way ..
the way forward for me now is to concentrate on healthier eating and to continue living my day without food being the centre of attention like it was before my band ..
I do have the Coffee shop habit though .. Monday , Tuesdays and Wednesday mornings finds me in my fav shop with a Peruvian latte and a lava hot bowl of blueberry porridge with mixed seeds ..,they make the porridge for me good and thick so you have slice the porridge with a spoon and chew it , just how I like it .. it then sits nicely in the tummy without slipping through the band .. so good ..
So that sets me up for the day and mid afternoon I will normally have avacado , ham and mini cheese with crackers ,.. then dinner and fruit and yogurt .

Why is it when I look in the mirror , even after losing a huge amount of weight , do I still think I'm huge ? What is that all about ! I'm now fitting in a size 18/20 and I know mentally I'm a whole lot smaller but I'm so hyper critical of myself in the mirror .. away from it I feel fantastic ! Very odd ..

On a good note I believe I am beginning to feel the benefits of weight loss on my knee .. finally !
I've knocked the Tramadol in the head unless it gets very painful while at work , but that's a rare thing now .. it's still very sore but it can be calmed down now by sitting for a few mins until it stops smarting .. so it's taken nearly 7st to get some sort of relief .. I find I can stand a whole lot longer than I could before . I don't have to worry to much while queuing in shops , when before I would not have bothered and left .. while cooking for the youngest the other day I realised I had stood up and the cooker and the worktop for a long time while cooking :) . I'm still taking my high based cocodamol but not as desperately as I was before .. long may this continue !
Suffering so much with the cold it's not funny .. my hands are icy most of the time and my ass is an ice cube ! Losing body fat does have its side affects after all.

Mindy
Xxxx
Click to expand...

It's so liberating being off the scales for a while.
Good about your knee pain easing, you deserve it after the hard work of wls!
Electric blankets are the best since sliced bread!
Well done you :)
 
countrywench said:
  • Morning Bling
  • Oh I will deff need an op .. I am walking just bone in bone now .. my op came about because the knee bone surgeon wouldn't give me a new knee because I was to heavy and my legs were to fat to heal well ..
  • Come spring I will get the ball rolling on the op ... ..
  • I promise you will get more relaxed about it all .. I remember during the first months of my journey I was a demon , reading and watching everything I could lay my eyes on .. then a calm tends to settle in along with your new life ..
  • Your doing so well , keep your eyes on the prize
  • Mindy
  • Xxxx
Click to expand...
Evening Mindy, Ouch that sound so painful and it's been a while now to, bless you but well done for taking the wls step to help yourself and you too have done incredibly well, your absolutely my inspiration, I keep trying to set some time aside to read yours and others diaries but it just doesn't seem to happen as I get way laid reading recent posts, maybe in the new year XxX
 
countrywench said:
Not weighed myself this week .. think I might take a leaf out of Cassie and Tracey's book and leave it for a few weeks ..
I'm honestly not to hung up on weighing myself every week and I don't want to get that way ..
the way forward for me now is to concentrate on healthier eating and to continue living my day without food being the centre of attention like it was before my band ..
I do have the Coffee shop habit though .. Monday , Tuesdays and Wednesday mornings finds me in my fav shop with a Peruvian latte and a lava hot bowl of blueberry porridge with mixed seeds ..,they make the porridge for me good and thick so you have slice the porridge with a spoon and chew it , just how I like it .. it then sits nicely in the tummy without slipping through the band .. so good ..
So that sets me up for the day and mid afternoon I will normally have avacado , ham and mini cheese with crackers ,.. then dinner and fruit and yogurt .

Why is it when I look in the mirror , even after losing a huge amount of weight , do I still think I'm huge ? What is that all about ! I'm now fitting in a size 18/20 and I know mentally I'm a whole lot smaller but I'm so hyper critical of myself in the mirror .. away from it I feel fantastic ! Very odd ..

On a good note I believe I am beginning to feel the benefits of weight loss on my knee .. finally !
I've knocked the Tramadol in the head unless it gets very painful while at work , but that's a rare thing now .. it's still very sore but it can be calmed down now by sitting for a few mins until it stops smarting .. so it's taken nearly 7st to get some sort of relief .. I find I can stand a whole lot longer than I could before . I don't have to worry to much while queuing in shops , when before I would not have bothered and left .. while cooking for the youngest the other day I realised I had stood up and the cooker and the worktop for a long time while cooking :) . I'm still taking my high based cocodamol but not as desperately as I was before .. long may this continue !
Suffering so much with the cold it's not funny .. my hands are icy most of the time and my ass is an ice cube ! Losing body fat does have its side affects after all.

Mindy
Xxxx
Click to expand...
Well done on knocking the Tramadol on the head, does your head feel better for it? I have never felt this cold before in my life! I have a theory on the mirror thing... For me I think it is because I am still the biggest person in my group of friends/colleagues, and when I am a smaller size than the biggest (wildly fantasising here) I will then not feel big. It may also happen when I get to a size 18 as that to me sounds like the top end of normal clothes shopping and not a plus size in most normal shops

What weight/BMI do you have to be to get your knees done? Mine is 15st/35
 
Morning Sam
No idea really on the bmi .. I've set myself a weight target of 17st before I go and see the doctor again to get my second referral, then by the time I wait for an appointment and then the waiting list , I should be down to about 16st or less ..

I stupidly agreed to use the buffer at work and get the huge shop floor scrubbed up and shinning .. I stopped using the buffer for over 2 years due to my knee whining at me when I did .. I'm the only one who can use it I must add .. the boss didn't want to pay out over £300 to get the floor done ..
So I dragged the machine out of hiding and set to .. my knee had been really good for the last week or so .. if you've never used a buffer before , it's like a slow dance .. you sway side to side and push your buffer partner in front of you and to the side .. it took me well over 2 hours to get the floor looking decent again. .. But the next morning my damn knee was bad again .. totally my own fault .. and it's been extremely sore for the last 3 days grrrrr .. but I'm determined not to game Tramadol again ..
off Xmas shopping in Salisbury today ! Yeahhhh ! Not been there for years so looking forward to it .. hoping to go have a peek at the cathedral also and some nice little quaint place for a spot of lunch :)
Have a wonderful day all !
Xxxxx
 
Sorry to hear about your knee.....but Salisbury......I live Salisbury and I swear the cathedral is the best in the country.
It's years since I've been but the memories are fresh x
 
Sorry about your knee, hope it get better before you resort to the dreaded T. Enjoy your shopping!
 
It's been a lovely day in Salisbury .. not to busy really and found a lovely little cafe which served as crummy English breakfast ! Gosh it was good and hot and had a nice thick slab of crispy black pudding :) ..
didn't spend much really but it was lovely to have a wander about even though I was so damn cold . I wore a new size 18 top out because I look very shapely in it but should have put a jumper on. Vanity does not keep us warm that's for sure. Hahahah !
Now I'm sat on my bed with the electric blanket keeping my butt baps warm !
Xxx
 
countrywench said:
Morning Sam
No idea really on the bmi .. I've set myself a weight target of 17st before I go and see the doctor again to get my second referral, then by the time I wait for an appointment and then the waiting list , I should be down to about 16st or less ..

I stupidly agreed to use the buffer at work and get the huge shop floor scrubbed up and shinning .. I stopped using the buffer for over 2 years due to my knee whining at me when I did .. I'm the only one who can use it I must add .. the boss didn't want to pay out over £300 to get the floor done ..
So I dragged the machine out of hiding and set to .. my knee had been really good for the last week or so .. if you've never used a buffer before , it's like a slow dance .. you sway side to side and push your buffer partner in front of you and to the side .. it took me well over 2 hours to get the floor looking decent again. .. But the next morning my damn knee was bad again .. totally my own fault .. and it's been extremely sore for the last 3 days grrrrr .. but I'm determined not to game Tramadol again ..
off Xmas shopping in Salisbury today ! Yeahhhh ! Not been there for years so looking forward to it .. hoping to go have a peek at the cathedral also and some nice little quaint place for a spot of lunch :)
Have a wonderful day all !
Xxxxx
Click to expand...
It might be worth checking what BMI is needed. My GP didn't know so he referred me long before I was anywhere near, they told me to come back in six months as I said I was waiting for WLS (wasn't even on waiting list at that point) which I did, and told me to come back when my BMI was 35 or lower. All for the same reasons as you. I had been referred to an out of area hospital by my GP as he knew they would do it at a higher BMI (turned out to be 38), but the BMI is decided by the CCG whose postcode you are in, not the hospital. Total waste of my time and theirs.

Very familiar with buffers from a past life as a housekeeper in a 90 bed conference centre (one of few satisfying cleaning jobs), which was the job/straw that broke the camels back with my knees. I don't even hoover now at home (unless it is Robbie) because of the arthritis in my back as well. Sounds like your boss needs to train someone else!

A friend of mine who has her own cleaning business has had knee problems which she didn't do anything about for 3 years. She recently had her knee scraped and it has made it worse, plus she is still cleaning, and has been told she probably now needs a full replacement. I keep telling her to find another job so she doesn't end up like me... :(
 
I'm so glad your knee is mostly feeling better, hopefully the encounter with the buffer won't leave it sore for too long.
I'm still trying to get my head around the whole wearing layers and being cold business. Plus if I sit in one position for too long my bum starts to get sore. It's weird the changes we probably never considered when we thought about how life would be before we had surgery :)

You look fantastic Mindy btw and I seem to remember from earlier posts that Mr Mindy agrees wholeheartedly ;)
 
Didn't expect to get in the scales but I popped into Boots and saw that it was was working for a change ! Another 2lb gone :) I now need just 2lb for my 7st :thankyouthankyou:..

This journey never ceases to amaze me .. Not that its easy , not by any means . It's been so liberating .. I finally feel that the siren called food is no longer calling me .. at this moment I'm sitting in Boswells , now you should see the Xmas food and pastries they have displayed , omg ! Seriously , a Tiramisu shortbread slice with thick chocolate on the top , another white choc slice with orange and cranberries ! It is a dieters worst nightmare and before my op I would have ordered and eaten a slice of each . But I would have pretended one was for hubby and had had to it to go , then would have snaffled it on the way home .. There was that split moment when I thought , yes , you've been so good , reward yourself ( again a dieters worst enemy ) but then I actually shrugged my shoulders at them and moved down the queue ! So I am now sitting here with a small cooked English and can only eat about half of everything
( but ate both slices of bacon Cassie ! ) ..
Feeling totally content and happy :0icanfly:. It's a whole new world ..
Shopping in Salisbury on Sunday saw a moment of old habits though .. I ate a good cooked breakfast , but an hour later hubby wanted a hot drink so we stopped for a hot choc and on the menu was a cake called Humming Bird cake .. I'd never heard of it to be honest , so automatically ordered a slice without thinking .. I wasn't in the slightest bit hungry , just wanted it .. That old food addiction rears its vile head .. Took a forkful and pushed it away , my god it was so sweet ! Yuk ! It's like carrot cake with pineapple added .. Hubby just nodded at me and said that was probably the most changed food moment he'd ever seen in me .. He was waiting for me to scoff it down like I would have ..
You know what ? That look of love and pride in his face was worth everything :)

So if your new to the journey , don't under estimate how your world is going to change , falling in love with your new self is an added bonus , falling out of love with food is an even bigger one :)
Have a wonderful day all !
Mindy
Xxxxxxx
 
I'm so proud of you for eating both slices of bacon ;) I'm teaching you all well hahahaa. Well done on your 2lb loss this week and here's to the next 2lb for you to reach 7stone.

Know what you mean exactly about the one bite and that's it. If I'm craving something I try a bit and realise I don't like it anymore and leave it well alone! However garlic bread I still enjoy and only allow myself to have it if we are eating out and even then I cut off a certain amount so I know I'm not over indulging.

I'm glad your husband noticed the change in behaviour - it really is so rewarding xxx
 
I can never give up bacon .. Bacon and cheese is my life :)
 
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It's a whole new mindset isn't it Minday? Well done, you are rightly very proud of yourself and so close to 7 stone now. It's been a life changing year for you, bring on the next one!
 
countrywench said:
Didn't expect to get in the scales but I popped into Boots and saw that it was was working for a change ! Another 2lb gone :) I now need just 2lb for my 7st :thankyouthankyou:..

This journey never ceases to amaze me .. Not that its easy , not by any means . It's been so liberating .. I finally feel that the siren called food is no longer calling me .. at this moment I'm sitting in Boswells , now you should see the Xmas food and pastries they have displayed , omg ! Seriously , a Tiramisu shortbread slice with thick chocolate on the top , another white choc slice with orange and cranberries ! It is a dieters worst nightmare and before my op I would have ordered and eaten a slice of each . But I would have pretended one was for hubby and had had to it to go , then would have snaffled it on the way home .. There was that split moment when I thought , yes , you've been so good , reward yourself ( again a dieters worst enemy ) but then I actually shrugged my shoulders at them and moved down the queue ! So I am now sitting here with a small cooked English and can only eat about half of everything
( but ate both slices of bacon Cassie ! ) ..
Feeling totally content and happy :0icanfly:. It's a whole new world ..
Shopping in Salisbury on Sunday saw a moment of old habits though .. I ate a good cooked breakfast , but an hour later hubby wanted a hot drink so we stopped for a hot choc and on the menu was a cake called Humming Bird cake .. I'd never heard of it to be honest , so automatically ordered a slice without thinking .. I wasn't in the slightest bit hungry , just wanted it .. That old food addiction rears its vile head .. Took a forkful and pushed it away , my god it was so sweet ! Yuk ! It's like carrot cake with pineapple added .. Hubby just nodded at me and said that was probably the most changed food moment he'd ever seen in me .. He was waiting for me to scoff it down like I would have ..
You know what ? That look of love and pride in his face was worth everything :)

So if your new to the journey , don't under estimate how your world is going to change , falling in love with your new self is an added bonus , falling out of love with food is an even bigger one :)
Have a wonderful day all !
Mindy
Xxxxxxx
Click to expand...
What a fantastic post. :) You have done so well and love that your Hubby is so proud of you. :) :) Reading about those sweet foods made me feel sick, and I used to regularly go to a tea room where their carrot cake was amazing. Last time I went I really didn't want it, although i thought I might when I saw it and ordered a rasher of bacon instead @starryeyed :) The shame was that it had been overcooked so was very chewy, which was not great as just had dental work.

Keep up the good work xx
 
I just love reading your posts Mindy, they ooze pride, which is so very well deserved, they encourage, inspire, advise and support each and every one of us, I dream of the day I can walk past cakes without drooling, I am walking past, mostly, but it's still a real struggle but I'm sure it will happen, well done Mindy you are doing so well :winner::banana_dancer:
 
Morning Bling
I know how hard that battle is believe me .. it maybe the wrong thing to do but in my head a started to think of these foods as poison .. to me that's what they are .. they have poisoned my life , made me unwell , unhappy etc etc .. my eyes still devour beautiful foods , not so much chocolate bars anymore , it the foods that are in cafes and coffee shops , homemade cakes etc .. those are my poisons lol ..
My band is the first thing on my mind when I wake up now , not food ..
it's all in the mind and that's what you have to fight with ...
Xxxx
 
Well done Mindy on your weight loss, and here's to reaching your goals, you're so close. What a journey you've had, I absolutely agree with falling out of love with food - I must say I constantly surprise myself these days on how I can take back control when at the start of all this, I believed I was a 'food addict' ...loved your description of a special moment with hubs too...thanks for sharing so generously...
 
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